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Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,571
Registered: ‎06-17-2015

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

@beach-mom  Send the card.  Remember that although her husband is suffering this loss, so are other family members.  Children?

 

He may very well not be the only one who will read the sympathy cards, so a card with maybe condensing what you wrote in the email would be helpful for others to understand how much your friend meant to you.

 

We need to remember that there are others mourning a death; I know when I've had deaths in the family cards were shared and read.

 

I am sorry for your loss.

 

 

 

"" Compassion is a verb."-Thich Nhat Hanh
Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,724
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

Yes, definitely send a card with a nice handwritten note. It will mean a lot to him down the road to look at and read your personal comments.  

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,328
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

I don’t think there’s ever a time where anyone can express too much sympathy and compassion for others.  Of course send a card. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,407
Registered: ‎07-07-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

@beach-mom, Since you have already connected with her huband and expressed your feelings, in a few weeks, instead of a s sympathy card, you might want to send a thinking of you card.  I would wait until things settled down before sending it.  If she had a favorite charity, you might want to send a donation.  If you are comfortable doing so, you might want to e-mail or speak with her huband in a month or so, just to lend some support.  Too often, when everything settles down, the spouse is alone and could use a friend.  My condolences on the passing of your friend.

The next time that I hear salt and ice together, it better be in a margarita!
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,324
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

I would send a card.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 23,835
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?


@beach-mom wrote:

I'd like your advice on this.

 

A good friend of mine just passed away. We worked together on projects, and that is how we met. So I didn't see her every day. I always enjoyed being around her and her husband, and I valued her advice. DH knew them well too.

 

We never socialized together outside of that, but I can honestly say I loved her.

 

The last week she was alive her husband and I e-mailed back and forth because I had to fill in for her for some things. I "talked" to him a few days before she died, and I had been to see her in the hospital shortly before that. I never thought she wouldn't get better. Someone else she worked with e-mailed me right after she died.

 

I immediately e-mailed her husband and poured my heart out about how much she meant to me. He responded right away with some kind words of his own. Both DH and I are going to visitation and her memorial service. 

 

Because of the e-mail I wrote - where I pretty much said everything - do you think I should also send a card to her husband? TIA for your help! 


@beach-mom  Sure, send a lovely card... bringing everything to a close.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 33,166
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

If he replied to the e-mail, no; if not, yes. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 33,557
Registered: ‎05-17-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?


@beach-mom wrote:

I'd like your advice on this.

 

A good friend of mine just passed away. We worked together on projects, and that is how we met. So I didn't see her every day. I always enjoyed being around her and her husband, and I valued her advice. DH knew them well too.

 

We never socialized together outside of that, but I can honestly say I loved her.

 

The last week she was alive her husband and I e-mailed back and forth because I had to fill in for her for some things. I "talked" to him a few days before she died, and I had been to see her in the hospital shortly before that. I never thought she wouldn't get better. Someone else she worked with e-mailed me right after she died.

 

I immediately e-mailed her husband and poured my heart out about how much she meant to me. He responded right away with some kind words of his own. Both DH and I are going to visitation and her memorial service. 

 

Because of the e-mail I wrote - where I pretty much said everything - do you think I should also send a card to her husband? TIA for your help! 


@beach-mom  My first reaction is of course, why not? A hand written note/card is always more personal than an email. 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 910
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

@GiantsLover......Your post is beautiful. 😢♥️
Valued Contributor
Posts: 887
Registered: ‎03-03-2016

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

Yes, please send a card, it will be appreciated.