Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,481
Registered: ‎02-22-2015

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

[ Edited ]

@beach-mom  Sorry for the sudden death of your friend. An email does not take the place of a sympathy card.

ETA: Send the card and be sure to include a check for her memorial fund if you plan on donating.


I just send a check with a card on Monday. The service is today, but nothing has been mentioned about a memorial fund yet. I made my check out to one of the adult children, c/o the deceased's name "Memorial Fund". They can decide upon the appropriate place their dad would like the donations to go when the time it better.  

Money screams; wealth whispers.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,349
Registered: ‎03-20-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

@beach-mom  I would suggest sending a card  with some memories you have of her.  When my mom died, we got so many cards with stories about my mother.  It was so touching and comforting to read them with family in the days after the funeral was over.  Those memories meant more to us than anything else.  Often words said at the time end up just a blur but the cards can be shared and those stories were remembered.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,305
Registered: ‎06-08-2016

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

A card is a small gesture that means so much after the visitors are gone.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,057
Registered: ‎08-20-2012

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

  I Never consider E-mail as personal as actual cards. a card is a Tangible, visual expression of sympathy that the bereft need not make a special effort to call up on a computer to be comforted by.  It is right there to look in a moment of sadness.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 517
Registered: ‎08-28-2018

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

[ Edited ]



Of course I always send via postal a lovely sympathy card and I also email E sympathy cards, call daily, and if person is close by I call to see them, take them out to eat, doctors visits, religious consultations, grief meeting, whatever I can do I try to do.


When someone I love or like passes I always make phone calls to their familily,  and stop by and check out if they have food, or need meds because many people my self included, when in deep grief are so overwhelmed with grief and their loss of their loved one, friend, or pet that they forget to eat and really fall into a deep depression which can become fatal if no one stops by often, emails, calls, and is just there in case they need anything.


 I also make sure they continue to have cooked food meals, and I and my family prepare many meals which include soups, stews, casseroles, roasts,  chickens, turkeys, cold cuts, plenty sliced breads.


We buy trays like TV dinner trays and make meals then cover well in aluminum foil and refrigerate, and in heavy duty freezer bags and freeze foods.


These I take  the foods and stock their fridge and freezer, so they always have something nourishing to eat and drink. Plenty bottles of water, dairy, cheeses, milk, cremora powder, juices as well as Pedia Lite, so they stay well hydrated if they forget to eat.


I also stand by and ask them to call their Physician and report the death and ask for meds to help them deal with sleeping and grief in general., then I drive them to their doctor appointment and wait to get the meds filled and take them home.


Any licensed Physician will always tell you to come right in because many people grieving commit suicide when losing someone they really loved, and also fall into very deep grief and depression and intentionally isolate themselves from everyone, so no Physician will turn anyone down to come into the office and have a check up and dispenses med scripts.


I also make breakfast, lucnh and dinner dates with them and try to get them out to eat and be among other people.


We are most vunerable when we lose our loved ones, friends, and pets and that is the time others need to reach out to us to be there in case we are not thinking clearly, not eating or drinking often, not sleeping, or just not acting correctly.


Grief can kill those left behind so we must give our all to help anyone anyway we can with kindness concern, humane compassion, tenderness, understanding, caring and most of all friendship and love.


We must also listen to what they have to say as that is very important, even if they said it many times before, because we as compassionate human beings must lend ourselves and offer comfort as best as we can, whenever we can.


We must also pray with them because prayers give faith and in turn love is nurtured and the soul that grieves does need faith, prayers, our humane compassion and understanding, in addition to our love  to properly heal.


If we fail those who lost someone our inactions/lack of compassion understanding and caring may be the root cause of their becomming so desolate and desperate that the grief tears at their soul and the pain becomes to great to bear, so they commit suicide to end the grief and pain, which if we all cared as human beings they would have received our help and medical intervention in time to continue to want to live their lives, and also benefit from religious guidance until they are healed and well enough to go on with their lives.


We must always help someone in need, before they also become another senseless statistic.


Too many celebrities and others worldwide have committed unnecessary suicides by goiing into complete isolation intentionally and then committing suicide.  


Remember the life someone saves one day may be our own, or that of someone we love, and that is something I will never forget!


"May God also watch over us all, but more so during our deepest darkest hours when intense grief overwhelms and dulls our senses".

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,028
Registered: ‎01-10-2013

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

@beach-mom, Yes, send a card,

In the loss of your good friend,

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,910
Registered: ‎11-24-2011

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

Just my opinion buy I think you should send a card. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,025
Registered: ‎06-10-2015

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

Sure a card would be a nice thing to do for him and her family.  Sorry for the loss of your friend.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,245
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

I would absolutely send a card.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,897
Registered: ‎09-08-2010

Re: Should I send a sympathy card?

Yes, send the card. Emails are not as personal.