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Valued Contributor
Posts: 537
Registered: ‎10-24-2014

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

Usually when I am invited to a shower I go in with a couple other people and pick out somthing on the registry; All the gifts aren't expensive. Pick out something that is within your budget and if you can't find something pick out something yourself. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 28,987
Registered: ‎08-23-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

[ Edited ]

@RoughDraftwrote:

I like the idea of registries.  They give me a starting point for what to look for.  No where does it say it is mandatory to choose the most expensive item on the list, but it gives one an idea of what the recipient needs/wants and I've seen the costs range from nominal to expensive.  Expensive gifts can be purchased by people who want to "go in" with others so it's affordable and close relatives usually purchase the more expensive gifts anyway.

 

As for these events getting out of hand, weddings, showers, housewarmings have been around as long as I have.  Don't want to participate...don't!


 

 

@RoughDraft    @JBKO

 

ITA .....  Getting out of hand?    I don't know why people have so much trouble with this stuff.    Send a gift and don't go if you hate the hassle .... use the registry or not.  No biggie.

 

Now ... having said that .... I DO think the "sprinkles" and "gender reveal parties" are taking things much too far .... but you can spend your money (and time) any way you want.   

 

"Sorry, but I have a conflict" is still an acceptable excuse for declining to attend.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,742
Registered: ‎10-25-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

I don’t go to every gift toting occasion I am invited to.  I never look at registries and very seldom  purchase a gift.

 

I always give a card with cash.  No one has ever been disappointed.  Sometimes if it is a baby shower, I will add a small personal gift with the cash.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,067
Registered: ‎10-01-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

Buy what you like and can afford. But really is there anything more boring than a wedding shower? My daughter and I have decided we're done with wedding showers. 

Trees are the lungs of the Earth
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,343
Registered: ‎01-27-2014

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

One should never buy a gift for someone unless they truly WANT to. Intent matters.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,239
Registered: ‎08-19-2014

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.


@Hoovermomwrote:

@Nicksmomwrote:

    I usually check the registry & decide if there is anything that I is within my budget.If not I purchase my own gift or a gift card. I don’t attend everyone that I’m invited to because it would cost me a fortune.

   I have been to a bridal shower,a sprinkle & a Christening in the last few months.I have yet to get a thank you card for my generosity!! People have no problem asking for expensive gifts.Yet they seem to think that Thank you’s aren’t necessary!!

   I’m becoming more inclined to skip these events.I was taught to always say thank you.I’ve made sure that my son always remembers to say thank you. I don’t understand this sense of entitlement!!

   

  


I believe it is proper etiquette for recipients of gifts to write a thank you note within a year.  I just received a thank you note from a gift (very generous wedding) I gave almost 10 months ago.  It was a nice surprise to receive after all of this time.   I don't look at these registeries as "entitlement" at all but a "wish list" for friends and families to have an idea of what they CAN purchase.  Personally I like them very much.


@Hoovermom  I think a year is way to long!! JMO  To each their own. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 27,223
Registered: ‎01-08-2011

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

Without reading every response, as a bride, I would have welcomed a gift card I could use for any item I wanted!

 

I don't believe I could go to an event and enjoy refreshments without bringing anything.  

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,787
Registered: ‎02-20-2017

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

As others have said, you don’t have to buy from the registry.  Give what you want and can afford 

 

Almost every registry has something in every price range on it.  I’ve never seen a registry with only big ticket items 

 

If you don’t see something on the registery, give a gift card to the store they’re registered.   

 

I really don’t know why people  make so much out of being invited to events  and figuring out what to give to people 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,681
Registered: ‎10-05-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.


@skylarkwrote:

Buy what you like and can afford. But really is there anything more boring than a wedding shower? My daughter and I have decided we're done with wedding showers. 


LOL not just wedding showers.  I know people always say they hate games at showers, but lately they don't open their gifts either.  So you've got four hours to eat and socialize. I'm usually with my friends who I see at least weekly.  We don't need four hours to visit.  Do something!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,844
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.


@Nicksmomwrote:

@Hoovermomwrote:

@Nicksmomwrote:

    I usually check the registry & decide if there is anything that I is within my budget.If not I purchase my own gift or a gift card. I don’t attend everyone that I’m invited to because it would cost me a fortune.

   I have been to a bridal shower,a sprinkle & a Christening in the last few months.I have yet to get a thank you card for my generosity!! People have no problem asking for expensive gifts.Yet they seem to think that Thank you’s aren’t necessary!!

   I’m becoming more inclined to skip these events.I was taught to always say thank you.I’ve made sure that my son always remembers to say thank you. I don’t understand this sense of entitlement!!

   

  


I believe it is proper etiquette for recipients of gifts to write a thank you note within a year.  I just received a thank you note from a gift (very generous wedding) I gave almost 10 months ago.  It was a nice surprise to receive after all of this time.   I don't look at these registeries as "entitlement" at all but a "wish list" for friends and families to have an idea of what they CAN purchase.  Personally I like them very much.


@Hoovermom  I think a year is way to long!! JMO  To each their own. 


@Nicksmom:  I didn't say I agreed with the year response time for a gift, but like I said I was happy to receive one at all.