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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,258
Registered: ‎08-19-2014

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

    I usually check the registry & decide if there is anything that I is within my budget.If not I purchase my own gift or a gift card. I don’t attend everyone that I’m invited to because it would cost me a fortune.

   I have been to a bridal shower,a sprinkle & a Christening in the last few months.I have yet to get a thank you card for my generosity!! People have no problem asking for expensive gifts.Yet they seem to think that Thank you’s aren’t necessary!!

   I’m becoming more inclined to skip these events.I was taught to always say thank you.I’ve made sure that my son always remembers to say thank you. I don’t understand this sense of entitlement!!

   

  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,283
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

I purchase what I can afford

 

I may not look at the registery. sometimes I purchase a gift sometimes I give money. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,892
Registered: ‎03-10-2013

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

Set a price and then check the list and buy within your budget. When I worked some of the gals would purchase something together. The high priced items should be bought by family members. when I raised my two kiddos I got by w/o a $500 stroller. I’m not sure what Mom used in the 50s, but we all survived.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,844
Registered: ‎07-03-2013

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

I typically don't use the registry.  

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,453
Registered: ‎04-03-2016

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

Registries give me a direction. If there are items in my planned spending amount, great. If not, I have an idea of color schemes or stores that I can give gift cards. Cash also within my scope.
I was a bit miffed when told that niece and fiancé coming to home town to meet relatives, especially since done can’t go to out of town wedding. Guess what- that occasion became a shower so guests and others told about it became expected to bring or gift. I had already planned my wedding gift so my plan went over the budgeted amount. I am not a fan of showers.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,648
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

You should enjoy your active social life by attending and buying a gift within your budget.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,739
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

Pick out a gift you like, and can afford  Big ticket items are usually purchased by a group

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,573
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

I don't know why someone wouldn't want to use the registry if there is something they can afford.  Why wouldn't you want to get someone something they need and want?  I don't see any point whatsoever in buying a gift and spending money on something they might not want or need if that is an option.

 

If there isn't something on the registry then a gift card would be the best choice.  People have a lot of stuff nowdays, and there's no right or wrong being talked about here, it's just a fact.  Often the last thing they want is more "stuff"--so make it easy on everybody.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,847
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.


@Nicksmomwrote:

    I usually check the registry & decide if there is anything that I is within my budget.If not I purchase my own gift or a gift card. I don’t attend everyone that I’m invited to because it would cost me a fortune.

   I have been to a bridal shower,a sprinkle & a Christening in the last few months.I have yet to get a thank you card for my generosity!! People have no problem asking for expensive gifts.Yet they seem to think that Thank you’s aren’t necessary!!

   I’m becoming more inclined to skip these events.I was taught to always say thank you.I’ve made sure that my son always remembers to say thank you. I don’t understand this sense of entitlement!!

   

  


I believe it is proper etiquette for recipients of gifts to write a thank you note within a year.  I just received a thank you note from a gift (very generous wedding) I gave almost 10 months ago.  It was a nice surprise to receive after all of this time.   I don't look at these registeries as "entitlement" at all but a "wish list" for friends and families to have an idea of what they CAN purchase.  Personally I like them very much.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,488
Registered: ‎04-18-2013

Re: She doesn't like to go if she has to buy a Gift.

The last two showers I attended I went in on one of the registry's bigger ticket items with a group of friends so that we could get them something they wanted.

 

As others have said, this is common practice.