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04-03-2018 04:05 PM
This is what a former coworker once said. She was referring to parties such as weddings, baby showers, birthdays, houswarmings, etcs? At first I thought that was kind of a bad attitude to have, but now I'm totally with her! With all these gift registries asking for expensive gifts ($500 stroller??), I'm really not looking forward to all these parties I'm invited to. Sometimes I wish I could just bring my own gift that I didn't necessarily find on a registry.What is your feeling?
04-03-2018 04:08 PM
You don't have to pick something from the registry.
04-03-2018 04:08 PM
any of the showers i have been to have a wide range of items that the mother to be and baby need. everything from a $2 pacifier to an expensive piece of furniture. if i wanted to buy something more expensive, a few of us would go in together to purchase it. otherwise i would purchase something that was in my price range.
dont forget.......diapers and gift cards always make a nice gift. the baby needs countless diapers in every size and a gift card would allow the mother to be to purchase what she needed or put it towards a more expensive priced item.
i think it is easier to purchase from the registry, but no one is forced to do that. if you care about or love the person why wouldnt you want to go and help her celebrate a new life?
04-03-2018 04:08 PM
@JBKO, you do not have to give anything from a registry. If you feel the need to buy a gift, why not a gift certificate to a restaurant or something like that.
04-03-2018 04:11 PM
@JBKOwrote:Sometimes I wish I could just bring my own gift that I didn't necessarily find on a registry.What is your feeling?
Where did you get the idea you had to buy from the registry? It's a request, a suggestion, a recommendation; not a mandate. Do what you want.
04-03-2018 04:13 PM
I dont blame you at all. I think weddings, showers, birthdays and housewarming has gotten out of hand. You decide if you want to attend and buy a gift for any that you have been invited to. If you decide not to attend andnot buy gifts for any of them you dont owe any explanations. If someone is crass enough to ask tell them you can not afford to buy for everyone so you dont buy for any. If you want and do attend them you give what you are comfortable with. Set a limit within your budget.
04-03-2018 04:17 PM
I bring orvsend a gift I can afford and think will be useful or attractive to the recipient(s). When in doubt about an actual object to buy, I put an amount affordable to me in an envelope (cash or check) with a card of appropriate sentiment for the occasion.
There is nothing compulsory about someone’s registry. Don’t misinterpret their right to have favorite ideas of gifts they want with your obligation to buy such gifts. They can have dreams and hopes of registry fulfillment, but you are only obliged to give with a good heart and attend if it would be meaningful. And yes, the recipient is obligated to say/write a thank you to you in a reasonable time and to dispose of or use your gift any way they want.
Etiquette is the art of balancing feelings, good manners, common sense, and fiscal practicalities. Bring your own gift.
04-03-2018 04:22 PM
You don't have to choose a gift from a registry; you can choose your own gift. You don't have to go to any gift giving party if you choose not to either. It doesn't mean you don't care for the recipient or wish them well. The gift giving trend has gotten out of control. I've cut back on the showers that I get invited to because, at my age, the showers are for my friend's children and while I knew the kids when they were young....I don't know them now.
04-03-2018 04:43 PM
@JBKOwrote:This is what a former coworker once said. She was referring to parties such as weddings, baby showers, birthdays, houswarmings, etcs? At first I thought that was kind of a bad attitude to have, but now I'm totally with her! With all these gift registries asking for expensive gifts ($500 stroller??), I'm really not looking forward to all these parties I'm invited to. Sometimes I wish I could just bring my own gift that I didn't necessarily find on a registry.What is your feeling?
I think it is a bad attitude; I'm always happy to be invited and share in someone's party/day/event etc.
04-03-2018 04:51 PM
I like the idea of registries. They give me a starting point for what to look for. No where does it say it is mandatory to choose the most expensive item on the list, but it gives one an idea of what the recipient needs/wants and I've seen the costs range from nominal to expensive. Expensive gifts can be purchased by people who want to "go in" with others so it's affordable and close relatives usually purchase the more expensive gifts anyway.
As for these events getting out of hand, weddings, showers, housewarmings have been around as long as I have. Don't want to participate...don't!
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