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Honored Contributor
Posts: 25,929
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?


@MarieIG wrote:
Have you determined your income should your DH predecease? Does he have a pension that will be reduced/ eliminated? Only one social security payment will remain. Determine what your SS payments will be at each age if you claim at 66 until age 70. (If DH's is larger than what yours would be if you postponed until age 70, there may be no point in postponing.) If your SS would be much larger than DH's if you postpone claiming, this may be something you want to consider.

I completely agree with this. My SS in just slightly less than my DH's, and each of us has a small monthly pension payment that will disappear when we die , so basically, when one of us dies the other one's income will pretty much be half what it is now. So you will need to be able to meet all your expenses on half the money -- will you be able to do that?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,930
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

Don't deprive yourself of everything that gives you joy or you will regret this decision to retire. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,939
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

[ Edited ]

How do you deal with nosy, know-it-all coworkers that keep asking "when are you retiring?" I'm only 55 and love my job. When to retire is a personal decision and I don't want to feel forced into it by bullying coworkers.

Originally joined board 12-14-2004
Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,577
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?


@151949 wrote:

I will say this - we downsized to one car and while I admit we really don't NEED 2 cars - I am not happy with this decision. For one thing my DH insists on us having a large full size SUV. I hate driving it and hate hate hate parking it, and we really do not need what is essentially a fancy truck at all. The other thing is - for this to work he has to keep me informed when he needs the car so I don't make conflicting appointments. However, I just can not get him to keep me up with all his meetings and appt.It's just like pulling teeth, so, of course, we get into conflicts of appts, and every time, no matter what I am the one sitting on a bench somewhere in the boiling sun waiting for him to come pick me up. I just get irate! I do not recommend downsizing to one car.


Possibility of Uber or Zipcar and an alternative to a second car for anyone not just 151949?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,346
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

I've been "retired" for nine months although I wasn't even 60 when I took the retirement package offered by my employer of thirty-seven years. We made sure everything was paid off, and had two new SUV's. Next thing we did was refresh the interior/ exterior of our home using my severance money. With all that covered, we could live on one income because we knew what our expenses would be. DH will retire in a year or so, at which point we'll adjust our budget accordingly. I love being retired, but I've always been a homebody. If you are a people person, I'd imagine it would be a bigger adjustment.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,630
Registered: ‎08-19-2014

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

   DH is 69 & still working. I’m 62 & haven’t worked since my son was born 26 years ago. We are planning ahead for when DH retires.

  We own a home & a rental property.Both are paid off.We own 2 good cars that are paid off.We just put in a new heating system & will be replacing our central air next year. DH has a 401k, we own stock & have a good amount of money in the bank.We have almost no credit card debt. 

   DH has put off collecting SS until age 70. At that time if he still wants to work we will bank his social security .

    We will basically be able to maintain our current lifestyle with a few tweaks.If something should happen to DH in the next 15 years, god forbid,he has taken out a life insurance policy that would make up for any money that I would lose.

    We’ve always lived nicely but below our means.We set ourselves up for the retirement that we wanted. Unfortunately,DH doesn’t want to retire!! He enjoys working.

   

  

Honored Contributor
Posts: 39,554
Registered: ‎08-23-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?


@151949 wrote:

I will say this - we downsized to one car and while I admit we really don't NEED 2 cars - I am not happy with this decision. For one thing my DH insists on us having a large full size SUV. I hate driving it and hate hate hate parking it, and we really do not need what is essentially a fancy truck at all. The other thing is - for this to work he has to keep me informed when he needs the car so I don't make conflicting appointments. However, I just can not get him to keep me up with all his meetings and appt.It's just like pulling teeth, so, of course, we get into conflicts of appts, and every time, no matter what I am the one sitting on a bench somewhere in the boiling sun waiting for him to come pick me up. I just get irate! I do not recommend downsizing to one car.


 

@151949

 

This seems to cause you a lot of unnecessary stress .....   There's really no reason you can't tell him that this "one car thing" just isn't working, and you want your own car .... is there? 

 

You gave it the benefit of the doubt, tried it, and it just doesn't work for you.   If you've spent your entire adult life working, I don't think you having your own car in retirement is an extravagance .... do you?

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,519
Registered: ‎09-01-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

Job closure forced my husband into retirement in 2010, and from there into full disability.   Due to his progressive health issues, I trusted my prayers, and my heart, and walked away from my job at the end of 2012.   There were no discussions with a financial planner; we did what we had to do.   The last year I worked, I saw 8 members of my hospital family lose spouses, 6-18 months before their projected retirement.   I was determined to have time with my husband and enjoy the life we built.   I have no regrets.

 

My husband and I started out with nothing but love, and determination.   I’m not just frugal, I’m cheap, and proud of it.  We paid our mortgage off 27 years ago, and spent our 40’s updating the house to make sure it was accessible for us as we age.   We still need 2 vehicles and bought new ones after retirement; paid cash for one, and paid the other off in a year.   I just hit 24,000 miles on my 5 year old Highlander, so I don’t go that much.   TV and internet are our entertainment.   Our daughters carry us on their cell plans for a total cost of $125 a month.  

 

I cook 95% of our food from scratch, as we prefer home cooked meals over any type of restaurant food.   We don’t eat fancy.   I stock a deep pantry and have 3 refrigerators and a freezer.   I make my trips to the grocery store count.   Right now I am stocking for winter, and will avoid shopping from right before Christmas into March when flu season is at its worst.   It’s just what works for me. 

 

I was sooo ready to stay home, and still love every minute of retirement.  I am never bored.   My husband however had a difficult time adjusting to no daily schedule, and being home all the time.   Twice a week he meets several friends for coffee, and he visits often with his best friend from work, which has helped him adjust to, and appreciate retirement.   

 

If retirement is what you really want, you will make it work.   

 

 

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 25,929
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

[ Edited ]

@jackthebear wrote:

@151949 wrote:

I will say this - we downsized to one car and while I admit we really don't NEED 2 cars - I am not happy with this decision. For one thing my DH insists on us having a large full size SUV. I hate driving it and hate hate hate parking it, and we really do not need what is essentially a fancy truck at all. The other thing is - for this to work he has to keep me informed when he needs the car so I don't make conflicting appointments. However, I just can not get him to keep me up with all his meetings and appt.It's just like pulling teeth, so, of course, we get into conflicts of appts, and every time, no matter what I am the one sitting on a bench somewhere in the boiling sun waiting for him to come pick me up. I just get irate! I do not recommend downsizing to one car.


Possibility of Uber or Zipcar and an alternative to a second car for anyone not just 151949?


Not everyone lives in the city where things like this are available. I called UBER once to go to a doctor's appt 3 miles away. It cost $50 each way because the driver had to travel all the way here from Sarasota just to pick me up.Needless to say I decided not to do that ! DH dropped me off way before my appt - went to his meeting and I had to sit and wait for him forever to come get me.

The issue is not really having only one car - the issue is he simply refuses to let me know when he has anything scheduled so I don't make conflicting appt. It has less to do with one car than it does with his controlling behavior. But, however, a second car would solve the problem.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 23,835
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Seriously considering retirement --- could we talk?

[ Edited ]

@RedTop  Thank you for sharing your beautiful story.  You did what you needed to do and did everything right. Every retirement  situation is different for everyone.

 

Your story touched my heart as DH and I lso started out with nothing but love...nothing was given to us.  We each had $3.50 cent an hour jobs when we met( minimum wage at the  time)

 

We built our lives together over the last 40 years through hills and valleys, struggles, learning experiences and sweat and tears.  But it worked out going from having basically nothing to a comfortable retirement.  And I take nothing for granted...and have such gratitude and thanks for everything  for everything we went through  to get to where we are now. I like you grocery shop the best deals, and even clip coupons. I save where I can, we never have lived extravagant. My car is 19 years old. 

 

Actually so many parts of our  40 year marriage  would make for a great comedy movie😄

 

 

Blessings to you you and your husband❤️🙂