Sentimental Attachment - Page 4

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

You always have your memories, which are more important then the house itself when all is said and done.

Plaid Pants2 · ‎03-14-2015

@chickenbutt wrote:
@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
I know that I'll "get over" my feelings of attachment with time, but it may take me awhile.

My dad is 88, and once he's gone.......

I hope you didn't think my post was a 'get over it' post. It wasn't. It was just me trying to help in the only way I know how, but I would never do the 'get over it' thing. I HATE that. I mean well.

I didn't take your post that way at all. I know that eventually I will be able to let go of my feeling like I need to "protect" it. I know that another person/family will make their own memories there.

It's just harder than I thought it would be.

Of course, it doesn't help that the house is only one mile away from where I live.

JeanLouiseFinch · ‎10-03-2011

After my dad passed away, my mom remained in the house. It was the house I grew up in from the time I was a young teenager until I got married. My parents were there for over 40 yrs. My mom operated a business from home and I worked in her office so I was there daily for many more years, plus family gatherings were there too. Eventually my mom needed to go to assisted living. One of my siblings did an excellent job of selling off large pieces of furniture, bedroom sets, dining room set, etc., but there was still a lot of "stuff". We had an estate sale one Saturday. Anything that was left was boxed and stacked in the garage for an organization to pick up - nothing went back into the house. At the end of the day, I went in the house and walked through it, stopping at every room, remembering - some happy memories, some not so happy (my dad died at home). At the end of my "remembrance tour", I sat on the fireplace hearth, had myself a good cry, and it was done.

Lilysmom · ‎03-09-2010

@JeanLouiseFinch, I could have written your post about the estate sale. We did the same thing. We had a family meeting the night before the auction and we took the pieces we wanted before the estate sale the next day. All of us (and our significant others) spent a long weekend whipping the place into shape for the sale. They even sold my father's car at the auction. Your post brought a lot of memories back! LM

Kalli · ‎03-11-2010

Can identify with the emotions. My 5 siblings and I just went through some changes with regard to our parents' old farm house. We all kept ownership of the 90 acres but the house was not wanted by all. It took some bargaining to figure out how to allow 2 youngest to be bought out and 4 oldest to keep joint ownership.

No one lives there but oldest brother and our sister will move there in a little over a year to retire.

Truly, it's a pain in the neck. Other brother and I, out of concern for our 2 oldest siblings not having anywhere to retire to, stayed on as owners and didn't ask to be bought out. But in the meantime, we have to contribute to the expenses which isn't what I'd planned when I kindly said I didn't need to be bought out!!

Love my brothers and sis, though, so it's got to be that way.

Winkk · ‎03-15-2010

I completed understand. When it was time for my parents to go to assisted living we were reluctant to sell the house. As it turned out my daughter bought it.

I lived in that house when I was young. I moved out, got married then divorced and now I'm back in the house living with my daughter. We think my Mom and Dad are happy.

jlkz · ‎12-02-2013

Your posts reminded me of the hard work I did when clearing out my parents' home. After my sisters took what they wanted, I gave linens and some decor items to the two neighbors who were always there for our parents.

After settlement for the house, DH and I went up to our mountain house for the weekend. When we got there we found that the furnace had been off for quite a while: it was warmer outside than inside. Got the portable heaters and the gas fireplace going and went out for dinner. Came home and went straight to bed.

Next morning I did some computer work and noticed the small watch nearby had stopped. Okay. Went to get dressed to head out and found my regular watch also had stopped: what is going on here? Then I noticed the time on each watch: one was 8 :23, my mom's birthday and the other was 12:19, my favorite and closest aunt's birthday.

I think it was their way of saying everything's okay and they're happy with my efforts.

By the way, my watch started up and ran a long time before needing a battery. It has a history of stopping at significant events---I truly believe it's my aunt's way of keeping in touch since she passed.

I visit my parents' neighbors and can see the many nice changes the young couple who bought their house has made. It feels as though the house has another chance at life.

thanks for the memories all your posts have stirred.......

We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.
Sir Winston Churchill

MomCat · ‎09-12-2010

@Ms X wrote:
You always have your memories, which are more important then the house itself when all is said and done.

I was about to say the same thing. After handling my parent's estate I realized the home and items were just things. I can still visualize them in their home without even being there.