Saying NO to overnight house guest request

petepetey · ‎03-09-2010

Anyone else have to turn down a request for a week long stay at your house?

My cousin is married with 2 young children. They asked if they could stay for a week

at my house. I said no, sorry.

Her husband is an ex con who she hardly knew before she got pregant. He has been fired from 3 jobs in 3 months this year. He failed a drug test each time.

I don't think it's a good idea that he stay here. Plus I don't want to cook/clean/supply linens and various other things you do when you have house guests. Plus they aren't that close to me.

I have slight guilt about it but the adult in me says if you go on vacation you should have money to pay for a hotel along with all the other things that come with it.

Bri36 · ‎02-20-2017

I would never invite myself to anyone's house.

Don't feel bad about saying no. It's your house, and you have every right to say no.

alicedee · ‎07-25-2010

I've never had anyone ask to stay for a week....but in the circumstances you describe, my answer would be so sorry, but that won't work. And NOT get sucked into the "Why not?" discussion. "I've got things going on" would be the extent of my explanation, then a subject change or end of conversation.

No guilt!!

haddon9 · ‎03-09-2010

Sounds like you dodged a bullet! I can't imagine hosting anyone even those that I'm close to (except for my kids) for a week...unless I had a huge home in a resort area but only if I invited them. Who asks to stay at someone's house for a week with their whole family?

Yardlie · ‎03-10-2010

@petepetey ... Yep! Been there/done that! I started a thread about that very subject a few months back. I think you made the right move. You might want to read some of the replies to my thread:

https://community.qvc.com/t5/Community-Chat/Said-quot-No-quot-to-Company/m-p/3638410#M1056008

A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal. ~~ Steve Maraboli

AngelPuppy1 · ‎03-13-2010

@petepetey wrote:
Anyone else have to turn down a request for a week long stay at your house?

My cousin is married with 2 young children. They asked if they could stay for a week
at my house. I said no, sorry.

Her husband is an ex con who she hardly knew before she got pregant. He has been fired from 3 jobs in 3 months this year. He failed a drug test each time.

I don't think it's a good idea that he stay here. Plus I don't want to cook/clean/supply linens and various other things you do when you have house guests. Plus they aren't that close to me.

I have slight guilt about it but the adult in me says if you go on vacation you should have money to pay for a hotel along with all the other things that come with it.

@petepetey

Oh, my! You did the right thing. This does not sound like a pleasant experience at all. I would never impose myself like that but some people just have no qualms about things like that. I'm like you --- I always feel like I have to say yes to things and then feel horrible after.

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." - Steve Martin

debic · ‎09-02-2010

That would be a no from me as well. There are people that are close enough to me that I would say yes to tho. Very few tho.

~~
*Off The Deep End~A very short trip for some!*

Allegheny · ‎03-19-2010

I have to agree with you and I know it is hard not to feel some guilt. It also makes sense to me that if people wish "to vacation" they should plan and be able to pay for their expenses and not infringe upon relatives.

I only recently had to turn down a cousin's request. He wanted to come visit our aged Uncle for a couple days, bringing his wife and two large dogs. I felt bad about declining, but we only have two bedrooms, one of which is not set up as a bedroom. He could have stayed at our Uncle's house minus the dogs which was not acceptable to him.

tends2dogs · ‎05-08-2010

@petepetey wrote:
Anyone else have to turn down a request for a week long stay at your house?

My cousin is married with 2 young children. They asked if they could stay for a week
at my house. I said no, sorry.

Her husband is an ex con who she hardly knew before she got pregant. He has been fired from 3 jobs in 3 months this year. He failed a drug test each time.

I don't think it's a good idea that he stay here. Plus I don't want to cook/clean/supply linens and various other things you do when you have house guests. Plus they aren't that close to me.

I have slight guilt about it but the adult in me says if you go on vacation you should have money to pay for a hotel along with all the other things that come with it.

@petepetey I would have done the same thing, but you really have to feel for those two children. Living in a house where the dad has failed 3 drug tests and sounds as if he is out of work.....sad. Do you think this guy is abusive? Anyway, it sounds like she must be desperate to make such a request if you really aren't that close.

Fear not Brothers and Sisters! I have read THE BOOK..........we win!!!

eyeron · ‎01-11-2015

Some people LOVE house guests....others don't. I feel unless a guest is inviting themselves over for no other reason than to just visit with YOU.... (usually good friends and close family) then you shouldn't feel bad about saying no to that person. I think it's rude and nervy when people ask to stay with friends who live in an area where they want to vacation (like Orlando) or have other plans they need to do in your area.....and they don't want to pay for a hotel. And even more nervy when they are asking for their whole family to stay with you!