Re: Rudeness from stranger. What would you do?

AngusandBuddhasMom · ‎03-10-2010

@AnotherView2 wrote:
Well, I believe there is a right way and a wrong way to handle most things.

Even if you are someone that feel he was justified in telling me to be quiet, since he had just arrived, wouldn't it have been more prudent for him to simply come over to me and nicely tell me I was being too loud for him? I know myself and would have immediately apologized and told her goodbye. I don't like offending people. I'm not a nasty or rude person. There was no need to go off the deep end and shout at me like a lunatic. We stopped as soon as he made a scene.

Hopefully the people who agreed with him and think I should have apologized realize that he was the bigger offender and the apology should have been the other way around. He walked into the situation and should have said something nicely or spoken to mgt and told them to tell me to lower it or even stop. I feel he owes me the apology. Shouting "shut up" at a stranger is the ruder offense in my book.

From your narrative I can sadly conclude that, you are like the person sitting behind me who carries on conversations in the movie theater because you think your loud whispering is quiet.

It might be that since I have worked in gyms, I try to be cognizant of others space but that is just me.

QueenDanceALot · ‎04-18-2013

I expect people to be quiet in movie theatres (hahahahahaha, silly me), but don't expect the same from a gym environment.

If someone needs total quiet and lack of disruptive sounds while working out then they should work out at home.

NativeJax · ‎01-27-2015

Well at the movies there is a tutorial on what not to do...it is irritating at the theatre but come on...at the gym there are countless TV's, music, clinging of the weights, smoothies blending in the blender, instructors "talking loudly"... I have the expectation at the gym that there will be noise...otherwise I think if people want total quiet take up mediation or yoga or go home and turn a room into a workout room.... I know, I know, somebody disagrees with me but that's okay... I will not show you my finger (insert sign that says "just joking")

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@AnotherView2 wrote:
Well, I believe there is a right way and a wrong way to handle most things.

Even if you are someone that feel he was justified in telling me to be quiet, since he had just arrived, wouldn't it have been more prudent for him to simply come over to me and nicely tell me I was being too loud for him? I know myself and would have immediately apologized and told her goodbye. I don't like offending people. I'm not a nasty or rude person. There was no need to go off the deep end and shout at me like a lunatic. We stopped as soon as he made a scene.

Hopefully the people who agreed with him and think I should have apologized realize that he was the bigger offender and the apology should have been the other way around. He walked into the situation and should have said something nicely or spoken to mgt and told them to tell me to lower it or even stop. I feel he owes me the apology. Shouting "shut up" at a stranger is the ruder offense in my book.

@AnotherView2

Oh, please ..... so now it's HIS fault that he didn't react to your boorish behavior in a way that is to your liking, so now he should apologize to you? Really?

seaBreeze · ‎02-04-2014

Sorry this happened to you .... two weeks ago, I also met up with a belligerent bully.

I know we are suppose to "turn the other cheek," but I spoke back to her in the same manner that she was addressing me. In addition, I wrote a letter to the Administrator (to get it on record)--in case of a repeat performance.

@AnotherView2

AnotherView2 · ‎06-19-2011

@AngusandBuddhasMom wrote:
@AnotherView2 wrote:
Well, I believe there is a right way and a wrong way to handle most things.

Even if you are someone that feel he was justified in telling me to be quiet, since he had just arrived, wouldn't it have been more prudent for him to simply come over to me and nicely tell me I was being too loud for him? I know myself and would have immediately apologized and told her goodbye. I don't like offending people. I'm not a nasty or rude person. There was no need to go off the deep end and shout at me like a lunatic. We stopped as soon as he made a scene.

Hopefully the people who agreed with him and think I should have apologized realize that he was the bigger offender and the apology should have been the other way around. He walked into the situation and should have said something nicely or spoken to mgt and told them to tell me to lower it or even stop. I feel he owes me the apology. Shouting "shut up" at a stranger is the ruder offense in my book.

From your narrative I can sadly conclude that, you are like the person sitting behind me who carries on conversations in the movie theater because you think your loud whispering is quiet.

It might be that since I have worked in gyms, I try to be cognizant of others space but that is just me.

I think its very hard to convey here what type of person I am...I said I thought about verbally confronting only because well, I'm human. Just about anyone would have rolled that possibility around in their mind after getting screamed at instead of being asked politely. The point was that because I am not confrontational by nature, I didn't.

Also, I am very quiet in movies so that assumption is wrong.

Also, if I was so "loud" as everyone is assuming, why didn't the other stranger agree that I should have zipped it? Why wasn't he bothered? It didn't bother him and he wanted to back me up.

I think of myself as a very aware gymgoer. I always keep to myself and am normally quiet, wearing my headphones. I'm not there to socialize. I want to get done and get out of there. In fact, when hubby and I go there together, we seperate from each other. He's a free weights guy and I like the treadmill and the machines.

rrpell · ‎11-01-2010

It is not "if", it is " when" I will offend someone. I am imperfect.

There will be times when I do not realize I am offending someone.

I try, if possible, to validate other's feelings, because we are not all the same and I believe the true test of my character is being able to look beyound myself, even if someone is rude to me.

I try to live by the Golden Rule.

I would have acknowledged him with a nod and stopped my conversation

"Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world." Nelson Mandela

nun ya · ‎03-09-2010

No, he was the idiot. He's probably been doing that forever because nobody calls him on his obnoxious behavior.

Adamlambert · ‎05-28-2015

the other guy may not like conflict, may hate the rude man, likes to tell on people or likes your looks...who knows why

NativeJax · ‎01-27-2015

@AnotherView2:
Don't pay any mind to some of the ridiculous responses from people on here...there are many people on here who needle and prod at posters...its passive/aggressive behavior.... Most of the time it doesn't bother me but sometimes it does...anyway, I think the man was beyond rude and it should have been handled differently on his part...hopefully you will not have to encounter him again:-)