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Registered: ‎06-03-2017

@Mz iMacwrote:

The diners in my neck of the woods have 2 separate rooms.  One for customers who have "young" children & the main room for "adults."

 

If the children get "unruly" a waitress will close the door.  The family rooms (is what they are called) are soundproof. Smiley LOL

 


@Mz iMac Oh that sounds wonderful.  You'd think there would be more places like that and that they would be successful, however, not that this is the same, but every year I go on vacation to an all-inclusive somewhere in Mexico or the Carribbean for vacation for 2 weeks in the summer.   My number one must-have is a resort that is "adults only."  You would think that in areas like Cabo San Lucas, Cancun, Punta Cana and Barbados would have many adults only properties, but it's only a small fraction of the available resorts that are that way.  It's really hard to find a lot of options for a child-free atmosphere.  It may end up alienating a lot of people if restaurants go child-free.

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Okay...I'm going out on a limb with this and will probably get a ton of bricks thrown at me as well.  I teach 2nd grade (have taught other elementary grades as well) and I can attest children (in general..not all) are not taught manners or how to respect their teachers and other adults. It's troublesome and sad.

 

I've taught for 27 years, and this December will be my retirement year.  I can honestly say, the lack of respect from children has been steadily increasing.       

Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life!
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@CARMIEwrote:

We don’t frequent restaurants  often, but when we are on vacation, we often have no choice.

 

i have three children and two youngest are only 1 year apart.  Years ago when  we took our children into a restaurant, we went during “off hours” never during the rush hours for any meal. That way my kids would not be overwhelmed and bother other patrons.

 

My children never hit us or dumped things on the table.  They were not allowed to get out of their seat and run around either.  We usually took a new toy or something to keep them occupied.  My daughter who is the oldest, was a perfect child from birth to age 16. She just did as she was told and we could take her anywhere. Her daughter is the same way.

 

My boys...close in age, would sometimes try something they weren’t allowed to do, and they were taken outside until they they understood  the rules and were ready to return.  I am a no nonsense parent.

 

i take my grandkids into restaurants..all three at once.  I have never had a problem with them either, though my son has on occasion with his two.  Kids just naturally listen to me.  I give them the “look” and they settle down.

 

Sometimes patents don’t have a choice in taking kids to a restaurant.  They have to eat too. In your case, the kids were there during an off hour, but the parents should have made them behave and taken them outside if they acted up. And, they should have seated themselves away from other people since there were empty seats.  Sounds like bad parenting.

 

Then, there are children and adults who have emotional or other health issues,that make it impossible for them to be seated and be quiet.  When someone has a handicap, the rest of us should try to understand.

 

There are some restaurants that do not allow children or only allow respectful children.  They are usually expensive places where it would be too costly to feed kids there anyway.

 

Small family run restaurants often do not do that.  They can’t afford to lose the business of families.  They need the money to stay in business.  If this the only time something like this happen in this restaurant, I would just forget about it.  If it happens often, i’d look for another place to have lunch.

 


@CARMIE  How does one determine if a child has an "emotional" health issue or if the child is just unruly?

 

I see this from time to time-that the diners are responsible to "try to understand" or "be more tolerant".

 

Yes, everyone has to eat.  However, it isn't my responsibility to determine if a child is just obnoxious or has an "issue" for which I should be more understanding.

 

Thrown the bricks now.  But my question is sincere.

""Out beyond the ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing, there is a field. I will meet you there." -Rumi
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@ciaobellawrote:

Okay...I'm going out on a limb with this and will probably get a ton of bricks thrown at me as well.  I teach 2nd grade (have taught other elementary grades as well) and I can attest children (in general..not all) are not taught manners or how to respect their teachers and other adults. It's troublesome and sad.

 

I've taught for 27 years, and this December will be my retirement year.  I can honestly say, the lack of respect from children has been steadily increasing.       


@ciaobella Oh, it's not just kids.  Earlier today, one of my employees, who has been stirring up drama with his coworkers all week, left me a voicemail in which he flat out lied to me.  I sent him a kind, positive email not mentioning any of the bad things he did, but encouraging him to move past the drama and focus on the good work he was doing. He replied with a one sentence insult.  I've had quite a day!

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@ciaobella  I agree with you 100%.  Parents are not teaching their children manners.  In addition, Kids talk to adults the  same as they do to their peers.

 

They are not taught respect.

 

One of my neighbors has two young boys.  They are the sweetest, kindest kids with the nicest manners I have seen in a long time.  They are a breath of fresh air.  So some parents are still doing a great job.

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They probably don’t discipline their kids or teach them how to behave in public.  

 

We took our kids to restaurants from the time they were infants - nicer ones and restaurants geared for families.   They never fussed and were always well behaved

 

I have a feeling these kids get away with that behavior at home.   That’s very sad IMO

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Registered: ‎07-11-2010

This is why I get take out and eat at home in peace.

I promise to remind myself every day that I am strong, courageous, and resilient.
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What I think is molded by being a parent and having to deal with my own children when going out from the time they were infants to now (my youngest is 11 and my oldest is 21):

 

 Many parents take their kids to places where kids can run, scream, throw food, etc. Think McDonalds, Burger King, Chick fil A as they all have child areas. Also, many "family friendly" resturants are FULL of parents with young kids who "can be kids" as their parents would say. If this is how they are allowed to act; if this is how the see OTHER kids act, is anyone surprised that when they go to ANY type of resturant this is their behavior? I'm not. It makes sense, if you think about it.

 

We took our kids OUTSIDE IMMEDIATELY if they misbehaved in any way. Didn't matter where we were eating, you behaved as expected. My boys would ask why other kids did this and that and I would reply that is was due to their parents not doing THEIR job and allowing their children to misbehave. As my kids got older, it was that plus because the children don't know any better. They get it now whenever we go out. 

 

On the flip side, if children NEVER to anywhere other than the places I mentioned, they're never going to see how others behave. I'm proud that my children could go to any restaurant and we didn't have to do anything beyond a look. We also didn't take an infant to a place that, as adults, WE would like to go to without hearing children. After all, we have them 24/7 and need a break as well. Manner begin at home; as does learning how to act at the table, using silverware, crystal, etc. How many bother with that today? That's part of the problem.

 

In the end, this comes down to the parents; the so-called adults. There are some GREAT parents out there. There are also many useless parents. Sadly, you were dealing with the latter.

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Similar thing happened to my daughter this past Tuesday. She had gone into a cafe for lunch. It was early still, lots of tables available. My daughter was eating her lunch and playing a game on her phone. A family of 4 come in and took the table right next to my daughter. Mom and dad in their 30's, a 2 and 4 year old my daughter thought. As soon as the mom sat down she said to my daughter, " Could you put your phone away. My daughter(the 2 year old ) will want to play with it".  My daughter looked at her and said "Then you should teach your daughter not to touch other people's property", and went back to eating her lunch and her phone.  When she told me what happened, I told her, well done!  It is the mom's and dad's responsibility to teach her kids what is right and wrong and to not touch other's property.  I agree, parents need to step up their game and start parenting their kids! Not expect others to do it for them.

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@ciaobellawrote:

Okay...I'm going out on a limb with this and will probably get a ton of bricks thrown at me as well.  I teach 2nd grade (have taught other elementary grades as well) and I can attest children (in general..not all) are not taught manners or how to respect their teachers and other adults. It's troublesome and sad.

 

I've taught for 27 years, and this December will be my retirement year.  I can honestly say, the lack of respect from children has been steadily increasing.       


@ciaobella  God bless you for teaching for 27 years! Manners are what separate us from the animals, and I’ve seen animals more behaved than a lot of kids these days. That’s frightening when you think about it. I hope you enjoy a long and healthy retirement.😊