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Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,894
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

@TenderMercieswrote:

@occasionalrainwrote:

The world does not belong to me, nor does it belong to inconsiderate parents with obnoxious, smelly children. No one should be expected to endure that to which the OP was subjected.

 

As long as we tolerate it, say nothing, and quietly leave, the offenders will continue their unacceptable behavior. Children who can not or will not sit in their seat quietly at restaurants or theaters shouldn't be there. 


@occasionalrain Honestly, there are two main reasons why I didn't say anything.  First, I did not want to upset the children even more than they already appeared, and although one of the parents probably should have gotten up within the first 5 minutes of sitting down to take the infant ot the bathroom to change her/him, they seemed to have their hands full with the two older children.  Kicking them when they are down just didn't seem like the kind thing to do.  Second, I am a white person, and this was a Hispanic family.  I did not want to be labeled as a racist, and if they were feeling defensive, it would have been easy for them to accuse me of that.  Considering that I was also in a restaurant owned and operated by another minority, it would have looked doubly bad if they started screaming, "racist" at me.  I like eating there, and I'd like to go back.


In that case, retreat was your best, only sensible option. Anything other may have gotten you on the net with death threats to follow.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 648
Registered: ‎03-04-2017

You are not the only one but Im glad that you are observant and know the appropriate behavior in public. I really think its the parents responsibility to do so. They should discipline their children as to how to behave in public places or around other people etc. I come across this many times. I can understand that parents are exausted and tired etc etc... but that comes with having children you know. That doesnt mean that everyone else has to see misbehaved kids. Also, if you had your kids who behaved super good at restaurants or public places, you wouldnt want them to pick up bad habits from watching other kids doing stuff like that as if its not a big deal. I know sometimes it can be hard to tell kids certain things and kids have different personalities. Some want to behave and others purposely dont in order to get negative attention. When i was growing up, i always stayed by my moms side, quiet. All she had to do was look at me and i would know not to do something. These days, i dont know what to say. its as if the kids are ruling the parents and parents act like as if they're the victims and are helpless. Good parenting is definitley something parents should look into. 

~No act of kindness, no matter how small is ever wasted~ Aesop
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,672
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

I am so sorry that the inconsiderate parents ruined your peaceful lunch.  Why they chose to sit in the booth close to yours when there were so many empty tables available is a mystery.

 

I would like, at this point to tell about a lovely experience I recently had.  My daughter and I were sitting in a booth and directly across from us were two booths in which each one had a mother, father and four children.  They were not related in any way.  My first thought was, oh, oh, this may not be a good place to sit.  Much to my surprise and delight throughout the entire meal there was not one peep from any of the eight children across from us.

 

We finished our meal first and when we got up to leave I went to both families and congratulated them on how well behaved their children were.  Whatever those parents did, they did well, and deserved to be thanked for it.  It certainly made our dining pleasurable when it could have been a nightmare.

 

 

 

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,588
Registered: ‎12-23-2015

that makes alot of sence to ave separate rooms like that. years ago children were taught how to act. now alot of time you see kids that basiclly run there parents.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,443
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Children can be taught to behave in public, I know because I raised two children and they always behaved, but I never took my children out to dinner when it was their bed time and we never lingered when we had the kids, they do get restless after a while, they're kids.  I don't mind so much when we're at a family type restaurant but when I'm at a more expensive restaurant or a place where I personally think children don't belong, like a vineyard where the main event is alcohol, it does upset me. We went out to brunch once and a large family, 3 generations were together, the children were well behaved and having a good time but keep getting up to get dessert.  One of the parents said "sorry", I just smiled and said that I'd keep going back to the dessert station too if I were them, they were kids and they were fine but for the most part I do notice that parents today tend to let their children do what they want when they want.  I never had a hard time teaching my children to behave but again, I never put them into a position where they had to behave like adults either, they're children.  

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,349
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

In my view, a lot of kids probably scream and generally misbehave because they are tired.

 

I think parents drag their very young chidren around to much.  They aren't getting proper rest and they get bored, tired, etc.

 

I used to eat in restaurants quite a bit when I was a child, mostly with my grandparents.  These were "white tablecloth" restaurants. It was a fun experience for me.  

 

I think kids can be taught proper manners, but they have to be properly rested and have a good overall routine in their lives first.

If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need.--Marcus Tullius Cicero
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Re: Restaurant Rant

[ Edited ]

@suzyQ3wrote:

@sol_lunawrote:

@suzyQ3wrote:

@SandPiperwrote:

@TenderMercies I noticed a couple restaurants opening up with signs in the window that say “ adults only”. I know families with children that are upset over this.  Heck my husband works a lot of hours and when he is off and we want a relaxing dinner out we go to one of these restaurants. We are assured a nice quiet dinner.


Jeez, I'd wonder just what the heck was being served in those restaurants. :-)


Food that you can find in restaurants like Morton's, Ruth Chris, or other high-end restaurants. In other words, NO burgers, pizza, grilled cheese, etc. or any food that would appeal to children.


@sol_luna, again, as I mentioned to SPURT, it was joke regarding "adults only."

 

However, did you know that some of the finest restaurants in the country serve -- gasp! -- hamburgers, pizza, and versions of grilled cheese?

 

As for what appeals to children, my grandchildren were eating all sorts of ethnic food and dining in fine restaurants since they were very young. They behaved or steps were taken by their parents (rare occurrence). Now at 12 and 14 they are professional diners. :-)


Thanks for telling me something I already know.  I consider the food you mentioned as "kids" food whether they are served in chain restauarnts or in served in upscale restaurants.

Respected Contributor
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@TenderMercies wrote:

Once a week, I eat lunch by myself at a Vietnamese restaurant.  It gives me a chance to get away from my office and enjoy a nice meal in peace and quiet.  

 

I usually go around 2PM, so the lunch rush is over, and I won't feel bad taking up a table by myself.  Today I arrived at 2PM, and there were only 3 tables occupied out of the 30 or so in the restaurant which is one large room.  As usual, you can seat yourself, so I took a booth in the rear, right corner of the room and ordered my food. 

 

Everything was delicious, and during the meal, one table left, and another couple came in and sat down.  All 4 of the occupied tables were spread out in the room.  About 3/4 of the way through my meal, in walks a family of 5 consisting of 2 parents in their 30's an infant, and what looked like a 2 year old boy and 4 year old girl.  They walk right over and sit down in the booth which is back to back with mine.  Luckily I was sitting on the side of the table that was not the side that was back to back with them.  I was facing them with the empty seat at my table being back to back with theirs.  

 

Before they all even sat down, the little girl started crying and hitting her father on the arm.  Instead of disciplining her or holding her hands down, the father holds his hands up in front of him to protect himself, as if he were getting charged by a bear.  She then started taking the sauce ramekins on the table, turning them upside down, and banging them on the table.  I immediately smelled something which alerted me that the infant needed to be changed, then the little boy started screaming as well.  By this point, I had already put my credit card on the table and had waved down the server to bring the check.  I paid and left as quickly as possible, appetite lost, without finishing the meal.

 

Am I the only one who feels that parents shouldn't take children to restaurants until they are sure that the children can behave appropriately in restaurants?  I think restaurants should have a ratings system like the movies.  I think that would ensure that everyone eating there would have an enjoyable experience.  

 

 


I hate that, too.  One time we ate at our favorite restaurant when a little boy crawls over the booth onto my husband’s shoulders.  I asked the parents to retrieve the kid and they just laughed at us.  The waiter moved us and the parents kept taunting us.  It’s like going to the movies. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,633
Registered: ‎10-21-2010

When my niece and nephew were that little my sister or her husband would take them out to the car for five minutes if they acted up. It usually worked. They are older now so there is no issues. Kids are going to have meltdowns that you can’t predict. It’s wll on how the parents handle them.