Community Chat

[VioletEyes]

Take your time sending money until you re-acquaint yourself with this friend. Sadly, people do change and how you remember her from years ago, may be quite different than who she is today.

Just tread lightly.

[QueenDanceALot]

On 9/23/2014 SoftRaindrops said:

Take your time sending money until you re-acquaint yourself with this friend. Sadly, people do change and how you remember her from years ago, may be quite different than who she is today.

Just tread lightly.

I agree.

[Krimpette]

I totally agree about treading lightly for now. I hate to be cynical, but it sounds like she put a considerable effort into finding you (on Facebook through your adult children)….all of a sudden, after all these years. And her first contact seems to be pouring her heart out to you with all her problems. I'm presuming that you don't live anywhere near each other? I think it's good that she has her church assisting her. Beyond that, again…. please tread lightly for awhile. (Sorry to sound cynical, but your post reminds me so much of something similar I had experienced with an "old friend" several years ago.)

[Suziepeach]

I agree about treading lightly and being skeptical.. it would have to be a very, very close friend of whom I was in touch with all the time that I'd think about lending money. Someone that hadn't been in touch in years- it would be a distant friendship but that's just me..

[RainyDayGal]

I would wonder about someone who looked me up after all these years. Especially with the financial problems. I could be wrong, but maybe she is really wanting you to take pity on her and start giving her money. I would limit your interaction with her to phone calls for now.

[deepwaterdotter]

Your friendship and your time are the most valuable gifts you can offer anyone at anytime.

[QueenDanceALot]

Ask yourself if you reconnected with someone after many years if you would start by talking about all of your financial problems.

I wouldn't. I would be somewhat suspicious of someone who did.

[ahoymate]

On 9/23/2014 RedConvertibleGirl said:

I would wonder about someone who looked me up after all these years. Especially with the financial problems. I could be wrong, but maybe she is really wanting you to take pity on her and start giving her money. I would limit your interaction with her to phone calls for now.

ITA. I've had several people I thought were friends. I was a "helper", did things to be kind. When the rubber hit the road these people weren't there for me. There are givers and takers in this world. Tread carefully.

[MickD]

...yes....a slight red flag warning. If you want to be a true friend...listening and offering support and advice (when asked) is plenty.

[Mama Mia]

If it were me,I wouldn't call her first or send a gift card or anything like that. We know you are a good person, but don't get taken advantage of.

mm