Community Chat

[Anglophilly]

I think a gift has to be given with an open heart and hand. No strings or expectations.

Withholding to teach a lesson probably will do nothing except to engender further alienation.

The ball is in your husband's court. He most assuredly doesn't need reminders of his kids' shortcomings.

Don't poke the bear, especially in this season of peace. A discussion at another time, perhaps.

[TaxyLady]

If someone does not give me a thank you, they would not get another present. In this case I blame the parents, not the kids. The parents should instruct the kids to at least call to show their appreciation. As a child I was taught how to acknowledge a gift by my mother. Nowadays, it seems parents are raising very self centered kids.

[Snowpuppy]

If this is your husband's grandchildren then I'd speak with him first. If he insists on sending a gift then cut the amount in 1/2 and send that.

If a gift isn't acknowledged then my belief is that it wasn't wanted nor appreciated.

[qualitygal]

Right spot on! Your money, your decision, and if they can't take the time to say thank you, nutz to them! There is such a thing as good manners, and most are taught at an early age how to say, "thank you".

[polar]

Thank you all who responded. I appreciate it.

[Kachina624]

The latest thing in this electronic era is for mom to send a thank you email and sign the kid's name. I want to laugh when I read them because it's her use of the language, not theirs that I read. I bet your husband's kids all have computer access; why not ask them for their email addresses so you can verify receipt of the gifts? If you fail to receive an acknowledgement, send a msg that since they don't seem to be receiving the gifts, you think it's best to quit sending them. How much effort would an email be for them?

[stevieb]

My choice would be to send them the gifts this year with a little note, nicely worded, that it would be sincerely appreciated for them to simply let you both know they were received. If no such confirmation was forthcoming, I'd discuss with their grandfather earlier next year whether it might be nice to donate their 'gifts', ensuring they received notification of their 'donations' to whatever charity you choose... Believe me, they'll get the point and you won't have jumped the shark at the last minute... Preserve the peace this year and make your point next year when there's time to do so in advance of the holidays.

[AnikaBrodie]

I think it's time for a wakeup call.

You should give your money to charity and send the adults and kids a card saying you donated X amount of $$$ to (name of charity) in honor of them. There are so many reputable charities out there; I am sure you will find some that you can support, and you will know you are helping someone in need. It's a rewarding feeling.

Merry Christmas.

[reiki604]

On 12/22/2014 AnikaBrodie said:

I think it's time for a wakeup call.

You should give your money to charity and send the adults and kids a card saying you donated X amount of $$$ to (name of charity) in honor of them. There are so many reputable charities out there; I am sure you will find some that you can support, and you will know you are helping someone in need. It's a rewarding feeling.

Merry Christmas.

Terrific idea!!