Question about being in a Catholic church service - Page 4

Noel7 · ‎03-09-2010

@Ms X wrote:
@Noel7 wrote:
This is 2016, no longer 1950.

We live in a diverse country that recognizes we are not all the same and that most of us have friends and relatives of different faiths or who are agnostic/atheist.

I would hope most people in the pews recognize that and are welcoming of others.

I would suggest being respectful of the faithful there and not feeling you must participate if it is not your normal practice.
Well, @Noel7, let's say I went to a Protestant service in a black congregation where they sang that fabulous gospel music that I love so much. I would want to have a way of joining in rather than just sitting there. If there is a common sign between your religion and theirs, I think it would be a way of having some common ground without feeling you were betraying your own religious beliefs.

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There is no common sign of the cross between those who are Jewish or Muslim or numerous other religions @Ms X

There is also no religious commonality between those who pray and those who do not believe in prayer.

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

@Noel7 wrote:
@Ms X wrote:
@Moonchilde wrote:
I know the OP did not address this, nor does the thread specifically, but what about people who *cannot* kneel, i.e. it would be extremely painful for them to do so and to get back up. I'm sure there are many, Catholics and non-Catholics who attend services, for whom this is the case. Often people do not physically appear unable; do others judge those who do not kneel? You wouldn't necessarily know if they were Catholic or not - they might well be, but simply unable to kneel.
That is an excellent point, @Moonchilde. As a lapsed Catholic, I would suggest that people put their hands in the prayer position or make the sign of the cross when others kneel. It would be an alternative way for them to participate without causing pain to themselves.

As for OP, I must admit that I would feel offended if someone just sat there. However, if that would be a betrayal to your own religion, it is understandable that you would not wish to participate. Is there some common sign between Catholics and your religion that you could use as a way of participating but not participating as a Catholic? Perhaps putting your hands together in the sign of prayer while others are kneeling would be a nice way of joining in? I am a lapsed Catholic since I had my confirmation, but it never really leaves you.
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@Ms X

We don't ask those who are not Christian to make the sign of the cross. It most certainly would cause pain to some people.

Atheists and Agnostics should not be expected to look like they are praying when in fact they do not pray.
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I'm not sure I agee, @Noel7. You could certainly describe me as an agnostic and on a bad day maybe an atheist. However, when I've been to churches I haven't felt one bit offended about joining in. We don't need to fixate on the sign of the cross, though. Even something that is part of their religion or something non-religious would suffice. There are many ways of participating. If I was at a Jewish service, for example, I would want to participate in any way I could. I've had quite a few Jewish friends over the years.

SahmIam · ‎04-16-2010

Follow the group. Though there are those that don't kneel, I have seen them stand and sit when everyone else does. You don't have to say the prayers, you don't have to shake hands, you don't have to take the Sacraments, you don't have to bless yourself or genuflect but to sit there throughout.... kinda rude.

When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

@Noel7 wrote:
This is 2016, no longer 1950.

We live in a diverse country that recognizes we are not all the same and that most of us have friends and relatives of different faiths or who are agnostic/atheist.

I would hope most people in the pews recognize that and are welcoming of others.

I would suggest being respectful of the faithful there and not feeling you must participate if it is not your normal practice.

I would hope this would be the case, whether one is speaking of Catholicism or another religion, but based on a few responses in this thread and in other threads, I have doubts it is always the case.

I am agnostic and do not follow any organized religious observance, but I have attended both mass (years ago when they were still in Latin) and a bar mitzvah to honor the individuals involved. I have no issues attending a religious service of any kind (Sikh, Buddhist, whatever) and would not go if my intention was not respect for the tradition and/or the individual. But it's unfortunate that there will always be a few people who will wish I wasn't there and consider my attendance an annoyance or an insult.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Noel7 · ‎03-09-2010

@Moonchilde wrote:
@Noel7 wrote:
This is 2016, no longer 1950.

We live in a diverse country that recognizes we are not all the same and that most of us have friends and relatives of different faiths or who are agnostic/atheist.

I would hope most people in the pews recognize that and are welcoming of others.

I would suggest being respectful of the faithful there and not feeling you must participate if it is not your normal practice.

I would hope this would be the case, whether one is speaking of Catholicism or another religion, but based on a few responses in this thread and in other threads, I have doubts it is always the case.

I am agnostic and do not follow any organized religious observance, but I have attended both mass (years ago when they were still in Latin) and a bar mitzvah to honor the individuals involved. I have no issues attending a religious service of any kind (Sikh, Buddhist, whatever) and would not go if my intention was not respect for the tradition and/or the individual. But it's unfortunate that there will always be a few people who will wish I wasn't there and consider my attendance an annoyance or an insult.

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@Moonchilde

Yes, indeed. Especially if you don't do the hypocritical thing and pretend to be what you are not.

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

@SahmIam wrote:
Follow the group. Though there are those that don't kneel, I have seen them stand and sit when everyone else does. You don't have to say the prayers, you don't have to shake hands, you don't have to take the Sacraments, you don't have to bless yourself or genuflect but to sit there throughout.... kinda rude.

When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

This is good advice. You don't have to fully participate, but it is a sign of respect to participate to some degree rather than just sit there throughout the Christian, Muslim, or Jewish service. It shows respect.

Moonchilde · ‎05-23-2010

@Noel7 and @Ms X,

I have perhaps an odd feeling about prayer, for an agnostic/atheist.

As long as the person is genuinely sincere about an illness or personal situation and not being deliberately snarky (you know what I'm talking about), it doesn't bother me or offend me or make me feel uncomfortable if someone prays for me.

I don't think of prayer in the same way a religious person does - I don't have any expectation of a result or feel that Someone is actively listening and weighing the request. But I do believe that all positive, loving thoughts are welcome, always. Loving energy cannot be "bad" in any way AFAIC.

During a church service when others are praying, I bow my head (as universal a gesture as there may be in a house of worship). I don't "pray" in the way the congregation does, but I am thinking about the individual(s) being prayed for and send them my thoughts, good wishes and positive energy. In that sense. I think "prayer" is pretty universal and I'd be surprised if it was foreign to any belief, or non-belief.

Life without Mexican food is no life at all

Kitlynn · ‎03-09-2010

You are there for a funeral service not for church so it would be appropriate for you to do what you feel comfortable with. Since you are not Catholic you won't know what is protocol during mass and there is no reason you should. It is not disrespectful in any way to just sit and listen.

Noel7 · ‎03-09-2010

IMO what shows respect is to realize we are not all alike and that we must be respectful of others. It's not a one-way street where we demand respect but do not give it to other faiths.

I don't know of any Jewish person who would not be offended at being told they must make the sign of the cross if they wanted to attend certain services. I also don't know of any Catholic church in this day and age that would expect it.

It seems some are not watching the MANY multi-cultural services we see at important events which are recorded on television.

People of different faiths and no faith at all get along very well in such gatherings. Each one follows their own path.

conlt · ‎03-16-2010

It is OK not to kneel. I am Catholic and I don't often kneel because I have pain in my legs. You should not go to Communion though because that is a Sacrament.