Community Chat

[RainCityGirl]

On 3/12/2014 reese ~ said:

On 3/11/2014 RainCityGirl said:

Here's the deal. Kids can be mean and brutal. While the pony bag may be the boy's choice du jour, he many have to rethink rainbows and ponies. To me, it's like wearing a neon sign that says "Kick me." I know it's not right and it's the other kids, not him, but sometimes, you just have to take the path of least resistance in order to be free of harassment. I don't know all the details regarding the school's handling of this. I would assume that the parents of the bullies were brought into it, but maybe not. Kids get picked on for a variety of reasons, some of it not their fault, and some of it fomented by them. Chances are he also gets bullied about his name and possibly by how he behaves in social situations. Just a guess. At any rate, even if the school took drastic action, that doesn't guarantee he wouldn't still be bullied...off campus, of course. As I said....kids are vicious and cruel at times, and anything this boy can do to diminish the attacks would contribute to a more pleasant environment for him.

Using this logic, which may be true, there is no reason to leave the bag at home. He's already been designated as a target, so nothing would be likely to change.

If my son were strong enough to want to take that darned bag, knowing full well what he may be in store for, what kind of a mother would I be to deny him that? What lesson would I be teaching him? I truthfully think that at his young age, he is already more mature than the adults around him who seem to feel it's best to capitulate rather than stand up for what you believe in.

This is the key point here: IF. Is this boy that strong? Sometimes, if you know how to take the pain away, then you have to make choices. As i have said previously, there may be much, much more to this whole story that we are not privy to, and schools are not allowed to discuss personal facts in a case. It's a shame that people can't learn to live and let live, but bad behavior is modeled all the time in the adult world.

[RainCityGirl]

On 3/11/2014 Opurrra said:

On 3/11/2014 RainCityGirl said:

Here's the deal. Kids can be mean and brutal. While the pony bag may be the boy's choice du jour, he many have to rethink rainbows and ponies. To me, it's like wearing a neon sign that says "Kick me." I know it's not right and it's the other kids, not him, but sometimes, you just have to take the path of least resistance in order to be free of harassment. I don't know all the details regarding the school's handling of this. I would assume that the parents of the bullies were brought into it, but maybe not. Kids get picked on for a variety of reasons, some of it not their fault, and some of it fomented by them. Chances are he also gets bullied about his name and possibly by how he behaves in social situations. Just a guess. At any rate, even if the school took drastic action, that doesn't guarantee he wouldn't still be bullied...off campus, of course. As I said....kids are vicious and cruel at times, and anything this boy can do to diminish the attacks would contribute to a more pleasant environment for him.

do you feel boys and girls in high school should also hide their sxuality for fear of being beaten by bully homophobic kids?

No, I don't, but actually there is more sensitivity training and knowledge of laws governing anti gay, se x ist remarks, inappropriate touching, ra ci sm, physical and mental afflictions, and gender bias than there is in basic bullying.

[voyager1980]

Moving up for Silver Lotus (:

[Silver Lotus]

On 3/18/2014 voyager1980 said:

Moving up for Silver Lotus (:

Thanks Voyager! So I guess the new thing is now the backpack has been banned?

Sorry Marp!

[Vamp]

On 3/11/2014 Lila Belle said:

Were the other children punished ?

Jmo, but he seems to be inviting the trouble. Should he be taunted and pushed around ? No, he shouldn't but I think the school has given them good advice. He has become the distraction now and the Facebook page isn't helping his cause either.

I fail to see how an innocent child is inviting trouble because he likes something that others don't find acceptable. The problem is not the kid who likes My Little Pony; the problem is the culture in which it is acceptable to bully someone for not conforming to social norms that are arbitrary and culturally-imposed. What if the little boy liked to wear pink? You realize, I hope, that pink is not inherently a "girl" color any more than blue is a "boy" color. It's just some arbitrary "rule" that someone invented and that we, as a culture, accepted.

It saddens me that so many people think it's okay to punish someone or teach a child that it's not right to have a personal preference like that. It's so arbitrary. The kid with the MLP backpack is not hurting anyone nor is it an offensive message...so why is he being punished? It makes no sense.

[Silver Lotus]

It is very difficult to tell children not to bully other children when their parents are bullying other adults who are different from the popular norm.

[Vamp]

On 3/12/2014 RainCityGirl said:

On 3/11/2014 Opurrra said:

On 3/11/2014 RainCityGirl said:

Here's the deal. Kids can be mean and brutal. While the pony bag may be the boy's choice du jour, he many have to rethink rainbows and ponies. To me, it's like wearing a neon sign that says "Kick me." I know it's not right and it's the other kids, not him, but sometimes, you just have to take the path of least resistance in order to be free of harassment. I don't know all the details regarding the school's handling of this. I would assume that the parents of the bullies were brought into it, but maybe not. Kids get picked on for a variety of reasons, some of it not their fault, and some of it fomented by them. Chances are he also gets bullied about his name and possibly by how he behaves in social situations. Just a guess. At any rate, even if the school took drastic action, that doesn't guarantee he wouldn't still be bullied...off campus, of course. As I said....kids are vicious and cruel at times, and anything this boy can do to diminish the attacks would contribute to a more pleasant environment for him.

do you feel boys and girls in high school should also hide their sxuality for fear of being beaten by bully homophobic kids?

No, I don't, but actually there is more sensitivity training and knowledge of laws governing anti gay, se x ist remarks, inappropriate touching, ra ci sm, physical and mental afflictions, and gender bias than there is in basic bullying.

Yes, but very little understanding and sensitivity to those who are transgender. Believe it or not, gender is not binary, as many of us were taught to believe. I am not talking about s--ual preference, but gender identity. People should be allowed to be who they are--as long as it's not hurting anyone--without fear of recrimination, prejudice, or violence. Yes, violence. There's quite a bit of it still towards the L-G-B-T community.

[JaneMarple]

On 3/18/2014 Vamp said:

On 3/12/2014 RainCityGirl said:

On 3/11/2014 Opurrra said:

On 3/11/2014 RainCityGirl said:

Here's the deal. Kids can be mean and brutal. While the pony bag may be the boy's choice du jour, he many have to rethink rainbows and ponies. To me, it's like wearing a neon sign that says "Kick me." I know it's not right and it's the other kids, not him, but sometimes, you just have to take the path of least resistance in order to be free of harassment. I don't know all the details regarding the school's handling of this. I would assume that the parents of the bullies were brought into it, but maybe not. Kids get picked on for a variety of reasons, some of it not their fault, and some of it fomented by them. Chances are he also gets bullied about his name and possibly by how he behaves in social situations. Just a guess. At any rate, even if the school took drastic action, that doesn't guarantee he wouldn't still be bullied...off campus, of course. As I said....kids are vicious and cruel at times, and anything this boy can do to diminish the attacks would contribute to a more pleasant environment for him.

do you feel boys and girls in high school should also hide their sxuality for fear of being beaten by bully homophobic kids?

No, I don't, but actually there is more sensitivity training and knowledge of laws governing anti gay, se x ist remarks, inappropriate touching, ra ci sm, physical and mental afflictions, and gender bias than there is in basic bullying.

Yes, but very little understanding and sensitivity to those who are transgender. Believe it or not, gender is not binary, as many of us were taught to believe. I am not talking about s--ual preference, but gender identity. People should be allowed to be who they are--as long as it's not hurting anyone--without fear of recrimination, prejudice, or violence. Yes, violence. There's quite a bit of it still towards the L-G-B-T community.

[luvingit]

I am a school counselor. I understand the school position. It is the easiest way to avoid conflict. It is difficult to handle every kid who teases this boy about his bag if there are more than a few. It becomes disruptive and takes time away from lesson time and can lead to violence on the playground and before and after school. The school could discipline every kid who teases this boy and even suspend them, but wouldn't it be simpler to leave the bag at home and the conflict is over?

It is not right that the boy get teased but this unfortunately is a part of elementary school and an ongoing problem since the beginning of time. It should not be allowed, but on the other hand, there are many ways of solving problems, too, so we can all get back to learning.

[ennui1]

On 3/18/2014 Vamp said:

Believe it or not, gender is not binary, as many of us were taught to believe.

When a baby is born, people still ask, is it a boy or a girl?

And if the boy in the OP wants to be 'rainbow,' he's going to have to learn to cope.