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Honored Contributor
Posts: 24,200
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

@cowboy sam 

 

Aw, I'm sorry to hear things haven't been going well for you.  Maybe take it easy and rest a bit.

 

As for sister, well...you know how she is and what is happening to her physically and mentally, so you have to try to let what she says not bother you.  That's hard I know, but I don't think she's completely responsible for many of her actions now from what you say. 😢

 

It's really tough getting older.  So much of our life changes.  People and things around us change, as we change ourselves.  We can only do the best we can.  I hope you have a better day today.

 

Lubs ya!

💕 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,494
Registered: ‎06-15-2015

@geezerette 

Thank you🥰 for remembering abt my sister.🤗...we-  her neighbor  and myself are doing our best  but she doesn't know how hard we are trying our best not to upset her,etc....its been a rough few days..

 

i finally caved and took" part" of my perscription med last night to help me cope...and  so" today"  so far  i am  feeling  better.

 

The friend her neighbor talks to my niece  at least once a week and gives her updates  on her mother.

 

Its getting worse  ...like other day we were talking about birthdays  and she asked me when was mine? I told her July.

 

She  also forgot   mine  last year...and i didn't even mention it.

 

Her birthay is in August   and will turn 80.and younger then me. and is expecting a big birthday party from her family.

 

Thank you for your' lubs'Heart

 

lubs ya Heart

preds 06-21-20
"Always be thankful andyou'll have more than you know."
Honored Contributor
Posts: 24,200
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

@cowboy sam 

 

Heck, don't feel badly about your sis not remembering your birthday.  I have a close friend in her 50s that asks when my birthday is every year!  Good grief! 

 

Now, I'm not the one making a big deal out of my birthday--she is!  So why can't she write it down?!  And she's always doing stuff on her phone that I have no idea about, so don't they have apps to remind you of stuff like that?

 

I finally gave up and just tell her when my birthday is...every single year.🙄

 

I take my med any night I'm feeling the need.  I did last night, in fact.  It definitely helps.  It's good that you don't overdo it, but I would use it before I got too upset.  I really think that's better for your overall health.  Especially if it helps you get some good sleep.

 

Lubs ya! 💕

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,494
Registered: ‎06-15-2015

@geezerette 

 

Thanks for the med advice...i know i should have taken that med sooner  but thought i could handle it.Smiley Sad..

 

but thank goodness i did take 1/2 of one last night  and   will continue doing so  as long as i can w/o side affects.My scrips is the lowest doseage made.

 

I never talk  about my b-days  but subject came up  Wed. when i told them my one son takes me out for lunch and shopping on Mother's Day  and on my b-day  and sis asked  me when is  it? 

 

Last year we out having lunch on my b-day  and she never mentioned it  so i didn't say anything to embarress her.

 

 

 Also i had noticed last year..her daughter  made out a daily schedual for her meds  and when to take them...plus she has notes wrote out to herself to do things then  and still does.

 

Wedneday  she told us that 

Her pharmacy called and left three  different messages  last week  to remind her her meds were ready to be picked up !...

 

She

then asked our friend to take her to walmart to get them.  after we ate our lunch out..i asked her why she didn't go get them after first   or  2 calls? 

 

She told us she forgot  about them  until 3d call  to pick them up or they would be put back on shelf.

Hard telling what else she is forgetting  and not telling us about?Smiley Sad

 

lubs ya!Heart

preds 06-21-20
"Always be thankful andyou'll have more than you know."
Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,263
Registered: ‎09-16-2010

@cowboy sam : So sorry that you are dealing with so much.

Do something to pamper yourself. Find something to savor and enjoy. Escape for a while.

Your sister is struggling and dealing with a lot. She is probably afraid and confused. I know it is difficult but you and the neighbor need to ignore what she says and try to change the subject.

We are all getting older and frustrated with our daily changes and challenges. Everyone deals with this differently. I vent, pray and read my bible and daily devotions. Trying to focus on the good and staying positive.

My precious friend that passed 5/1. Told me something when my Mom passed and I was 22. You are allowed a pitty party but set the alarm clock for 15 minutes: Cry your heart out if necessary and indulge in your favorite candy or ice cream. Then get up, get yourself up and find someone that needs some extra help, love and hugs.

From my experience and help that has been received and shared with love, understanding and kindness.🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,494
Registered: ‎06-15-2015

@SouthernBee 

Thank you

 

 

but this has nothing to do with our  ages  and we do change the subject often for my sister.

 

She is losing her frontal  memory part of her brain...and its alarming at a few things she talks about sometimes  and i'm not going elbrate..

.  Also  not anything  as she won't harm herself  as long as she isn't driving her car!

 

I will say what is really upsetting me...

Wed. after eating she told us she was going into gift part of store  and look around.

When friend  and i decided to leave they paid their bill  and i needed to wait in line.....

the cashier knows me  and asked me if she could ask me a question..?.i told her yes..

she asked me if my sister was ok/ as she was acting  very weird?

 

I then told her that she was losing her frontal  memory part of her brain....she told me ok  as she knew there was something different acting about her....i then told her that  i needed  to leave   as they were waiting on me outside.

 

Knowing now that others are have  started to noticed her change  in her talking,etc. is very,very upsetting to me...

"that means she is getting worse"  Smiley Sad

 

its beyond just her 2 daughters,her neighbor  and myself knowing.

 

 

lubs ya!Heart

preds 06-21-20
"Always be thankful andyou'll have more than you know."
Honored Contributor
Posts: 24,200
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

@cowboy sam 

 

Aw, I can see why you're so upset and concerned.  If others have noticed, I'm sure your sister has noticed herself she's not the same.  She probably has many emotions going on inside.

 

Unfortunately unless she wants to do something about it, or her daughters take over, you know there isn't anything more you can do.  And she seems to have the type of personality that will not be easy to deal with as this progresses.  I suppose all you can do is keep a close eye on her when you're out together and let her daughters know if and when she's getting worse.  If you're not up to dealing with her, maybe you and you friend could plan some outings without her.

 

This is really hard when this is your own sister and you know it's only going to go downhill from here.  It's just sad when at this point in your lives you should be getting closer together rather than drifting apart.  Sad that when we get older we lose so many that were close to us in one way or another.  Even though many of us go through it, it hurts.  And it's okay to be sad about it.

 

Lubs ya!

 

💕

Honored Contributor
Posts: 24,200
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

@SouthernBee 

Your friend was a very wise woman.

 

And you are too.  And very kind and considerate too.

 

❤️

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,263
Registered: ‎09-16-2010

@cowboy sam : So sorry. 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,433
Registered: ‎05-22-2014

@cowboy sam 

 

You have gotten some excellent advice here to help you dealing with your sister's issues.  It is certainly a challenge to deal with, but her daughters are the people who should be taking responsibility for her care.  It is a very helpless situation for you, but continue to do the best you can.

 

When people we love lose some of their mental abilities, it is 

always a very sad thing.  And made even worse when those who should do not.

 

I am so sorry you have to deal with this.  I hope you can start to limit how often you see her, for your own good.

 

Lubs ya!