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Frequent Contributor
Posts: 111
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.

OH HELL NO ............ I've said that many times  .......... then at times I have used ........

 

What part of NO  or NOT INTERESTED ... did you not understand? ..... lol

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,736
Registered: ‎02-19-2014

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.

I'd just tell her, "I'm not on the market right now. I'm not available." Then the day after the party, you put yourself back on the market. You're allowed to consider yourself unavailable whenever you want, for whatever reason you want, and for however long (or short) you want.

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,245
Registered: ‎04-16-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.


@CrazyKittyLvr2 wrote:

@RetRN  Why is he going to be there is what I asked another friend.

 

It seems when his last woman dumped him they lived in her house in another town 40 or 50 miles from my hometown.

 

Of course sis took him in and then we all got stay at home orders.

 

She does need her own life but she, and the rest of the family, have coddled him his whole life.

 

I'm not worried about him as much as her.  I doubt he would go for a nearly 70 yr. old somewhat overweight woman.  Besides, I don't coddle, he would be sorely disappointed.


 

@Retired Legal Secretary, I just read this and thought the first part of your last sentence said "I don't cuddle."

Honored Contributor
Posts: 28,291
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.

In my many years I have developed a NO that will stop a freight trane or a furniture salesman in their tracks.  Doc Martin would be envious of my no.  It is a NO that not another word will follow and everyone in the room understands that or they get THE LOOK.  And that, my dear, shuts them up. 

 

You have time to practice!  DO SO!  NOW!  Woman Wink

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,640
Registered: ‎05-13-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.

@CrazyKittyLvr2 You don't need this carp.  If you wish to attend, have a phrase ready to repeat and repeat.  I would just say that I haven't decided to date yet, same phrase over and over--no explanation.

 

I know it is not easy to be harsh sometimes, but that phrase is pretty neutral.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,889
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.


@chiclets wrote:

This get together is already uncomfortable for you and seems to be a situation where you would be looking to dodge some people, and explaining your position to some others.Could you have a good time then if you went?

You mentioned you are not comfortable in crowds yet and so that is another thing you should consider.

 

Why go, go to another one.

 

No is no, and you do not need to explain your position over, and over again.

 

I have no tolerance for this sort of thing and would walk away from it. Friends accept a friend as they are and need not agree with everything they do and do not pester a friend concerning a choice or a no.

 


I agree.  She said she's not sure she's ready to be in a large group.  I feel the same way, so this would be a hard pass for me.  (Especially with this added annoyance.)

 

As for the added annoyance, I would firmly say that I'm not interested.  End of story.  It makes no sense to give reasons or explain.  It's not up for discussion.  I would politely but firmly say that.  If someone is a good friend, they'll respect it.  If not, then I don't need them in my life.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,889
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.


@CrazyKittyLvr2 wrote:

@SXMGirl  I'm going to see how I feel about going in a couple days.

 

I can have a mouth if someone starts getting snippy with me or really nasty. But I never want to hurt someone's feelings. I can usually find a way to say something that's not mean or jusr blunt but this time I'm stumped.

 

I know she adores him and is proud of him but he is just not the "catch" she thinks he is.  That catch has been thrown back too many times.


 

It doesn't matter if you think he's a catch or not, or if she thinks he is, or if someone else might, or if she adores him.   I don't understand the point of rehashing it over and over, even in your own mind.  

 

Maybe there are posters here who would meet him and love him, maybe other peoople would see redeeming qualities.  But it doesn't matter.  You're not interested.  That's the bottom line.  Make that clear, and move on with your life.  You have every right to do that without having to rationalize or explain.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,889
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.


@Deree wrote:

Like @hckynut said I have no problem saying no with a smile.  If the person takes offense or gets angry so be it. Then they weren't anyone that important to me. I'm too old for games.  I'm direct and if you don't like it too bad.  No explanation required.


 

Communication is everything!  If I feel strongly about something, I speak up and make it clear.  If someone was pushy with me about something like this, I would say, "I'm not interested.  And I'm not discussing it anymore."  

 

And then I wouldn't discuss it anymore!   Done.  No explanations, because that just opens up a conversation with questions, analyses and proposed compromises.  I already said no.  And I meant it.  

 

 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,813
Registered: ‎03-17-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.

@CrazyKittyLvr2 Sounds like he's a real "catch"-- If you want to be a meal ticket. 

Just say Thank you but no, case closed, and enjoy your friends. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,627
Registered: ‎04-28-2010

Re: People Who Won't Take No For An Answer.

@SunSprite   oh, that was my mother’s favorite words when I said why not as a kid.  When I would then ask dad, he said go ask your mother.  She always won.  Hahaha