Community Chat

[Baileybut]

Yes this aggravates me too! My husband's family never sends thank you. When my niece graduated high school we could not attend party since husband had surgery and came home from hospital day party was. I mailed card and check and never heard in two months from my niece. Called mother in law whom lives nearby to them. She asked my sister in law why they didn't send thank you. Sister in law reply was " who sends thank you cards, you open the card and throw it in trash any way! Unreal! Entire family no thank you cards for showers, birthdays, graduation and etc. When I vent to hubby he tells me that's how that are don't make big deal out of it! My family we were raised exact opposite! 

[ROMARY]

There is another thread on Among Friends ( 'Wedding thank you'.)........where I just posted my thoughts.  It's all about what their parents taught or hadn't taught their youngsters at a young age.  A simple, genuine, natural 'thank you' and a smile doesn't cost a dime...........

[Irshgrl31201]

---

@JBKO wrote:

Sydney H says she can think of bigger pet peeves. I believe that the simple act of saying thank you is a "building block" of sorts. It is a reflection of what is to come. People who have gratitude and can empathize and appreciate  don't go on to do the things that may be "bigger pet peeves'.

My goodness the thank you note. If someone spends such a high amount of the money they worked long hours for, the least you can do is send a nice thank you note. Basamec is totally right. I bought A nice little set of thank you notes not too long ago just in case.

---

Oh geez, I misread Sydneys posts, I thought she said I can't think of a bigger pet peeve! I completely agree with you that it is most definitely a building block. It is most definitely a reflection. I can't tell you the number of times my daughter would have one of her friends sleep over night and not a please or thank you to be heard after I took them out for dinner or to a movie, even after my daughter told me thank you. The kid would just sit there with a blank stare. I am sorry but people who were raised with manners knows that reflects badly upon the parents. Teachers, employers and other parents notice that stuff right away!

I also agree about the Thank you notes! After you recieve those gifts for a baby shower, bridal shower or wedding, that should be one of the first things you do. I don't agree with the nonsense they should have a year to do it either!

[GingerPeach]

---

@JBKO wrote:

Sydney H says she can think of bigger pet peeves. I believe that the simple act of saying thank you is a "building block" of sorts. It is a reflection of what is to come. People who have gratitude and can empathize and appreciate  don't go on to do the things that may be "bigger pet peeves'.

My goodness the thank you note. If someone spends such a high amount of the money they worked long hours for, the least you can do is send a nice thank you note. Basamec is totally right. I bought A nice little set of thank you notes not too long ago just in case.

---

And the fact that you took time to acknowledge another poster by name instead of just writing "someone" or "another poster" also shows that you care about people, @JBKO

[tedEbear]

  When someone forgets to say "ThankYou", I just say real loud "You're welcome"!!!!  The "have a good one", one of these days I'm going to ask "a good what? Accident?".  Really irritating!!!!-----tedEbear

[Irshgrl31201]

---

@Baileybut wrote:

Yes this aggravates me too! My husband's family never sends thank you. When my niece graduated high school we could not attend party since husband had surgery and came home from hospital day party was. I mailed card and check and never heard in two months from my niece. Called mother in law whom lives nearby to them. She asked my sister in law why they didn't send thank you. Sister in law reply was " who sends thank you cards, you open the card and throw it in trash any way! Unreal! Entire family no thank you cards for showers, birthdays, graduation and etc. When I vent to hubby he tells me that's how that are don't make big deal out of it! My family we were raised exact opposite! 

---

Oh, they would be completely off my gift/card/anything list!!

[bamasec]

---

@Irshgrl31201 wrote:

I agree with both @JBKO and @SydneyH!! To me, this is without a doubt my number one pet peeve. 

My daughter is now 26 soon to be 27 and she has been saying yes ma'am, yes sir, please and thank you since she was 2. It was the first thing I taught her. My grandson will be 2 in July and has been saying all of the above for about 2 months. At first we always prompted him with saying please when he was asking for or wanting something. We had to do it over and over but I noticed about a month ago, he does it all by himself without being prompted!! I praised him like crazy and he was so proud of himself, that sweet little guy!! The past week or two he started saying thank you without being prompted when he gets something he has asked for. It makes me proud and people notice. When we have been out to eat he has said thank you several times to the server after he gets his drink or food. When he says it the server or person he says it to, have made a big deal out of it too telling him what a good boy he was. He just grins from ear to ear. 

It is such a simple thing that requires no money or personal sacrifice but means so much and SHOWS so much about your upbringing and you as a person. 

I have noticed (as I did when my daughter was younger) that some parents don't require this at all and when I have spent time with them on play dates when I have my grandson, they don't encourage their child to say please or thank you when they should. This bothers me. One friend of mine that I got together with on a play date with my grandson and her 3 1/2 yr old daughter even told me he was too young to be learning or saying that and he was just a kid and I shouldn't be pushing him like that. I really let her know how I feel, I told her that too young ****** was nonsense and a child should be taught manners as soon as they can talk and even before. I do know the reason she said that though, my grandson said thank you when he received his food when we went out to eat with them and I know it embarrassed her because her child said nothing and when my grandson said thank you the server really went nuts saying over and over how polite he was. I am pretty sure my friend felt shown up. Plain and simple. 

Anyhow, I am completely with you and I think it is VITAL that children learn that as soon as possible. I cringe when people don't do it themselves in front of their children and show a good example!!

---

FANTASTIC POST AND YOU ARE SO RIGHT IN MY OPINION!                                             bamasec

[JBKO]

It is so cute when little children around 2 or 3 love saying thank you to whoever for any little thing. Us adults love it even more and commend them for it making it a positive association for them from such an early age. I remember these adorable little twin boys on the train who you could tell immediately were taught the importance of thank you. They kept saying it all the time and it never got tiring!

[Chrystaltree2]

I must live in the polite part of the country, I haven't noticed a lack of "thank you" when it's called for.  

[Irshgrl31201]

---

@bamasec wrote:

---

@JBKO wrote:

To me it is like flushing the toilet--I do it naturally. I am finding that more and more people do not function like this. Is it because we live in a world where we have so much instant gratification that we come to expect everything from others without showing any gratitude? The worst is when they don't say thank you and there are children around. They are setting a bad example right before your eyes. I had a nasty customer service represtantative on the line yesterday and I still thanked her for helping me ( I kind of did set her straight during our coversation though lol). I don't care if you wear white after labor  day or even wear birkenstocks with socks what bothers me is when people don't say thank you!

---

I am so with you on this topic. I am so totally fed up with people who cannot take 10 minutes to write a thank you note it just makes me want to scream!

I have spent so much money on wedding gifts for girls without receiving a thank you note, that I have actually called the bride after 3 to 4 months to see if she received the gift. How do I know if the department store got the gift out to her and she actually received the gift? The brides make sure they get that invitation off in time for the wedding, but do not have the class to write a note.

This is not the majority of the women but I would say at least four to five out of ten this has happened over the years. And this is not just for brides. I mean luncheons, any kind of gift, and I do not care the price, 5.00 or 50.00, show your class if you have any, and take the time to write a thank you note. Not an e-mail. Write!

Thanks for letting me vent.                         bamasec

---

@bamasec, first of all thank you!!! I couldn't agree more with you. I cannot believe a bride would not send those out. I do hear they have a year and I think that is way too long! What did she say when you called her? Did she seem embarrassed that you actually had to call her to see if she received your gift? She should have been. I would die of embarrassment if someone had to call me and ask if I had received a gift that they took the time to pick out!