Community Chat

[Shanus]

---

@dex wrote:

@Shanus She probably thought that you always had everything under control and didn't need her help.Maybe she worried that she couldn't cook food as well as you.Seems she has now gotten the confidence to try to put on the whole dinner.I think that it would be really nice if you could offer to assist her in anyway and see what she would like you to bring.It is always best to work towards a good relationship with the DIL.

---

@dex  Good suggestion & kindly expressed.

[faeriemoon]

---

@Bri36 wrote:

I would offer to make/bring something and bring a bottle of wine.

---

---

@Bri36 wrote:

I would offer to make/bring something and bring a bottle of wine.

---

Ditto!!!

[Kitlynn]

I would be grateful that the daughter in law is doing dinner this year and I would also be the bigger person and bring a side dish along with a bottle of wine. I would check with her to make sure I didn't bring a side that she was already making. Some people just don't think about offering to bring a dish when they are invited for a holiday meal. They just think that the person who is hosting will already have their meal planned. They also think if the host wanted them to bring something they would ask. So maybe that is why she hasn't ever brought anything to your dinners.

[lulu1]

---

@Shanus wrote:

My DIL is making thanksgiving dinner this year. In all the years I’ve had the dinner at my house, she never offered to bring dessert or a side dish.

Should I just bring a bottle of wine?

---

@Shanus

I'd ask if I could bring something.  If she says no, bring some wine. (I prefer bubbly)

When I host holiday dinners, I prefer to make all courses myself.

[sunshine45]

bring whatever you wish to bring.....bottle of wine, side dish, dessert. i am sure it will be appreciated by many. if you dont wish to bring anything, then dont.

[annie315]

Something I try to live by, "Model the behavior you expect"

[Cakers3]

---

@Shanus wrote:

My DIL is making thanksgiving dinner this year. In all the years I’ve had the dinner at my house, she never offered to bring dessert or a side dish.

Should I just bring a bottle of wine?

---

@Shanus  I think wine can be a touchy item-especially if nobody drinks OR drinks to excess.  Some have distinctive tastes in wine, too.

I was taught never to attend an invite by walking in with one arm as long as the other.

Certainly you can say "I have a special dessert I like to make for the holidays-would it be ok to bring it?"

Or bring a hostess gift-even if it is a bouquet of flowers (make sure in a vase).

[Love my grandkids]

Ask her

[summerwind]

Along the lines others here have suggested: Offer to bring a favorite family dish, particularly if it's something she's enjoyed in the past.

[Group 5 minus 1]

lovemygrands: what about diabetics?