Community Chat

[JoyFilled Warrior]

Hi @Forum_Friends

EACH & EVERY person, without fail, who comes into my home, (whether I know them well, or a relative stranger),  help themselves, man-handle my home's items.  They pick them up, look them over more closely, & shake them, or smell them, whichever seems indicated. 

      Often they say:  "I could really use this item." Like my home is some kind of Gift Shop! 

My mouth drops open, in shock, EVERY TIME.  

You'd think Id get used to this, but instead, it continues to shock me!  The "Entitlement" they think they have!

This never, ever fails with a visitor!

Now, granted, I do have some nice, sometimes innovative items, or items I've taken great care of.

But,  I was raised, certainly, NEVER to help ourselves, & pick up, handle, inspect a person's home items, (let alone also say "I could really use this item.")

One person came here, who I know, & as I was in the kitchen, making us a Cappuccino, she'd reached over, apparently helping herself to my HSN wig boxes, & *BAM* tipped over my remaining 2 other wig boxes. No apology.  Not embarrassed, what so ever.  As if, ENTITLED.

2 days ago, the 2 young girls I pay to empty trash, picked up a flowered, sachet envelope on the desk beside my front door.  Shaking it, Smelling it.  She hugged it, as if intending to walk away with it. Then she picked up the remaining one & handed it to her nearby cousin, at her elbow,  who hesitated, then hugged the sachet she'd given to her.  The audacity! Shocked, yet again, my mouth dropped. 

Overnight, I hung up "TOUCH NOTHING" signs all over items here.   Made no difference!

When the same 2 young girls came over again today, the cousin helped herself to the exact same kind of, newly replaced, sachet envelope on the table beside the door.  She helped herself to it, smelling it again.  I looked at her & pointed to the nearby sign that reads, "TOUCH NOTHING." 

    She was OFFENDED!!  Giving me Attitude - Like touching, picking up my items was her birth right;  My obligation to let her! 

    I asked her,, "what'd you do with the one you already have?"  She said, "It's on my dresser."  I felt like saying:  "Well go smell your own!  Leave my own remaining one alone!"

Is this the norm now, in society? 

And     NO  "PLEASE"  &    NO  "THANK YOU"

And    NO   "APOLOGIZE"   any more.

       ~  ~  ENTITLEMENT?  ~  ~

No embarrassment?     No shame?    No hesitation?

(Ppl coming over yr home, helping themselves, to lift up, & pick over your house items, (plus, often saying, "I could really use this."))  

   And they give back "Attitude" when they're caught, deterred, or denied!

Does facsimile above ever happen to you??

Do you notice any exhibited increase in *ENTITLEMENT*   in ppl now?  TIA

[Love my grandkids]

@JoyFilled Warrior Instead of telling US this stuff, you need to act like an adult and tell them, loudly, to LEAVE MY STUFF THE HECK ALONE and demand those girls return the **stolen** items. You are a grown woman and need to act like one.

And pointing at a sign means nothing.

Maybe stop letting so many people in your home and tell THEM to knock it off too.

And I would fire those 2 thieving girls and tell them why. Are you grown up enough to do that? I know you think you are helping them but now they are stealing from you.

What are you gonna do?

[monicakm]

@JoyFilled Warrior 

there is a huge problem in this country concerning entitlement but no, I have never had anyone come into my home and treat it with anything other than respect... that's not entirely true. My grandson can Trash the place up pretty good.

Why did you let the girl walk out of your house with your sachet? Have you told her to bring it back? I'm sure if she had asked you would have probably let her have one but not asking is reason enough to tell her to bring it back.  Most don't seem to care about manners anymore and most parents don't seem to care about disciplining their children anymore.

[cindyNC]

That same behavior drives us crazy w/the BF's grandkids.  We have taken to removing items we prefer they not touch or walk off with. 

The first time it happend, their mother said she found money in her daughter's pockets.  My BF empties coins from his pockets into little containers in the kitchen.  They have snooped thru closets looking for items that I often have on hand when they visit and always assume that whatever they find is theirs to take home....even if they already have the same item at home. 

They are a bit older now, so it happens less and less often. 

[Love my grandkids]

@monicakm I don't think "most" kids are the subject of bad parenting. I don't like sweeping generalizations. My son and his wife raised kind, polite, young adult children. I know many younger people who are equally nice and respectful. Sorry it sounds like you don't and that's too bad.

[deeva]

I've never experienced anything like you're describing. 
Plus, I don't have people coming in and out of my house on a regular basis. 

When my grandkids were little, anything I didn't want them to touch, I put out of their reach. 

[Kachina624]

@JoyFilled Warrior. You must have some interesting objects sitting out in your public areas.  As I see it, your choices are to remove these objects and display them in bedrooms with closed doors.

Or quit allowing these ill-mannered people into your home.  Get some backbone and tell newcomers you have some fragile items that they shouldn't touch.  If they want to see something, they should tell you and you'll show it to them.

Just remember, your house, your rules, but it's up to you to enforce them.  Violators don't come back.

[Group 5 minus 1]

Haven't heard the term,"gives attitude" in years.

[QVCkitty1]

I think there is a sense of entitlement among all ages. The daughter of a friend , who is a server, tells me stories about customers who treat her like a servant and their behavior is appalling. 

[shoesnbags]

@JoyFilled Warrior 

No, I've never had this problem because I control who comes into my house, not the other way around.  If someone picked up something they shouldn't I would immediately tell them to put it down. If it happened again, that person would never be allowed inside my house again.  I can't imagine being so timid in my own home that I would let people handle things they shouldn't and even steal them.  Good grief.