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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,043
Registered: ‎04-16-2013

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

There are many life situations that cannot compare to this, but that does not negate that this carrier should have known the postal rules and regulations and chose to break them.

I think we all understand that some things in life are more horrific than others-- but that does not mean that we should ignore everything but THE worst of things.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,320
Registered: ‎10-21-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 TheKingsMistress said:
On 7/24/2014 glb613 said:
On 7/23/2014 momma3gs said:

It was not a jury notice where I had to appear for duty, it was merely a questionnaire to determine my eligibility to serve. A two page form from the US District Court. Even if it had been a jury notification, it was none of her business and she should not have delivered to a neighbor, especially when the post office had my cell number on the hold mail request.

That is how I know what her intentions were. It piqued her interest because it came from a court, she pulled it from the rest of the mail and delivered it to my nosy neighbor.

The rest of my neighbors are wonderful and we all watch out for each other when we're gone. I know what this was about because I know the individuals.

If you don't like what she did, go to the post office and complain. If you don't do something then shut up about it.

Nah, she'd rather berate anyone who disagrees with her in cyberworld rather than resolving the issue with the mail carrier.

Why be so mean? She was posting about a situation on Viewpoints..venting so to speak..and people gave their point of view..no need to be nasty to the OP.. Why tell people to shut up? Why can't she come here and vent ..put her on ignore if you dont like her but you are doing the same thing you are accusing her of. You would rather berate her then ignore her.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 2,146
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 Complicated said:

There are many life situations that cannot compare to this, but that does not negate that this carrier should have known the postal rules and regulations and chose to break them.

I think we all understand that some things in life are more horrific than others-- but that does not mean that we should ignore everything but THE worst of things.

Amen!!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,781
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

Mom, That was a real breach of the letter carrier's duties. I have a gossipy postman, too, and there's nothing to be done about it.

They're like journalists (I used to work with a lot of journalists). They _get_ nosey if they were not born that way.

She has received a snub for now, and you can talk to her privately when you return. If you go up a notch and talk to a supervisor, she might get fired.

Super Contributor
Posts: 1,680
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 Jannabelle said:
On 7/24/2014 letsmoveon said:

seems there are a lot of assumptions being made so I had to re-read the original post. Why is it women always have to assume the worst and then make a big deal out of it calling for someone's head? /the mail carrier did not open the mail, she merely saw the outgoing address and perhaps ASSUMED that it was important mail and maybe shouldn't be held as it might be time sensitive. She made a call on that and again maybe thought giving it to a neighbor who could reach you was just trying to be civil, not nosey, not trying to start up trouble, just going out of her way. See, your husband said let it go and IMO most men would not read anything into this scenario and make it more than it is/was.

As for your neighbor, your post stated that she and the mail carrier talk and have some kind of chatty relationship that involves gossip. You again,OP, assumed something stating you just know your neighbor would have loved for you to say to you to open it so she could see what it was about. I am a firm believer that it is not what it said, it is who is saying it and your post seems to suggest you don't like the neighbor or the mail carrier.

Of course she would not get fired over this because she would say the letter looked uber important and she thought she might be doing a good deed for someone on her route wgo was away. May mail carrier is new and I have gotten to know her because I sit outside with my pets often and she was afraid at first and has now gotten to know them as friendly. I feel that in these past few weeks if she saw something important to be delivered and hadn't seen me in awhile, she might inquire from a neighbor and ask them if they could reach me to advise me of the item.

I have been studying a lot of Buddhism lately and feel that too many people are misguided by pre-conceived notions and thoughts that they think are valid in their minds and then ascribe those notions to others., Many times an incident like this one are nothing more than a random act by someone who thought they were doing a good deed. Not something to make a stink about and get someone fired.

Wow, I always assumed, that mail carriers were way too busy to look at personal mail and discern whether it was important or not, and worry about someone getting in trouble if she did not deliver the mail (that was requested to be held.)

My mail carrier is way too busy. He's on a strict schedule just like the postal workers at the PO.

I always thought it was illegal to knowingly deliver mail to a person other than the one it was intended for.

Super Contributor
Posts: 794
Registered: ‎08-16-2013

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 letsmoveon said:
On 7/24/2014 JuJu Squeezie said:

Back in the 80's I lived on base, felt comfortable leaving the front door open with a screen door over it. I had a mailman who would come to the screen, call us for mail and talk. I was younger and more trusting and then learned to keep the darn door shut. I actually saw him giving a neighbor lady a couple of massages. It took him a long time to get down the street stopping at ever open door he could find. He had a story for every lady. One day he vanished. Every time I hear "Smooth Operator" I think of him.

He just loved my "Big Brown Eyes"...right.

this had absolutely no relevance to this thread at all.

Then you should have and could have ignored it.

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,527
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 letsmoveon said:

seems there are a lot of assumptions being made so I had to re-read the original post. Why is it women always have to assume the worst and then make a big deal out of it calling for someone's head? /the mail carrier did not open the mail, she merely saw the outgoing address and perhaps ASSUMED that it was important mail and maybe shouldn't be held as it might be time sensitive. She made a call on that and again maybe thought giving it to a neighbor who could reach you was just trying to be civil, not nosey, not trying to start up trouble, just going out of her way. See, your husband said let it go and IMO most men would not read anything into this scenario and make it more than it is/was.

As for your neighbor, your post stated that she and the mail carrier talk and have some kind of chatty relationship that involves gossip. You again,OP, assumed something stating you just know your neighbor would have loved for you to say to you to open it so she could see what it was about. I am a firm believer that it is not what it said, it is who is saying it and your post seems to suggest you don't like the neighbor or the mail carrier.

Of course she would not get fired over this because she would say the letter looked uber important and she thought she might be doing a good deed for someone on her route wgo was away. May mail carrier is new and I have gotten to know her because I sit outside with my pets often and she was afraid at first and has now gotten to know them as friendly. I feel that in these past few weeks if she saw something important to be delivered and hadn't seen me in awhile, she might inquire from a neighbor and ask them if they could reach me to advise me of the item.

I have been studying a lot of Buddhism lately and feel that too many people are misguided by pre-conceived notions and thoughts that they think are valid in their minds and then ascribe those notions to others., Many times an incident like this one are nothing more than a random act by someone who thought they were doing a good deed. Not something to make a stink about and get someone fired.

Hmmm....also some assumptions being made here.

And...the mail carrier did wrong - no matter what her intentions were and no matter of any relationships among the neighbor/mail carrier/OP.

The OP put a hold on her mail. The carrier did not abide by the rules.

The OP was not suggesting she be fired...in fact she said she didn't want the carrier's job jeopardized.

The OP was asking for opinions, so that's why many different ways of looking at this were posted.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 2,146
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 ------ said:
On 7/24/2014 Jannabelle said:
On 7/24/2014 letsmoveon said:

seems there are a lot of assumptions being made so I had to re-read the original post. Why is it women always have to assume the worst and then make a big deal out of it calling for someone's head? /the mail carrier did not open the mail, she merely saw the outgoing address and perhaps ASSUMED that it was important mail and maybe shouldn't be held as it might be time sensitive. She made a call on that and again maybe thought giving it to a neighbor who could reach you was just trying to be civil, not nosey, not trying to start up trouble, just going out of her way. See, your husband said let it go and IMO most men would not read anything into this scenario and make it more than it is/was.

As for your neighbor, your post stated that she and the mail carrier talk and have some kind of chatty relationship that involves gossip. You again,OP, assumed something stating you just know your neighbor would have loved for you to say to you to open it so she could see what it was about. I am a firm believer that it is not what it said, it is who is saying it and your post seems to suggest you don't like the neighbor or the mail carrier.

Of course she would not get fired over this because she would say the letter looked uber important and she thought she might be doing a good deed for someone on her route wgo was away. May mail carrier is new and I have gotten to know her because I sit outside with my pets often and she was afraid at first and has now gotten to know them as friendly. I feel that in these past few weeks if she saw something important to be delivered and hadn't seen me in awhile, she might inquire from a neighbor and ask them if they could reach me to advise me of the item.

I have been studying a lot of Buddhism lately and feel that too many people are misguided by pre-conceived notions and thoughts that they think are valid in their minds and then ascribe those notions to others., Many times an incident like this one are nothing more than a random act by someone who thought they were doing a good deed. Not something to make a stink about and get someone fired.

Wow, I always assumed, that mail carriers were way too busy to look at personal mail and discern whether it was important or not, and worry about someone getting in trouble if she did not deliver the mail (that was requested to be held.)

My mail carrier is way too busy. He's on a strict schedule just like the postal workers at the PO.

I always thought it was illegal to knowingly deliver mail to a person other than the one it was intended for.

Me too, I wished someone who knows for sure would chime in....I have never heard of anything like this.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,424
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

If you complain to the Post Office about your mail carrier. You will never get important mail when you are not home. MYOB.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 2,146
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Need advice re gossipy mail carrier

On 7/24/2014 nutmeg3 said:

If you complain to the Post Office about your mail carrier. You will never get important mail when you are not home. MYOB.

Mind your own business? Really? If I were her, I would think my mail is my business.