Reply
Honored Contributor
Posts: 21,477
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@mominohio wrote:

My mom and I didn't start out as best friends, she insisted she was my mother, not my friend. And I'm glad she did.

 

Girls and teens don't need a best friend nearly as much as they need a mom who will keep them on track. 

 

As we've aged, we are more like friends, but still there is a mother/daughter dynamic that is much more needed by both of us, than the friendship.

 

Either way, she is the strongest, most stable and dependable person in my life. Always has been. Always will be.


As much as your post makes me aware of that gaping hole in my life, I don't at all begrudge you or others as fortunate as you expressing such sentiments.

 

@mominohio


~Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,863
Registered: ‎08-19-2014

Re: NO TRUER WORDS

[ Edited ]

 So true!!  I had a wonderful mother.I miss her every day.She taught me by example how to be the wife & mother I am today!!

   I can’t imagine what my life would have been like without her unconditional love & support!!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,872
Registered: ‎05-18-2017
I always wish I had a sister. My mom passed 2005. I have a brother, but we’re not close.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,872
Registered: ‎05-18-2017
Those words are not true for everyone.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,104
Registered: ‎06-10-2010

I realize these words may not ring true for everyone.  I empathize with that.  I do think, however, it's best not to rain on someones parade whom these words do ring true to.  We can be happy for those that were fortunate to have such a mother....even if we didn't.  While some may say, "this is easy for you to say because you had a loving mother"....that would be true....and it would be my hope that you would be as happy for me as I am sad for you.  I don't know, it just feels to me like we are stealing someone's joy when we do this.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,739
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I don't thinik anyone is trying to steal other peoples joy. Some of our posters have really suffered at the hands of abusive parents. It is like crowing about a wonderful meal, when someone else is starving. I had wonderful parents, but ,the pain of those who didn't, follows them for their entire life, and they have to live with it.

 

We have some posters here who have really been through the mill...

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,951
Registered: ‎03-10-2013

@151949 wrote:

When I hear the song "The Dance" by Garth Brooks I always relate it to my parents. They have been gone 27 years now and it is still an ache in my heart. 

"I could have missed the pain , but I would have had to miss the dance."


That’s my favorite Garth song too. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,602
Registered: ‎06-14-2016

My relationship with my mother was not always good.  But with age and learning MY boundries and limits things are better.  Some people you have to love from a distance and on "your" schedule to avoid conflict.

 

I also envy those who had the "great" mother daughter relationships.

Happiness is ALWAYS an inside job,
Don't assign anyone else that much POWER
in your life!!!
Valued Contributor
Posts: 863
Registered: ‎03-29-2015

Re: NO TRUER WORDS

[ Edited ]

@cherry wrote:

I don't thinik anyone is trying to steal other peoples joy. Some of our posters have really suffered at the hands of abusive parents. It is like crowing about a wonderful meal, when someone else is starving. I had wonderful parents, but ,the pain of those who didn't, follows them for their entire life, and they have to live with it.

 

We have some posters here who have really been through the mill...


 

I don't understand what you are saying.  The approved topics of conversation are getting more and more limited on this board and your post seems to imply that something as innocent as  " Hey, I just found a great new recipe for Lobster Mac n Cheese" may hurt someone who a) can't afford to buy lobster: b) is allergic to cheese; or c) has celiac disease and can't eat the macaroni.  

 

I  think posters here take things way to personally.

 

Sometimes it is just a post not an attempt to wound someone.

25/45
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,034
Registered: ‎12-16-2011

Re: NO TRUER WORDS

[ Edited ]

There are people in this world that simply suck. Some of these people become parents. Half of those people are female meaning that there are mothers who suck.

 

I've dislike my mother tremendously since I was 3 years old. I knew from a very early age that I didn't want to be anything like her. When we were 7 my cousin turned to me and said "wow your mom is so mean". He has no idea how him saying that made me realize that I wasn't going insane--I wasn't the only one who sensed that her attitude was unacceptable. 

 

I can't say that my mother is my best friend--I cannot talk to her about 95% of topics because I will be judged harshly. I don't want anything bad to happen to her and I will always help her if she needs it, but for my own happiness, I cannot be close to her. I've finally accepted that I need to keep my distance if I want to happy in this life.

A friend in need is a friend indeed.