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Super Contributor
Posts: 278
Registered: ‎06-14-2012
Hello, I've never posted in viewpoints before but I was looking for some objective opinions about a situation, My son and his wife both work and his MIL watches their 2 kids during the day. The oldest is 4 and youngest under 11 months. His mother in law is about 59 years old. Well the situation is, twice now my son has come home early from work and found his MIL asleep downstairs with the baby and his 4 year old upstairs alone. The first time, he came home and walked directly upstairs to his 4 year old making a lot of noise so she would wake up. Today, she bragged that her and the baby slept until 11:30 while the 4 year old was upstairs watching tv. I have a problem with this and so does he. He actually has not confronted her about it as it is a very uncomfortable situation for him. He did mention it to his wife and her only comment was that her mother told her that he would tell her she was sleeping on the job. Is this acceptable behavior in your opinion? I don't know maybe I'm overreacting here. I know that I used to watch my daughters kids who are basically the same age and would NEVER do that. I'm really just looking for some objective opinions here since I already don't really like this woman I think maybe I'm over reacting. Thoughts?
Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,039
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Children that age need to be monitored closely. Do we know why the mother is sleeping in the daytime?

Super Contributor
Posts: 622
Registered: ‎11-13-2010

If I were you, I'd stay out of it! Unless you want to watch the grands yourself, & have them fire the other grandmother. :,)

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,829
Registered: ‎03-18-2010

I would be very upset. A 4 yr old can get into a lot of dangerous things. I wouldn't be able to keep quiet if I were the parent.

Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.
JFK
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,084
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Unacceptable. Time to hire new daycare.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,953
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

I'd worry, too.

I don't know what to tell you, but imo kids that age need someone around who's awake. A good situation would be having a sitter who was engaged with them, especially in a learning situation or physical activity... not someone who thought babysitting means long naps while a toddler and a four year old basically care for themselves.

A Thrill Of Hope The Weary World Rejoices
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 3,697
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

That sounds like a dangerous situation. A four year old could get into many dangerous situations if he's not monitored. Would your DIL put up with a day care provider sleeping while she watched children.

It's always a victory for me when I remember why I entered a room.
Super Contributor
Posts: 1,315
Registered: ‎09-15-2012

Your son and daughter need to discuss this situation together. first. After they've agreed on how to approach his MIL, they should then discuss the matter with her.

Super Contributor
Posts: 1,456
Registered: ‎11-04-2013

No, it is not acceptable behavior. Why haven't they hired a nanny or put your grandchildren in day care if they both work?

I have seen a lot of grown kids use their parents for babysitting and a lot of my friends complain about it just being too much on them. Maybe this is proof that she is just not up to caring for two young children.

Why is your son and daughter in law not hiring an appropriate caretaker for your two young grandchildren? The MIL is clearly not safe to leave the children with.....

Super Contributor
Posts: 622
Registered: ‎11-13-2010
On 3/24/2014 CardinalGirl_ said:

Unacceptable. Time to hire new daycare.

I wonder if the grandmother is charging for her services? Probably not.