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05-07-2016 08:28 AM
My dear Mom went to heaven over six years ago. I miss her so much.
I could go on and on about her good qualities. She was a rock. Loved to bake, and every night there was a wonderful dessert. Very devoted to her family and her faith. An immaculate person, a fashionista, loved the color red, and so many seemingly small things come flooding back to me. When my Dad has a massive heart attack at 60, she quit her job and took such devoted and patient care of him. Dad died at 64. She never once complained.
She had perfect health until her late 80s. But then everything went wrong, very quickly. Unfortunately due to her declining health and hospitalizations, she had to go to a nursing home. I had just retired - and would have if I had not. I saw her very often, and found ways to try to make her happy. She still loved pretty clothes, and I manicured her nails for her. So many talks about good times. My SB and I were her advocates. But she developed dementia, was good in the morning, but very confused around lunchtime on. She lasted two and a half years there, but then her doctors told us she was "actively dying."
She was in Hospice care and passed peacefully. Inasmuch as this all was a terrible time, it gave me a chance to actively give back to her. Every holiday we had a special party there, as she was too frail to leave. She lived to see her first grandchild. We have a picture of her holding him in her lap, which we entitled "Joy," because of very happy smile. We arranged a very large birthday party for her when she turned 90, and she was thrilled. That whole to,e in my life was devoted to her. My turn to give back just a little. Oh, she loved her coffee.
Every morning, when I have my coffee, I say "To you, Mom." I did miss her more when my DD got married, and when my GD was born.
But in my heart, I am convinced she is in heaven, watching over us. I am sorry if this is depressing, but sometimes a lot of good comes from bad times. Give your Mom a huge hug if she is here; send her a huge hug if she is in heaven.
Awwww.....my mom sounds a lot like your mom except that my dad is still around and nearly 88. My mom also enjoyed great health until 70 when Parkinson's and dementia took her down and took her down fast.
I want to believe that our mom's are keeping a close eye on our families.
05-07-2016 08:34 AM
Unfortunately, not everyone's mom loves their children the way they should. Mine was physically and verbally abusive. Mother's Day is just another day for me.
I have no children and I cannot tell you how many times women have come up to me and most who never met me, asking me if I regret not having children.
When reading your post, I am reminded of my best friend whose mother died in childbirth when she was 5 years old. Her dad remarried in haste and my friend and her younger sister who was 2 at the time of the marriage suffered greatly. She was verbally abusive telling the girls (who to this day are physically beautiful) that they were ugly just like their mother. Her children got everything and my friend was like Cinderella. She came to live with us when she was 17 and she always said, she didn't know how families were supposed to function until she met mine.
Ironically, her dad committed suicide and took his witch of a wife with him. My friend has a successful marriage, three wonderful children and three gorgeous grandchildren.
I am sorry your mom was not good to you. I hope it did not define who you are today.
05-07-2016 08:49 AM
My mom, who passed away several years ago, was fond of one line. It was her cure all, her panacea. She believed in living in the present. She didn't want us to dwell in the past or project what might happen in the future. I remember her telling me to "Be here now".
05-07-2016 09:16 AM - edited 05-07-2016 09:22 AM
My mother was beautiful, ethical, intelligent, and a perfectionist. She was not always easy to live with. She gave everything she had to her loved ones. She was strong and unstintingly generous. She nursed her very difficult mother-in-law in our home for two years, even though they had never gotten along. No one else could deal with my grandmother's demands and anxieties as she struggled with terminal cancer. This even though my parents were divorced and not really in a situation where there was a "truce."
We all miss her every day; yet she is still with us in the core values and integrity she taught us.
05-07-2016 10:41 AM - edited 05-07-2016 10:52 AM
I forgot to add that, as I've often said before, I can still smell the aroma of anise when I think of my mom and me (when I was a young child), baking anise biscotti cookies. In fact, I sometimes take a whiff of anise extract or anise seeds that I always keep in my pantry. Very comforting...........Actually, I used to keep a bowl of star anise (large star-shaped, not seeds) on a bedside table, just for the heavenly aroma. I'll have to buy a new package soon! Thanks for reminding me........
05-07-2016 10:50 AM
My mother passed away a few years ago. She was my best friend. Often when I say things I can hear her talking. She taught me that the BEST REVENGE IS SUCCESS and that I am in charge of my own destiny. Strive to be happy and being called NICE is better than being called BEAUTIFUL.
05-07-2016 11:43 AM
How I wish I had some happy memories to share of my mother. There are none. Being the only daughter of four children, I was the one to do the mother's day gifts, birthday gifts, Christmas gifts and on and on and on. Never an I love you. hug, or a kiss from her. The one good thing that came from my dysfunctional childhood, was I vowed to be the complete opposite. I have been a mother for 48 years (three children) and was the kind of mother I wish I had had growing up. Sad, but true.
05-07-2016 11:54 AM
I have so many wonderful memories of my mum. She was a very innocent English lady with a beautiful singing voice she still had her accent until her passing so it's easy even after 15 years to hear her say Hello Dear ok that did it now I'm tearing up. She sang with the Mormon Tabernacle choir.
She Loved to make our Easter dresses and put Rags in my hair at night so when I got up I had beautiful wavy hair it did something because I have natural curly hair LOL. She wanted a big family and she got one. Seven children and many grands. I miss her so much and couldn't have asked for a better MUM!
OP thanks for starting this thread.
Happy Mothers Day Everyone
05-07-2016 01:31 PM
My mom passed away 4 years ago when she was in her 80s. My favorite memories of her are:
*Singing in the choir and around the house - That is where my love of signing comes from, and I followed in her footsteps. I am singing the "Ave, Maria" at church tomorrow. It is always difficult to sing it without getting choked up because I think of my mom.
*Baking homemade cookies and pies - She gave me her recipes before she passed, and I was able to make some things for her when she was no longer able. I still make her goodies around Christmas time.
*Sewing - My mom made clothes for all of us and herself. She also made hundreds of dolls for the summer picnic to raise money for the church. The dolls, and materials used to make them, were all over the house on every chair and sofa. I have a few on display in my house.
I miss my mom a lot.
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