Community Chat

[lenapecci]

What a beautiful thread. Thank you @SydneyH. 

My mom was the strongest person, in the worst stages of Parkinson's disease my mom would always say there are others who suffer worse than me. I of course

at the time did not think so, her tremors were so bad yet she stayed positive. 

I miss my my mom every day. 

[kivah]

My mother died in 1982 - but I still cry every day. I miss her terribly. My father was emotionally abusive so she didn't have a happy marriage. After they were married for 28 years, my mom and I moved to California (from NY) to start life anew. We were like the other half of each other. We completed each other. Even though she had a difficult childhood and a difficult marriage, she was always smiling and happy. She was smart, well-read, enjoyed doing anything and everything, and she could cook, sew (by hand), knit & crochet. I still have all the beautiful hand-made wool sweaters she made for me. One time, I was expected to go somewhere and I told her that I really didn't want to go -- and her response was "do what makes you happy". I still apply those words today. We didn't have any money but when I was with her, I felt RICH!!!!!

[Shorty2U]

My Mom died young, at the age of 51 in 1979 of heart disease. I still miss her and think of her every day of my life. (Mothers Day has always been a tough day for me, but I keep my spirits up that day, for my childrens sake).

Mom was kind, giving, and very hard working in our family business. She loved History and volunteered for the local Historical Society. She sewed and made beautiful quilts.

She was very intelligent, very down to earth, and fun. Her (and my dad) instilled (in me) many values and the love of family that carry over to my children and grandchildren, even though they never met my mom (They knew my dad who passed away 5 yrs ago).

My Mom would give anyone the clothes off her back. In fact she did without things many times, and so did my dad, so that my brother and I would have everything we needed.

My Mom had so many friends, that in addition to family, the line at the funeral home for her viewing went down an entire city block. She was loved by many and I still have friends who tell me how wonderful she was.

My fondest memories (of many) are baking cookies with her at Christmas and our family shore vacations every year. She (and my dad) were my best friends and the most loving parents anyone could have asked for. I was truly blessed to have had them for parents.

Lastly- My parents had a love for each other like no other. My dad was very heartbroken when mom died. He said he didnt know how he could go on. He did go on, but he never remarried again in all those years. I always had trouble dealing with why she was taken so young. And I wished my mom would have been alive and grown old with my dad, and that she would have seen my children and grandchildren. But it wasnt meant to be.

Well Happy Mothers Day to everyone, and for those of you who lost your moms and are missing them more than ever this weekend, I am sorry for your loss.

[beach-mom]

Such great memories from everyone - thanks for starting this @SydneyH!

Where do I start? My mom died suddenly from septic shock syndrome 20 years ago. DS was one. She was the warmest, most loving, hold-everything-together person I've ever known. She worked, and to me that was normal. She always taught me I could be anything I wanted to be, or do anything I wanted to do. She was an identical twin. My aunt and uncle never had children, so my late brother and I were "theirs" too! 

She and my aunt did not live near each other, but visited each other at least twice a year. I loved to hear their stories about being twins! One of my favorites was when they switched dates one night on a double date, and switched back before the end of the evening. I look more like my aunt than I do my mother - I have a round face like my aunt; my mom's was oval. DD has her face shape.

My mom was a swimmer. She qualified to try out for the Olympic team, but she didn't make the cut. She was a career woman before it was fashionable. She moved to D.C to work and then to Belgium, where she met my dad, who was in the military.  After living in the same apartment building for about three years, they decided to be more than friends!  

She was extremely fashionable and loved makeup. I used to sit and watch her when I was little. I wasn't allowed to wear makeup until my middle teens, but I made up for it then! She had beautiful light hazel eyes (mine are darker hazel), and she had every shade of Estee Lauder shadow they made! Lipstick was either EL or Revlon "Love That Red." She never used any mascara and eye pencil but Maybelline. Her skin was beautiful, and she used Oil of Olay every morning and night. She used Max Factor pancake makeup, and later on Estee Lauder liquid. She always wore clear nail polish. Although I know she wore red when she was younger, I only saw her in clear. 

My only sibling (my brother) died in his 20's. A year after he died, DD was born. She became my mother's reason for living (my dad was gone). I remember when she was a toddler, and she came into my mother's living room with a popsicle. I immediately jumped up and went to scoop her up and carry her out. My mom came in and said she was fine. My brother and I were never allowed to eat in the living room with my mom's oriental rugs and Williamsburg furniture, but DD could! 

Her home was immaculate. Shortly before she died, we were down. DH was sitting in the big easy chair in the corner of the living room reading the paper. There was a small cane chair next to it. He went to use the bathroom, and put the paper on the cane chair. When he came out, my mom had already taken the paper to the recycling pile in the garage!  We all laughed about that!

DH met her before he met me (I didn't know that until later). I loved her so much, and I miss her every day. She's responsible for my happy childhood. I still remember hugging her before she and my dad were going out when I was little and smelling her perfume.  

(Sorry this is long. It felt good typing it and remembering!)

[panda1234]

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@febe1 wrote:

What a lovely thread. I lost I lost my mom in 2003 and have missed her so much. No one is like your mother for friendship, loyal support and love unconditionally.

My mom was all of those things and best friend always. I loved spending time and did so every weekend when possible. I have three brothers and no sisters, and I was always sorry when I couldn't spend time with her. We shopped every weekend, had lunch out and we both just had a good time. There was no one in my life I was ever so happy or comfortable with. 

For those who still have their mothers, please take time to think of everything you want to know about her as a mother, friend. I still have so many questions that I never asked about her, apart from being mother and just her personal self. I wish she were here.

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How lovely. My mom was the great love of my life. I am married with children but my mom's love was different than the love of a husband and children. Just remember, no one will ever love you like your mother. 

[Sunshine]

Unfortunately, not everyone's mom loves their children the way they should. Mine was physically and verbally abusive. Mother's Day is just another day for me.

[febe1]

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@Karnerblue wrote:

My Mom is still alive with health issues but she's tough and strong.  My memories of her were unloving, no affection, cold, verbal and physical abuse.  I learned from her though.  I learned to love my children by supporting them, loving and hugging them daily, keeping them close to my heart and protecting them, and instilling in them to be kind to all and be true to themselves and most important, they have my never-ending love.

I still respect her to this day, mostly out of fear.

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So sorry to hear that, @Karnerblue, but happy you turned it around for your family. 

[febe1]

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@SydneyH wrote:

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@febe1 wrote:

What a lovely thread. I lost I lost my mom in 2003 and have missed her so much. No one is like your mother for friendship, loyal support and love unconditionally.

My mom was all of those things and best friend always. I loved spending time and did so every weekend when possible. I have three brothers and no sisters, and I was always sorry when I couldn't spend time with her. We shopped every weekend, had lunch out and we both just had a good time. There was no one in my life I was ever so happy or comfortable with. 

For those who still have their mothers, please take time to think of everything you want to know about her as a mother, friend. I still have so many questions that I never asked about her, apart from being mother and just her personal self. I wish she were here.

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I hate that I missed soo much time with her when I was being difficult.  Hopefully someone reading this will reevaluate their relationship with their mothers before it's too late.

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I think we all have regrets, @SydneyH. We could have done this or that better. I know I think of things I could have done better. That's a good suggestion for those to "reevaluate." There's so much you don't understand until it's too late. 

[febe1]

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@panda1234 wrote:

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@febe1 wrote:

What a lovely thread. I lost I lost my mom in 2003 and have missed her so much. No one is like your mother for friendship, loyal support and love unconditionally.

My mom was all of those things and best friend always. I loved spending time and did so every weekend when possible. I have three brothers and no sisters, and I was always sorry when I couldn't spend time with her. We shopped every weekend, had lunch out and we both just had a good time. There was no one in my life I was ever so happy or comfortable with. 

For those who still have their mothers, please take time to think of everything you want to know about her as a mother, friend. I still have so many questions that I never asked about her, apart from being mother and just her personal self. I wish she were here.

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How lovely. My mom was the great love of my life. I am married with children but my mom's love was different than the love of a husband and children. Just remember, no one will ever love you like your mother. 

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That's so true, @panda1234. It's good to realize that while you have them. Happy Mother's Day to all. 

[PamfromCT]

My dear Mom went to heaven over six years ago.  I miss her so much.

I could go on and on about her good qualities.  She was a rock.  Loved to bake, and every night there was a wonderful dessert.  Very devoted to her family and her faith.  An immaculate person, a fashionista, loved the color red, and so many seemingly small things come flooding back to me.  When my Dad has a massive heart attack at 60, she quit her job and took such devoted and patient care of him.  Dad died at 64.  She never once complained.

She had perfect health until her late 80s.  But then everything went wrong, very quickly.  Unfortunately due to her declining health and hospitalizations, she had to go to a nursing home.  I had just retired - and would have if I had not.  I saw her very often, and found ways to try to make her happy.  She still loved pretty clothes, and I manicured her nails for her.  So many talks about good times.  My DB and I were her advocates.  But she developed dementia, was good in the morning, but very confused around lunchtime on.  She lasted two and a half years there, but then her doctors told us she was "actively dying."  

She was in Hospice care and passed peacefully.  Inasmuch as this all was a terrible time, it gave me a chance to actively give back to her.  Every holiday we had a special party there, as she was too frail to leave.  She lived to see her first grandchild.  We have a picture of her holding him in her lap, which we entitled "Joy," because of very happy smile.  We arranged a very large birthday party for her when she turned 90, and she was thrilled.  That whole to,e in my life was devoted to her.  My turn to give back just a little.  Oh, she loved her coffee.  

Every morning, when I have my coffee, I say "To you, Mom."  I did miss her more when my DD got married, and when my GD was born.  

But in my heart, I am convinced she is in heaven, watching over us.  I am sorry if this is depressing, but sometimes a lot of good comes from bad times.  Give your Mom a huge hug if she is here; send her a huge hug if she is in heaven.