Community Chat

[Tinkrbl44]

I STILL can't believe it's possible to lose a plane ..... and that things had changed after 9/11.

I assumed that there was some sort of satellite tracking/GPS thing that would make a plane easy to trace. A "ping" that goes dead after only 30 days is really a very short time to be able to track a plane. Yes, if one crashed in the jungle, air searches might be able to track it, but something that goes down in water --- as they have now learned --- could take a VERY long time to find.

My heart goes out to the families.

[Elstongunn]

Of course they are not giving up on finding the plane...yet. It is going into a new phase, however, and private companies/contractors will now be working on the search. It's been reported that it will cost approximately $58 million for this new phase, so they have committed to continue searching, but it won't be done by the number of international countries that have been involved thus far.

This new phase could take quite a while to complete, so it makes no sense to keep families in the Malaysian hotels with their daily lives/jobs on hold waiting for daily updates. Updates will become more sporadic with long stretches between them if nothing of substance is found. Supposedly, there will be centers of information in China where families can gather as well as updates sent to them via electronic media.

It's anyone's guess as to how long this new phase will continue. I believe it's being reported that Maylasia is now planning the initial payouts to the victims' families. These initial payouts will be figured into any additional future compensation, should there be any.

[Rainbows and Roses]

I have not read these posts but I did not realize people were there waiting.........still.........I would have lost hope in finding someone alive after 2 or 3 weeks........I still think one day they will find it but it might be someone that is look for deep sea treasure. Strange they can't find the plane really........the whole story is strange and only the people or pilots know other than our Heavenly and Savior. Sad so very sad and I thought about the people on that plane when I was flying. What they must of felt and the horror they went through. Very very disturbing.

[Rainbows and Roses]

On 5/2/2014 terrier3 said:

Yuban -

You got it right!

Look at Maureen, selling her TSV today. She lost her DH on 9/11, yet she continued living and turned her business into a huge success.

The finest tribute you can pay, IMO, to those who have gone before us, is to remember the good times, honor their memories, and value every precious moment of life.

It's what they would want us to do.

My son does not have cable so I will check out who Maureen is and her TSV special.

[RainCityGirl]

On 5/2/2014 hckynut said:

On 5/1/2014 Lila Belle said:

You giving up on the theory that it might have landed somewhere and we may see a repainted version of it when we least expect it?

I'm not been convinced by anyone or anything that it didn't land somewhere. Look how many years Osama was in Pak. before it was done in. Wouldn't put any thing past this country and seems like they get a coupe bill($$$$)from us every year.

Huh ?

Huh, to your Huh. Here was osama with that certain country not being able to find him and I'll be danged if he wasn't living for years right next door to one of their big military facilities. Sure, they didn't have a clue where he was, and I still believe in the big guy in the sky with the red suit and a big gray beard! Wait, that could be me if I were 100+lbs heavier.

There was ALWAYS speculation that bin Laden was in Pakistan at the courtesy of the Pakistani government. It just took a while to prove it. And what does any of that have to do with a plane that went down in the ocean thousands and thousands of miles in size. Planes crash. Some are found right away; others take time. Some are found accidentally many, many years later. Enough with the conspiracy hallucinations!

[151949]

On 5/2/2014 Evansmom said:

On 5/1/2014 happy housewife said:

Well, there comes a time when people , though they will personally keep hoping the plane did land and they are alive, have to get back to their own lives and start rebuilding without that loved one. A friend of ours was widowed last summer - the day after her DH's funeral she said to me that she finally understands what the saying TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF YOUR LIFE really meant. At some point these families have to start the rest of their lives.And it is past time for that to happen, IMO.

Poor analogy. Your neighbor buried her husband. Without a body or a confirmation of death, I can't blame anyone for having a hard time moving on. Unless you're in there shoes you have no idea how difficult it must be for them.

So what is the alternative - do you honestly think it would be the right thing for these families to spend the next how many weeks, months, or years sitting in a hotel room waiting to hear something? For how long? These people have lives - jobs, families that are still here and need cared for, responsibilities. You don't get to just get off the merry go round when someone in your family dies. The people you owe money to will still expect to be paid each month and your kids still need to go to school and have a home and a stable parent to come home to.

I was widowed suddenly at 30 years old and left to raise 2 kids - believe me , the bank still expects the mortgage paid on the due date and the electric will still be turned off if you don't pay it - they don't care about your grief. Life does not give you very long at all to pick yourself up and get to taking care of things.

[Irshgrl31201]

On 5/2/2014 happy housewife said:

On 5/2/2014 Evansmom said:

On 5/1/2014 happy housewife said:

Well, there comes a time when people , though they will personally keep hoping the plane did land and they are alive, have to get back to their own lives and start rebuilding without that loved one. A friend of ours was widowed last summer - the day after her DH's funeral she said to me that she finally understands what the saying TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF YOUR LIFE really meant. At some point these families have to start the rest of their lives.And it is past time for that to happen, IMO.

Poor analogy. Your neighbor buried her husband. Without a body or a confirmation of death, I can't blame anyone for having a hard time moving on. Unless you're in there shoes you have no idea how difficult it must be for them.

So what is the alternative - do you honestly think it would be the right thing for these families to spend the next how many weeks, months, or years sitting in a hotel room waiting to hear something? For how long? These people have lives - jobs, families that are still here and need cared for, responsibilities. You don't get to just get off the merry go round when someone in your family dies. The people you owe money to will still expect to be paid each month and your kids still need to go to school and have a home and a stable parent to come home to.

I was widowed suddenly at 30 years old and left to raise 2 kids - believe me , the bank still expects the mortgage paid on the due date and the electric will still be turned off if you don't pay it - they don't care about your grief. Life does not give you very long at all to pick yourself up and get to taking care of things.

Oh lord. I don't think that Evansmom was suggesting that at all. I am sure she is quite aware of all the responsibilities that come along with losing someone. I think she knows that you are still expected to pay your obligations. She was simply stating that your analogy was different because your friend at least got some closure since she had a body. No one really knows what happened with these people. Yes, they are most likely dead but they have absolutely no information and with all the theories it must be doubly difficult because they have no body and there is still a very slim possibility they may be alive until they find the wreckage.

[colliegirls]

I didn't realize some families were still in the hotel. However, no matter where these families are, most will not just " get on with their lives" or "move on". From support groups, I am aware that when there is no body, the family always has the hope that they are alive somewhere. Many will spend the rest of their lives looking for answers until the answers come. These disasters are life altering for so many, some worse than others. Some survivors will do better than others, but no one should trivialize the trauma these families are and will be going through. To the outside world, many seem to do well, but no one sees a person's heart or the inner struggle they face to continue to live.

[Yuban3]

On 5/3/2014 colliegirls said:

I didn't realize some families were still in the hotel. However, no matter where these families are, most will not just " get on with their lives" or "move on". From support groups, I am aware that when there is no body, the family always has the hope that they are alive somewhere. Many will spend the rest of their lives looking for answers until the answers come. These disasters are life altering for so many, some worse than others. Some survivors will do better than others, but no one should trivialize the trauma these families are and will be going through. To the outside world, many seem to do well, but no one sees a person's heart or the inner struggle they face to continue to live.

I don't think anyone here is trivializing what the families are going through.

All some of us are saying is that the loved ones left behind do not stop (physically) living.

And as long as you are drawing in oxygen and exhaling carbon dioxide, you learn to take it one minute at a time, then it's one hour at a time, then it's one day at a time and so on.

In other words, you learn to live with a new "normal".

Do they still hurt for their missing loved one?

YES!

No one here is saying that the pain will magically go away.

But life DOES go on.

And you learn how to deal with that life without your loved one in it.

Do you honestly think or believe that those who were left behind are going to stay in the fetal position wailing, day after day, week after week, month after month, and year after year, for the rest of their lives?

Of course they're not.

At some point, they are going to have to return to work, go back and take care of their families.

But by doing that, in NO WAY diminishes the heartache that they feel.

[terrier3]

On 5/2/2014 Rainbows and Roses said:

On 5/2/2014 terrier3 said:

Yuban -

You got it right!

Look at Maureen, selling her TSV today. She lost her DH on 9/11, yet she continued living and turned her business into a huge success.

The finest tribute you can pay, IMO, to those who have gone before us, is to remember the good times, honor their memories, and value every precious moment of life.

It's what they would want us to do.

My son does not have cable so I will check out who Maureen is and her TSV special.

R&R - Maureen is the woman who founded Tarte Cosmetics.

Her husband was an investment banker and died in the Twin Towers.