Community Chat

[Lindsays Grandma]

@Susan in California ...If I remember correctly, years ago here on the boards we were discussing physics which was a popular subject back in the day.  Again, if I remember correctly,  it was you who said you had a friend in Ojai we could contact.  Does that ring a bell?  And thank you for your kind words.

[Desertdi]

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@Lindsays Grandma wrote:

@Desertdi ...Hello Di, I'm so sorry that not one person in your family contacted you when your first cousin died.  To find it out through Facebook had to be a shock and I am sure it was very painful.  One can never understand why people do or don't do what is simply common sense. 

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Dear @Lindsays Grandma      I didn't mean to unload my own situation on you.    But, I thought it might help explain that you are not alone.   I guess some people don't realize that cousins and  friends grieve, also. 

In this "telephone age", I am saddened to see that some people think an impersonal email is sufficient to tell someone their friend has passed on.  di   

[HLP]

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@Lindsays Grandma wrote:

Yesterday I received an e-mail from the daughter of my friend who I communicated with for nine years via e-mail, to let me know her father had passed.  He was her father and my dear friend.  I e-mailed him in March of 2011 to let him know a mutual friend of ours was close to death from breast cancer and from that day forward we became friends.  We never met, he was in Minnesota and I am here in Arizona.  He sent the funniest and most interesting articles to her which she in turn forwarded to me, that's how I knew who he was.  He and I were very close in age, my birthday is in May, his in July, a few months and 5 days apart in age, we had a lot in common, and both divorced for many, many years.

Unfortunately his daughter did not elaborate as to what caused his death.  I hadn't heard from him since the middle of May and started to worry so I e-mailed his daughter to ask if he was okay, she responded with a very short note saying he was in the hospital for 2 weeks and would be going to rehab, period.  I know that he had instructed her to contact me if anything ever happened to him so I felt comfortable in contacting her but she was no nonsense and to the point, thankfully she did let me know he passed.  I will miss the great camaraderie we had, we shared everything and I thank God he was in my life for these last nine years, I always had something to look forward to, now there is only emptiness.  

I am sorry for the length of my thread, please forgive me.  I just have so much bottled up.  There have been too many deaths in my life, a daughter, a son, mother, father, 3 of my dearest and closest women friends and now Jim.  It hurts, a lot.

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I comunicated with ny niece for many years, everyday we would text. She died of cancer last Dec. 19th. I miss this, but life goes on, I do not feel I should mourn my loss, because she would not want me to. I also have lost many  friends and family, but you must except this as life, and try to fill that void with something that makes you happy. I wish you luck.

[Rockycoast]

So sorry for your loss of a good friend. May he rip.

[Mominohio]

@Lindsays Grandma 

I'm so sorry for yet another loss in your life. I understand that even though you never met, having someone that makes you laugh, that shares a lot in common, and that is always just a few key strokes away, can become quite dear to you. 

I'm glad that his daughter let you know, and I know she seemed short and less than connecting with you. I guess it is to be expected that she could really have her hands full right now, and be somewhat overwhelmed with the circumstances. 

I've noticed with my mom who is now 84, one of the down sides of aging is that we seem to loose so many people, the longer we live. Her field of friends is narrowing more and more, and it takes it's toll emotionally. 

I hope you find some joy in the memories of the conversations you shared, and in the funny things he sent over the years. Again, so sorry.

[Susan in California]

@Lindsays Grandma 

Hello, I'm sorry that wasn't me.

[Athome2]

@Lindsays Grandma When my son died you were one of the people that I was so shocked to hear had lost so many because of your cheerful, sweet attitude and now you’ve had another loss. Please accept my sympathy and prayers. I’m so sorry to hear this.

[Drythe]

@Lindsays Grandma 

Please accept my best wishes and understanding of your sadness.  

Sometimes people do downplay relationships that are on line, they think they are not really meaningful, but they can be, as you know.  There are some very special people here such as yourself, please do stay close.

You are always so kind kind and thoughtful, I am sending you a virtual hug,  which I hope you will accept as a sincere expression of sadness for your loss, and hope for your eventual peaceful acceptance.  I always tell myself that surely, with time, and enough practice losing loved ones gets easier to bear, but it really does not.

Please continue in good Hope and Light.

[Lindsays Grandma]

@Sandy Sparkles

@Desertdi 

@Jordan2 

I said I would get back to you and here I am.  When I called Jim's daughter, and it was not the first or only time I had spoken to her, her response was unbelievable.  This is what she wrote back:  "You are rude and nosey.  My father's well being is of no concern of you, only his family."

I had no choice but to respond in kind:  "Yes, it is my business because your father made it my business for nine years."  "And I don't understand how asking about someone's well being makes them rude and nosey."  Of course I don't expect, nor do I want, a response from her.

I pulled up a few of Jim's funniest correspondences which did make me laugh but then the tears came too.  Of course that is to be expceted.  Thanks to all of you for being there for me, there is no one left in my life I can turn to and my daughter, well, it's hard to get comfort from someone who is all about themself.  Thanks for listening.  

[SouthernBee]

@Lindsays Grandma : 🤗❤️❤️🙏🙏Southern Bee