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Honored Contributor
Posts: 38,231
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Your last name stays put.               

The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.                 

You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.         

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. 
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress-$5000. Tux rental-$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.           

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.  
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 20 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

When it comes to NICKNAMES · If Sheila, Candy and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Sheila, Candy and Sarah.


If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman .

EATING OUT · When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50.None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.


When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY · A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
· A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's On Sale.

BATHROOMS · A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.


The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS · A woman has the last word in any argument.
· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE · A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

· A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

MARRIAGE · A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
· A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP · A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.


 A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL · Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING · Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.· A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.


THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
  

 
 
Honored Contributor
Posts: 26,549
Registered: ‎12-17-2012

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

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Fate whispers to her, "You cannot withstand the storm." She whispers back, "I am the storm."

Honored Contributor
Posts: 33,205
Registered: ‎05-17-2010

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

@mousiegirl. I just don't know where to start. I am so opposed to this way of thinking and find it demeaning to women. 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎11-25-2011

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,702
Registered: ‎08-22-2013

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

I don't know if they are happier, but they seem not to worry about the small stuff or at least what they think the small stuff is.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 31,023
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

Have you always hate men or did it just start...lol    A lot of hate and anger comes out that thing.  I'm sorry about whatever caused those feelings.  Can you imagine the uproar if a man posted something like that about women...lol

Honored Contributor
Posts: 38,231
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

[ Edited ]

@Shanus  I found this to be very true, and funny, not demeaning at all, unless facts are demeaning.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,247
Registered: ‎10-04-2010

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

[ Edited ]

He can wear comfortable pants and not ask if they make his butt look too big

 

He doesn't have to ask directions

 

You left out "dude" that they can call each other. 

 

He may try something "fun" even if he hurts something, breaks something (on his body), or makes a complete fool of himself, and his friends will laugh, ask if he's ok, and keep right on filming him. 

 

(I'd rather be a woman).  I go into this as just having fun. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,200
Registered: ‎11-15-2011

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE


@Shanus wrote:

@mousiegirl. I just don't know where to start. I am so opposed to this way of thinking and find it demeaning to women. 

 


I agree, but I also find it to be SO TRUE!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 38,231
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE


@qualitygal wrote:

He can wear comfortable pants and not ask if they make his butt look too big

 

He doesn't have to ask directions

 

You left out "dude" that they can call each other. 

 

He may try something "fun" even if he hurts something, breaks something (on his body), or makes a complete fool of himself, and his friends will laugh, ask if he's ok, and keep right on filming him. 

 

(I'd rather be a woman).  I go into this as just having fun. 


@qualitygal  He does have to ask for directions, but never does. always getting lost while I say stop and ask for directions, lol.