Looking for your thoughts... - Page 3

NoelSeven · ‎03-09-2010

I would think it depends on your dad's health and whether he and your mom will need your help. Something like prostate cancer can be slow and treatable.

If that's not the case, and if your dad will need surgery or chemo, your parents may need your help. Only you know that, and it may also depend on their age and your mom's health.

IMO ultimately, your parents come first, and if they need help and you stay to give it to them, it will be an invaluable lesson for your children. A lesson in love, family, and being there for each other.

A Thrill Of Hope The Weary World Rejoices

KathyPet · ‎03-09-2010

obviously you are uncomfortable with the idea of going without your parents and I do not blame you. You are very fortunate to have been able to take this trip on a yearly basis without interruption and your children will hardly be scarred for life if you miss a year. family is much more important then a trip to DW and the time spent with your father can never be replaced and it will be a lesson well learned for your children. if your sister wants to go then let her make her own decision but you should do what you feel,is the right decision for you. PS I could not even conceive of spending every vacation for 20 years with the mouse. hasn't anyone ever wanted to,try something different?

pistolino · ‎07-04-2011

Disney's not going anywhere and even if you all went I can pretty much guarantee you'll be thinking about your father not being there most of the time.

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

Yes, kindly forget what your sister does or doesn't do. You and your family spend the time comforting your dear Dad and dear Mom. Their grandchildren being there with them will bring them much comfort. Your children will benefit from this lesson in life. Things happen and we sometimes have to temporarily change our path. There's always tomorrow. Later in their lives, they will one day remember how kind and helpful they were to their dear grandparents.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

Lila Belle · ‎01-24-2013

If it were me I'd have my vacation spent near my parents.

I'm sorry you're all going through this.

VanSleepy · ‎10-05-2010

I don't have enough information, but it looks like I'm the only one who agrees with your sister. The trip is 7 days? 10 days? Would you normally be spending every day with your parents? Is your mother capable of taking care of his needs? You sound like you don't really want to go, so you should follow your instincts, but I don't see anything wrong with your sister wanting to go ahead with the trip.

sidsmom · ‎11-25-2011

So sorry about your father.

Unfortunately, I grew up with parents that would've wanted us to go...to continue on with the tradition for the grandkids. My parents are/were unselfish like that. I have to side with the sister...to continue on for the kids. Of course, the conditions change with the severity of the cancer, but if nothing's changing between now & summertime, don't upset the kids routine (have your wife take them, but you could stay home).

occasionalrain · ‎03-10-2010

On 5/6/2014 ROMARY said:
Our kids have to learn that everything isn't possible all of the time. I would tell my children that Disneyland will be there next year and that Grandpa and Grandma are our top priority right now. That we are going to spend time with them, trying to be helpful and cheerful. This will teach them lifelong lessons: Be patient. Be helpful.

I agree too.

How could you, your sister, or the children enjoy a Disney trip under the circumstances?

Mominohio · ‎08-08-2010

On 5/6/2014 focksie said:
On 5/6/2014 Michael Knight said: The cancer diagnoses really hit my family hard. My sister and I are trying to justify the trip because of the kids. Obviously my dad is more important to me than any vacation and I was leaning towards not going at all. My sister however thinks going shouldn't be a problem because we have children of our own now. I will definitely talk it over with mom and dad, I was just trying to get some unbiased opinions.

Not sure I understand the bolded sentence. Do you mean your sister thinks her children should take priority and their needs are more important than your parents' needs or wishes?

I would disagree. Your parents are going through a tough battle and need all the support they can get. It's important for children to learn how to handle disappointment and as another poster said to learn to adapt to a changing situation. Your sister can make it up to them in another way if she wants to.

The sister in this situation reminds me of my brother. No matter how bad a situation my mom is in, my brother is always wanting to "run" and uses his kids and their "needs" as excuses. At any age, the grandkids would benefit from interacting with their grandparents at this time so much more than yet another trip to Disney. I think your sister is not wanting to deal with this, and she needs to. You can't make her deal with it, but I'd confront her with it.