Just a little vent on someone NOT saying thanks - Page 12

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@qbetzforreal wrote:
There are a lot of adults, grown folks who do not say thank you.

Absolutely. It's not a "younger generation" or "kids today" issue. Older people can be rude too, and certainly a lot of younger people have good manners

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@Maudlynn wrote:
My sister in law never says thank you and she's a grown woman. It's not that she's not grateful, I just don't think it was something said or emphasized during her upbringing. With that said, my sister in law would give you the shirt off her back, is always the first one to volunteer to help and takes it upon herself to make sure my mother has everything she needs. There has never been a time that my SIL didn't help set-up or clean up during holidays or summer cook outs. She's quirky, but she's the bomb. I can forgive the thank you thing- my brother has taught their kids to say it.
Sometimes, it's more important to look at the bigger picture.

I so agree!

I was raised to say please and thank you, excuse me, the whole bit, and I raised my children the same. However, my DIL was apparently raised differently. She's a lovely girl, could not be sweeter, and she's always very kind to me and everyone else. She rarely says thank you, though. I find it odd, but I've let it go because she is really wonderful in so many ways and she makes my son happy. I know her parents well, and they're very generous and loving, and we're all friends now. It makes no sense to me how such fine people raised their kids and left out the whole "thank you" thing!

I did mention it to my son early on, but I've let it go because - as you said - sometimes it's best to look at the bigger picture.

PodyPo · ‎01-31-2011

@qualitygal You are so right! I recall being about 4 or 5 and coming home from a birthday party. My mother asked me if I had thanked the girl’s mother, who was not visible when I left. I said “no” and my mom put me in the car, drove me over to the party girl’s home, and required me to ring the bell and thank the mother. I always remembered that.

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:
@Sadiesadie wrote:
@CelticCrafter wrote:
The one thing that really irks me about someone not saying thank you is when I hold a door for them.
I have been known to tell them I'm not your doorman.
Our little convenience store has a double door and I will say thank you both times even though it's the same person holding it for me.
@CelticCrafter: When someone doesn't acknowledge with a thank when I hold a door I'll say loud enough in a sing song tone to make sure they hear me say "You're Welcome".
It really doesn't happen frequently but I'll do that each time.
i just keep walking so no idea if they heard me but makes me feel better. I don't want to be or sound angry because then it would be about my ego which is just negative for me.

That's rude the sing-song thing.

So you only hold doors just for a "thank-you"?

How about holding doors because it's the nice thing to do and not caring if they say "thank-you" or not?

It makes your life so much better when you do that.

I agree. When I hold a door open, I do it to be helpful and kind. Most of the time people thank me, but sometimes they don't. It's nice when they do, but either way they get thru the door, which was my intent.

There are rude people in this world, and there are courteous ones, and it's pretty much a given that we'll encounter both. I just can't become emotionally invested in how a stranger responds when I open a door. I'm responsible for what I do, and whatever they do is on them. Either way, I go about my day, and never give it another thought.

(Also - I say thank you when someone holds a door for me. I'm very big on thanking everybody for everything, and I say thank you all day long for various reasons. However, I'm certain there have been times when I've been in a rush, or distracted, or perhaps said thank you too softly to be heard when someone has held a door open for me. Even people with excellent manners are not perfect all the time, so in this situation, I can easily let it go.)