Community Chat

[Slate]

On 3/12/2015 Joey Heatherton said: It's sad and disheartening to me that the pseudonymous Leroy continues to be referred to as a "perv" and some kind of "dirty old man"...........he is a patient/client living at home but still in need of a professional healthcare aide..........JustJules was not from MerryMaids......unfortunately Leroy was paired with an aide who was either not-trained or emotionally unprepared to deal with an unsettling event.............there is no comparison between an inappropriate, housebound and dependent patient......and sexual harassment/assault by an employer or supervisor or coworker or the traveling IT pro who arrives to scrub our computers of malware.......also, I did not comment in my earlier posts about JustJules' ultimate handling of the situation but now I will........screaming at a patient is never acceptable.........And then walking out on a patient when you've been assigned the duty is dereliction.........that we continue to high-five and pronounce "you go girl/you did everything right," is outrageous to me......reputable agencies have 24/7 emergency contact numbers for their aides or for concerned families to reach out when regular business hrs are ended...........if an aide has ANY kind of situation where she cannot complete her assignment then it is mandatory that she arrange to be relieved of duty by another aide or supervisor BEFORE she walks out on a patient............would anyone leave a small child alone because the little one wouldn't stop crying or was somehow difficult?.........JustJules, if you read this I am not trying to pile on...........there are over 200 replies here now, most well meaning and helpful...........first step is to PLS get your own cell.......

Your post is spot on! The OP acted in a very unprofessional way beginning with taking the dog to work with her to leaving this poor, old gentleman unattended.

[raven-blackbird]

On 3/12/2015 puglet1 said:

It was also incredibly sad to me to hear so many posters refer to the patient as a "perv", "dirty old man" or "lech." Inappropriate and aggressive sexual behavior can be a symptom of dementia as I know all too well. It is absolutely heartbreaking to watch a loved one exhibit such foreign, unexplainable, and unsettling behavior. It should not have been assumed here that the patient was in control of his behavior.

EXACTLY...........he's old..........in ill health........probably on a lot of medication......one of those things let alone a combination can affect how one responds to situations..............BUT............because he's male, it's automatically dismissed and he's labeled a perv...........and by some people who throw a fit when they say they see discrimination??????????...........where was that firm stand when this poor old guy was placed on the stake.............................raven

[bikerbabe]

On 3/12/2015 Joey Heatherton said: It's sad and disheartening to me that the pseudonymous Leroy continues to be referred to as a "perv" and some kind of "dirty old man"...........he is a patient/client living at home but still in need of a professional healthcare aide..........JustJules was not from MerryMaids......unfortunately Leroy was paired with an aide who was either not-trained or emotionally unprepared to deal with an unsettling event.............there is no comparison between an inappropriate, housebound and dependent patient......and sexual harassment/assault by an employer or supervisor or coworker or the traveling IT pro who arrives to scrub our computers of malware.......also, I did not comment in my earlier posts about JustJules' ultimate handling of the situation but now I will........screaming at a patient is never acceptable.........And then walking out on a patient when you've been assigned the duty is dereliction.........that we continue to high-five and pronounce "you go girl/you did everything right," is outrageous to me......reputable agencies have 24/7 emergency contact numbers for their aides or for concerned families to reach out when regular business hrs are ended...........if an aide has ANY kind of situation where she cannot complete her assignment then it is mandatory that she arrange to be relieved of duty by another aide or supervisor BEFORE she walks out on a patient............would anyone leave a small child alone because the little one wouldn't stop crying or was somehow difficult?.........JustJules, if you read this I am not trying to pile on...........there are over 200 replies here now, most well meaning and helpful...........first step is to PLS get your own cell.......

This.

[Surfnturf]

I totally agree, Joey, and thank you for articulating your post in a respectful way.

[Toppers]

On 3/12/2015 Joey Heatherton said: It's sad and disheartening to me that the pseudonymous Leroy continues to be referred to as a "perv" and some kind of "dirty old man"...........he is a patient/client living at home but still in need of a professional healthcare aide..........JustJules was not from MerryMaids......unfortunately Leroy was paired with an aide who was either not-trained or emotionally unprepared to deal with an unsettling event.............there is no comparison between an inappropriate, housebound and dependent patient......and sexual harassment/assault by an employer or supervisor or coworker or the traveling IT pro who arrives to scrub our computers of malware.......also, I did not comment in my earlier posts about JustJules' ultimate handling of the situation but now I will........screaming at a patient is never acceptable.........And then walking out on a patient when you've been assigned the duty is dereliction.........that we continue to high-five and pronounce "you go girl/you did everything right," is outrageous to me......reputable agencies have 24/7 emergency contact numbers for their aides or for concerned families to reach out when regular business hrs are ended...........if an aide has ANY kind of situation where she cannot complete her assignment then it is mandatory that she arrange to be relieved of duty by another aide or supervisor BEFORE she walks out on a patient............would anyone leave a small child alone because the little one wouldn't stop crying or was somehow difficult?.........JustJules, if you read this I am not trying to pile on...........there are over 200 replies here now, most well meaning and helpful...........first step is to PLS get your own cell.......

It's not necessary for you to insult those of us who actually agreed with her.

In my opinion, she felt threatened by him, and she acted in a way that she felt was best for her.

Where I place the blame, is on the agency actually, for not training her in how to handle this situation were it to come up at some point in time, and for not telling her about this client, if they knew about any of his particular behaviors, and didn't warn her about them ahead of time, before she went to work with him.

If anything, they should have male aides working with him, as others have already mentioned.

If there was a 24/7 contact number for her to call at her agency, I am sure that she would have known about it when she signed on with them.

If I was in her particular situation and it was late at night, and there was no one else on-call for me to contact at the agency, then I probably would have left, as well.

Sometimes you do the best that you can do, given what you have to work with, and then you learn what to do next time, when you get some direction.

I have been in situations myself, where I have been verbally "hit on" by clients, too, in the past. Believe me, it is no fun. I did nothing to even "encourage" them, at all. Some of them are so lonely, that they are just encouraged by someone being naturally kind to them in a professional role.

I don't even know what a crying child comparison has to even do with this thread, anyway.

[kalikokty]

On 3/12/2015 lulu2 said:

On 3/12/2015 Joey Heatherton said: It's sad and disheartening to me that the pseudonymous Leroy continues to be referred to as a "perv" and some kind of "dirty old man"...........he is a patient/client living at home but still in need of a professional healthcare aide..........JustJules was not from MerryMaids......unfortunately Leroy was paired with an aide who was either not-trained or emotionally unprepared to deal with an unsettling event.............there is no comparison between an inappropriate, housebound and dependent patient......and sexual harassment/assault by an employer or supervisor or coworker or the traveling IT pro who arrives to scrub our computers of malware.......also, I did not comment in my earlier posts about JustJules' ultimate handling of the situation but now I will........screaming at a patient is never acceptable.........And then walking out on a patient when you've been assigned the duty is dereliction.........that we continue to high-five and pronounce "you go girl/you did everything right," is outrageous to me......reputable agencies have 24/7 emergency contact numbers for their aides or for concerned families to reach out when regular business hrs are ended...........if an aide has ANY kind of situation where she cannot complete her assignment then it is mandatory that she arrange to be relieved of duty by another aide or supervisor BEFORE she walks out on a patient............would anyone leave a small child alone because the little one wouldn't stop crying or was somehow difficult?.........JustJules, if you read this I am not trying to pile on...........there are over 200 replies here now, most well meaning and helpful...........first step is to PLS get your own cell.......

This is one of the best posts on this thread.

I cannot believe some think the OP handled the situation properly and professionally.

She didn't. Very UNPROFESSIONAL.

[PIT-HAG Melissa]

Northern nights - WHERE DID SHE INSULT OTHER POSTERS IN THAT RESPONSE?

[maryebrown_1]

On 3/12/2015 croemer said:

On 3/12/2015 puglet1 said:

It was also incredibly sad to me to hear so many posters refer to the patient as a "perv", "dirty old man" or "lech." Inappropriate and aggressive sexual behavior can be a symptom of dementia as I know all too well. It is absolutely heartbreaking to watch a loved one exhibit such foreign, unexplainable, and unsettling behavior. It should not have been assumed here that the patient was in control of his behavior.

I agree puglet...thanks for saying this.

That is very true ! I have witnessed (at my former ALF job) Residents who were very pleasant and cooperative during my Day Shift (6 a.m. to 2 p.m.) but would turn into a completely "different" person, when I had to cover on the 2 p.m. to 10 p.m. shift...it started after Dinner, AND most of these Residents enjoyed several Spirits (be it Beer, Wine, or Liquor) with their Dinners !The Frisky male Residents (on Day Shift) became much more Frisky & Aggressive/Suggestive by 6 p.m...Jekyll & Hyde's, they were.

THEY may have enjoyed it, but us RA's did not - the confusion, combativeness, and restlessness within the Facility was widespread, like an epidemic - AND the Residents with progressing Alzheimers became unruly and more unpredictable. Their "Sundowning" syndrome kept everyone busy, trying to keep tabs on them, and many were up and about the facility, for most of the night ! I knew Who they were after working the Evening shift, because They were the ones who never went to Breakfast (since they were catching up on their sleep), and Lunch was 'breakfast' to them + Dinner was their *Big Time Meal-of-The-Day", that would keep them 'partying' all night long...

[Slate]

On 3/12/2015 Alley Catvocate said: Northern nights - WHERE DID SHE INSULT OTHER POSTERS IN THAT RESPONSE?

SHE DIDN""T.

[Surfnturf]

This thread just proves what I already knew. No matter what your opinion is about anything here, there will be some who take issue with what you post, no matter what. That's why I would NEVER share ANYTHING here about my personal life..