Community Chat

[monicakm]

@juanitalinda 

I am sure you have other talents

[monicakm]

@spiderw 

When my grandson would complain about house chores his mom would make him do, I would tell him how grateful his future wife will be that he knows how to do those things.

[monicakm]

@SandySparkles 

My family jokes about being able to eat off my floors without worry!

My family used to make those kinds of comments too.  Two knee surgeries and a heart surgery later, I am not that clean freak anymore.  I hope to be again someday but with my husband home now, he is helping more with those chores.

[SandySparkles]

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@monicakm wrote:

@SandySparkles 

My family jokes about being able to eat off my floors without worry!

My family used to make those kinds of comments too.  Two knee surgeries and a heart surgery later, I am not that clean freak anymore.  I hope to be again someday but with my husband home now, he is helping more with those chores.

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@monicakm Welcome!🥰 You are quite fortunate to have a husband who is that thoughtful! Some men just do not favor chores and will GLADLY pay for housekeepers!😂

I am truly sorry that multiple surgeries have curtailed your ability to clean as you would like to!❤️ I had my right knee replaced several years past from a serious, PAINFUL injury that did not heal properly, so I empathize with you and am happy that you are healed and able to join in chat with us when you like!😊

THANK you SO much for caring to share!🤗

 ~~~All we need is LOVE💖

[JoyFilled Warrior]

Hi @Cakers3 

I dont know about that either.

Except, at the beginning, she left the house, & took the kids with her, (according to him).  Was there some "abandonment" legal thing about her leaving?? And with the kids?   I dont know.

Also, the divorced Dad kept saying she had a steady stream of men she was bopping, even many visiting her/their home.  And their kids were home schooled, all the time these "men" were supposedly coming & going there meeting the Mom. Really??????

Last few years or two, their now divorced Dad kept pummeling the kids (& me) with his (ex) wife bopping, at first, 10 men, then became 20 men, then 50 men, and eventually his "telling the same tale" short time, but escalated up to 200 men! 

   And he'd get exasperated with me, as a neighbor, as to why I didnt see all these men coming and going from my neighboring home?  (ALL this,  while the kids were being home-schooled)   HUH???   He had all 5 of them, incl self, in therapy,  his choice of therapists, and as such, the therapists supposed declared him the "safe parent," HE SAYS.

  *shrugs* I DID NOT see all these >200 men, (altho Im kind of a person who "doesnt pay much snoopy attention to neighbors").  Seems I wouldnt miss 200 men coming, or even 10 men, going to her home there! 

     He said he had some device, on her car, or phone, & proof he had evidence she was caught going to GYNs for abortion (altho he said his device was always 10 minutes delay).  How would he know why the reason for her visit??? 

    ONLY a couple of times when they were still together, she'd have me there, looking after the kids, for her very short, GYN appt, she said, and she was very briefly away. I DID NOT TELL HIM ABOUT ANY OF THIS!

This divorced Husb/Wife kept going to Court for YEARS with supposedly, no resolution betw the two with legal custody, except, the kids happened to be living with him at the time, but the Judge supposedly would NOT give either the father/mother sole legal custody of the kids, supposedly.

All this is coming from his one-sided self, mind you!! Which I've since learned NOT to trust.  Imagine me "forced" to move there??? And it's even worse, but I'll spare you.

Seems like a royal mess to me.  Poor kids.  He was said he was allowed to physically keep the kids, 'cause he says their therapists say "he was the safe parent," vs their own Mom/ex wife.

If they "acted out" at my particular home, *POOF*  no more visits

  on & on  .. story/drama continues....

.. gets even more interesting & sad, IMHO ...   

[CoffeeNut]

             TMI

[JoyFilled Warrior]

Hi  @CoffeeNut 

BTW, in case you werent aware, on a Laptop, you can *Press the Space Bar* and it scrolls down, *One Page at a Time.*  That might help you with your issue.

[Lucky Charm]

@JoyFilled Warrior  This neighbor of yours wanted you to move in with him?  Was he a friend, or interested in romance or looked at you like Hazel?

I can't imagine seeing children living in deplorable conditions that shovels and rakes were used inside the home. 

Did it ever occur to you to call the authorities?

Children brought up in these conditions can't expect to be able to all at once *get it* and start with a clean slate. 

They probably need(ed) counciling to help them overcome what they've always known and how to go about changing their habits.

But within a one parent home where the adult is totally irresponsible for the health and wellness of their child(ren), I'm betting CPS would remove them.

I don't know if I'd be able to sleep knowing how bad their home life is.

Are you still in contact with them?

[JoyFilled Warrior]

Hi @Lucky Charm 

I think, pretty sure, he was looking for a "Hazel." 

Not romantic at all.  I kept remembering he'd say, his gal friend was OCD and he loved visiting her clean, tidy house.  He'd hope she would be his g/f.  But they were similar age.  Not like me/him

His kids would run out of TP.  I put their home on AutoDel at Amz for their TP.  First time, he smiled, as if it'd be some super great gift.  But frowned when it turned out TP.

His 2nd & 6th grade girls were still wetting/saturating the bed at night, so when I went out shopping, I picked them up pads for their wetting the bed in their sizes. IMHO, they were too old to keep wetting the bed. But, HE'd say they're wetting their bed still because of bad memories of their loose Mom, and he was the "safe parent,"  Nurturing them.

My guess is, he liked *ME* supplying TP & pads for them also, as if Hazel.  But I couldnt stand they were going without, in fact, the entire house w/o TP!  Incl the boys!

    I went over one time, and there was a half empty pizza box on the floor, right beside their trash bin. ALL of them just stepped over that box with food in it still.  I just picked it up and put it in the rubbish!  I later figured out, this probably cont'd to feed his "Hazel" idea.

So, perhaps the more I couldnt stand & pick up, he thought, "wow, this is like my OCD gal friend, when he'd show up to her clean, tidy "hotel house" for him. "Wouldnt it be nice to have me Full Time "Hazel," is my guess."

Pushing me to move in with him, even engineering behind my back, i nearly spit out my drink when he said, we could talk about my rent fee after I moved in.  Guess that was his idea of a job, recieving money from a "desperate, elderly, OCD cleaning former neighbor who kept trying to save his escaped animals, and loved his kids."  ALL this was revealed ONLY in time, as pieces were being put together about this.

His ex-wife, AND both her parents kept calling various Depts in City, including Child Protection, but none of them would be able to catch him."  I had no idea why not!  His former FIL was an MD!!  But this guy was soo cagey,, even with me!

NO!  Im not in touch with them. 

He & I had a BIG, BIG BLOWUP!  When I discovered, behind my back he'd been engineering this for months abt my "usefulness" to him/his kids.   I dumped him/them like a hot potato when moved here.   Thank goodness.  But I felt in danger with him, myself, even still!!  The Therapist for ALL 5 of them is only 2 blocks from here!  5 various visits a week!

I considered showing up at their ExWife-Mom/ ex-Husb/Father  Court Dates, (seemed to be every 3-4 months).  But he's very very very vengeful!  more than I even expected.

When I felt safe to do so, I let it rip, & we had a big blow up, - I texted the kids goodbye & caring,  & I stopped contact with all, esp him.  I felt in danger.

[monicakm]

@SandySparkles 

You're too sweet   Thank you.