ITALIAN CRUISE

Lindsays Grandma · ‎03-10-2010

A young New York woman was so depressed she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. Just before she could throw herself from the the docks, a handsome young man stopped her. "You have so much to live for," he said. "I'm a sailor and we are off to Italy tomorrow. I can stow you away on my ship. "I'll take care of you, bring you food every day, and keep you happy. When we get to Italy, you will be SO GLAD you're alive." With nothing to lose and always wanting to see Italy, she accepted.

That night the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a small but comfortable compartment in the ship's hold. From then on, every night he would bring her sandwiches, a bottle of red wine, and make love to her until dawn.

Two weeks later she was discovered by the captain during a routine inspection. "What are you doing here?" asked the captain. "I have an arrangement with a sailor," she replied. "He brings me food and I get a free trip to Italy." "I see," the captain said. Then her conscience got the best of her, "Plus, he's screwing me."

"He certainly is, replied the captain, "This is the Staten Island Ferry."

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam

Love my grandkids · ‎11-24-2013

@Lindsays Grandma HA HA HA!! Good one!

SandySparkles · ‎06-13-2010

I was really into this until the punchline.😂😂😂.

~~~All we need is LOVE💖

Mz iMac · ‎07-26-2014

"Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference."

NicksmomESQ · ‎08-19-2014

@Lindsays Grandma Thanks for the laugh 😂 😂 .I needed it!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

gizmogal · ‎05-09-2014

Particularly funny for those of us who have actually ridden the (very unromantic) Staten Island ferry!! Good laugh. Thanks!

faeriemoon · ‎03-14-2010

Good one!!

~Whenever a king sees that his people are about to revolt, he starts a war...~ Napoleon

Bridgegal · ‎03-09-2010

Thanks for the morning chuckle. Good one.

twinsister · ‎03-12-2010

@Lindsays Grandma - thanks for the laugh! Especially since I live in NYC and have taken the Staten Island Ferry!

this is my nic · ‎03-30-2010

LOL!

I was wondering what century this two week cruise to Italy was taken! A two week cruise on the Staten Island ferry is too funny! Smooth talking sailor!