I think my hubby needs hospice, please help - Page 4

conlt · ‎03-16-2010

I am not sure where you live, but there may be a visiting physician group in your area. He is probably a candidate for hospice, but as a nurse I like "palliative care" much better for our patients. Palliative care is comfort care for the very sick and dying. The goal is to make the best most comfortable life possible for the patient. Unlike hospice, with palliative care the patient can still seek treatment if they want. There are palliative care physicians around. Call the local hospital or research. You can get hospice or palliative care at home. The urgent care people are not going to do anything to help you most likely. You can call the home care people either hospice or palliative today and they can probably arrange to come out this weekend. You might have to call the doctor who diagnosed him and have him or her call the hospice or palliative care with an order. Hugs, I am so sorry you and your husband are going through this.

ILTH · ‎05-18-2015

@Ditzydori

Please call CALVARY HOSPICE immediately. They're wonderful.

http://www.calvaryhospital.org/site/pp.asp?c=ktJUJ9MPIsE&b=3226197

You have to wait for a room to open up, but, you should start getting the information, now.

Contact their hospital, too. (I won't get into my feelings about S-K)

Bri36 · ‎02-20-2017

Get him to the nearest hospital today!

Stray · ‎04-20-2013

I agree with @conlt- I am a nurse as well. Also, if the doctor is in Australia, there will be a covering doctor to help you. I am located in the NYC area as well and have referred many to Calvary Hospice which is wonderful. They are in the Bronx but serve many surrounding communities and I don't know where you are located but they will also refer you to something near you. Also, if you are in a Town, you can call your health department, not today but Monday. The nurse may have a list of doctors who make house calls. Your local visiting nurse association can direct you as well. My sister just passed away from cancer this week, I would suggest not getting involved with an acute care hospital if you can avoid it and are seeking palliative care. However, you want your husband to be comfortable and may not have a choice.

LTT1 · ‎03-09-2010

@Ditzydori

You need an ambulance... they drive all over the place. Get him in one and on the way right away.

~Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit~

debic · ‎09-02-2010

I've had 2 experiences with Hospice. Both were facilitated by the patient's doctor. Both had the Hospice people come and interview us to make sure we were eligible. It was a simple process. Different states have different rules. Mine was in Utah and Oregon. Both were invaluable to my family.

I'm sorry for your issues, something I wouldn't wish on anyone.

~~
*Off The Deep End~A very short trip for some!*

geezerette · ‎03-16-2010

@Ditzydori

First let me say how sorry I am that you and your family are suffering through this ordeal. Just reading this thread brings tears to my eyes and a lump to my throat remembering my own situation with my father many years ago. It's awful.

Second, I'm not going to offer any medical suggestions as you have already gotten some wonderful advice from many, especially the nurses that have responded that live on your area.

But what I am going to say is this: I think you, your husband (you say he is still lucid at this point) and your children need to discuss what YOU want. Do you want to continue treatments? The hospital/doctor route would be your best bet. Do you want to just allieviate pain and let nature take its course at this point? Then hospice would probably work for you. Or do you want something in between, like the suggested palliative care?

I know this is not what you want to even think about, let alone pursue, but it is the point you are at now. Let your children help you with the details of calling various places, it will help relieve some of your stress. Depending on the option you choose, some of these organizations not only help the patient, but also the loved ones. It sounds like your husband now needs more help than you can give him alone and you are at your breaking point.

Again, I am so very sorry.

Cindipup · ‎12-22-2010

Praying for you and your Husband.

Evie2004 · ‎09-09-2010

Dori, since you are with your family now, please ask their help in finding a hospice, preferably a not-for-profit one, to come & evaluate your husband THIS weekend..this should be done by an RN or LSW..hospices respond 24-7.

You do not HAVE to have a Dr for the referral..if the nurse or social worker feels he qualifies for hospice care, there will be a hospice medical director (Dr) who will admit him to the program, order meds & any equipment he may need for home hospice care.Please don't wait much longer for this evaluation visit. As soon as his needs are managed, you will be able to recouperate & be able to help care for him. I am sorry you are having to go through this, but it does sound like hospice care will be the answer to your prayers..take care.

Quse · ‎09-05-2014

@Ditzydori I'm sorry. I've been through this several times and it's never easier.

The first thing would be to decide whether your husband is "done" or not. Only he can decide that. When people get to the point that the struggle is just too hard, hospice is where to go.

Also, there may be houses that religious organizations have, similar to hospice, with a faith based palliative center. They will take anyone if they have the space, but give preference to those of a certain faith (whatever the religion that manages it is). Here, there is a house started by Franciscan nuns that both my mother and brother went to. I can't say enuf about the place, the people were so caring and so helpful.

Also, with my brother, he was allowed to stay at home and hospice came to the house. They gave pain meds as needed. It worked for a while, but the stress on my parents became too much and they (and he) decided to go into the Franciscan hospice.

If hospice is the decision, you should sit down as a family and discuss what's happening. Any end of life place will need a doctors order, and will also send out a social worker to assess. Once he goes into hospice, they will remove him from any medication that he is on and give him pain meds as needed.

I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this. I pray for you and your family, and whatever you decide, to keep fighting or not, I pray for peace for you all.