starpolisher..... it sounds like you are in mourning..... you are grieving the loss of what you thought life would be like....
Think about where we get the ideas of what life will be like.... where you got the images in your head.... we all have this going on.... when the real things happen we have to decide what to do with reality....
If we have a major loss we have to put walls up around us.... this is a merciful kind of protection which keeps us insulated.... we have to sort out our life.... usually we think we cant open up about our grief, our fears, our reality.... because we think we wont be well accepted.... and this takes energy.... that is why we are so tired.... we want to sleep a lot.... yet many times we cant.....
It sounds like your losses are the losses of what you thought life would be like.... and you feel like you are so unstable....
As you are treading thru your grief..... please be kind to yourself.... eat healthy, get some exercise, if only walking.... I suggest you keep a journal of where the pain is.... what is really bothering you.... meditate....or have some quiet time....
Remember you can only change yourself and your thinking.... you can come to terms with what is happening.... you can learn to have some peace....
If you find this to be so overwhelming.... talk to a professional....
I believe everyone has bumps in the road.... some seem to engulf us.... I wish you the best at climbing out of this...