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04-07-2015 07:46 PM
Relax and enjoy! The concerns of parenthood are just that - the concerns of the parents. You get to have all the fun. Your son and his wife sound as if they're in a better place than many other first time parents.
04-09-2015 09:23 AM
Having twins that were sickly, I felt that I was not a good mom and scared to death that I would make an even worse grandmother. When that baby arrived I just totally fell in love and he is now the light of our lives. I must say, I do make one h&ll of a grandmother too! I love watching and playing with the little guy, there's nothing I wouldn't do for him.
Enjoy!
04-09-2015 10:50 AM
Yes, being a grandmother opens up a lot of new concerns. But just like when you got a DIL, MYOB and keep quiet. It will be fine and I hope you have a wonderful time with the baby. The new parents will appreciate assistance after they too learn to share with all the grandparents.
04-09-2015 11:46 AM
You are going to love this time of your life! Enjoy!!!!!!!
04-09-2015 12:05 PM
On 4/7/2015 starpolisher said:Thanks all of you for your heartfelt responses! I love babies and have been looking forward to being a Grandmother. All kinds of thoughts keep running through my mine. Mostly about weather they will be able to handle all the expenses I hear are involved with raising a baby nowadays. They both have good jobs but I know day care cost a fortune. Years ago when my sons were born I stayed home. DH and I had been married for several years and we had always planned on my not working. It wasn't cost efficient at the time and we didn't have any debt. DS and wife have mortgage, car and other expenses already and have only been married since July. Like most couples nowadays they married later and want to start a family before getting any older. I know things will work themselves out. I guess I feel uneasy because so many changes are happening in my life right now. DH retired in February and I will retire in June. I'm happy I will have the time to be able to spend with my grandchild but I can't help but worry that I won't be able to help financially as much if needed.
I have three beautiful grandchildren and never had any of these thoughts in my mind. I think you are reading too much into what should be a wonderful part of your life.
I think that most, if not all, of us and our children had the same debts such as mortgage, etc. as you described. That is not anything above normal expenses. And we all made it. All grandparents want to help in any way they can. Some are able and some are not. We all want to buy that baby nice things, but we do the best we can. We are not the backup financial assistance plan for our grandchildren. Both my parents and inlaws barely made it paycheck to paycheck, and yet I raised two children without their help. They did what they could. I didn't expect anything more.
Please sit back and enjoy this special time. You will come to find that all this worry and concern was unnecessary and may miss out on the happiness that comes just while anticipating that new and precious life.
04-09-2015 02:42 PM
Just sit back and enjoy. We had some difficult days last fall as our daughter's marriage of 3 months failed and she was already pregnant. I just couldn't see how we were all going to handle her being newly divorced, a minimum income, an 8 year old daughter and how a new baby was going to affect us all! But let me tell you, this child is a gift from God and he is one of the biggest blessings of our lives. Has he altered our plans for the future? Absolutely, but we figure our plans are probably not God's plans for us. God knew this baby before he was formed so we are taking a day at a time. He is perfect! He sleeps all the time and is the happiest child I've ever been around. At 2 months old, he's an answer to a dream we didn't even know we had!
04-09-2015 05:08 PM
On 4/9/2015 jewelfool said:Just sit back and enjoy. We had some difficult days last fall as our daughter's marriage of 3 months failed and she was already pregnant. I just couldn't see how we were all going to handle her being newly divorced, a minimum income, an 8 year old daughter and how a new baby was going to affect us all! But let me tell you, this child is a gift from God and he is one of the biggest blessings of our lives. Has he altered our plans for the future? Absolutely, but we figure our plans are probably not God's plans for us. God knew this baby before he was formed so we are taking a day at a time. He is perfect! He sleeps all the time and is the happiest child I've ever been around. At 2 months old, he's an answer to a dream we didn't even know we had!
Thank you jewelfool. Your words have really touched me! You are absolutely right!!!!
04-09-2015 05:15 PM
Thank you everyone for your advice! I always feel better after hearing from those of you who have gone through whatever it is I'm going through at the time. I must admit that I am a worrier. Those worst case scenarios always seem to pop into my head and usually they turn out to be unwarranted. I'm trying and praying not to be! I really am looking forward to having a grandchild to love!Thanks again!
04-12-2015 05:19 PM
04-13-2015 11:52 PM
On 4/12/2015 Justice4all said: Star polisher, anyone who quotes Bernie Meltzer can handle anything. After all, you are a free babysitter (as am I and my husband), right?
Absolutely!!! By the way starting to feel better!
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