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Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,723
Registered: ‎05-12-2012

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....


@Cakers wrote:

@Tinkrbl44 wrote:

@RetRN   @Nananana59 

 

Oh good grief.    I just think she could have done SO much better by her grandaughter if she actually tried to be helpful. 

 

Personally, I think being encouraging is always a better way to deal with teens, and kids of all ages.   A bit surprised you disagree with that.  

 

As I previously stated, JMO.


@Tinkrbl44   How do you know she didn't try to be helpful.

 

How she handled this is hers and hers alone. 

 

Who is to say she "could have done better"?

 

Because I think you "could have done better" being a tad more empathetic instead of knocking her down.

 


thank you for your kind post.....

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,723
Registered: ‎05-12-2012

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....


@froggy wrote:

Why does she have to wear a mask in her bedroom?


she put her birthday mask on just to take a picture....

Honored Contributor
Posts: 22,125
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....

Life is full of disappointments, and setbacks, and unfairness.  Lots and lots of times things don't go our way.


To me, the proper response is to challenge kids to overcome situations, to make the best of times, to even make something good of bad times in some way.

 

To be successful in life, that's what most of us do.  Many people start out disadvantaged, ignored, from less than good circumstances.  It's overcoming it and making the best of it that sets kids up for life.  Not looking at what you don't have, but for what you might do about it. 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,253
Registered: ‎09-18-2010

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....

My heart goes out to your granddaughter, I'm sure this was not the birthday anyone envisioned it would be. Nor the year. I'm hoping for better days in the near future for your granddaughter and all of us. 

 

What I can do, and what I'm pretty sure @Nananana59 can do also, is empathize with other folks even if I or someone else I know has had it worse. You can still have empathy for folks even when you are going thru bad things too. I wish some folks could realize that. 

 

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,723
Registered: ‎05-12-2012

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....


@Happycat01 wrote:

My heart goes out to your granddaughter, I'm sure this was not the birthday anyone envisioned it would be. Nor the year. I'm hoping for better days in the near future for your granddaughter and all of us. 

 

What I can do, and what I'm pretty sure @Nananana59 can do also, is empathize with other folks even if I or someone else I know has had it worse. You can still have empathy for folks even when you are going thru bad things too. I wish some folks could realize that. 

 

 


thank you...i do have empathy for all the folks that are going through hard times...

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,036
Registered: ‎07-25-2010

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....

[ Edited ]

If you read the long threads when someone here suffers a tragedy, you will see there is a lot of empathy on these boards.

 

I can't get too worked up about a teenager posing in a birthday mask for a picture.  

Sure, it's disappointing. But Nana is going to have plenty of causes for deep grief in this life.  People here are struggling against cancer, have just lost a parent, spouse, child or beloved pet.  

 

Our family buried another beloved cousin last week.

 

 

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,318
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....

If I were a grandma I would feel sad but also proud that my grand d is taking all this very seriously. I see that age group,  all the time, outside doing what used to be normal, in large groups with no masks and I wonder--how many will get the virus, take it home and infect their grand parents or anyone else in their worlds----sure it is hard to postpone these things---but you can't do anything if you are dead!!! 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,143
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....

Better safe than sorry.  Worse things are going on.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,108
Registered: ‎02-19-2014

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....


@alicedee wrote:

If you read the long threads when someone here suffers a tragedy, you will see there is a lot of empathy on these boards.

 

I can't get too worked up about a teenager posing in a birthday mask for a picture.  

Sure, it's disappointing. But Nana is going to have plenty of causes for deep grief in this life.  People here are struggling against cancer, have just lost a parent, spouse, child or beloved pet.  

 

Our family buried another beloved cousin last week.

 

 

 

 


It is not a competition. And if it were, who would want to win that prize?

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr
Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,478
Registered: ‎06-17-2015

Re: I'm a sad Nana today....


@alicedee wrote:

If you read the long threads when someone here suffers a tragedy, you will see there is a lot of empathy on these boards.

 

I can't get too worked up about a teenager posing in a birthday mask for a picture.  

Sure, it's disappointing. But Nana is going to have plenty of causes for deep grief in this life.  People here are struggling against cancer, have just lost a parent, spouse, child or beloved pet.  

 

Our family buried another beloved cousin last week.

 

 

 

 


@alicedee   Nobobdy was asked to get worked up over this.  The OP simply posted how this pandemic was affecting her GD's birthday..

 

We know people have cancer, we know death has happened, we know all about illnesses and hurt and pain.  I am 100% positive that the OP also knows all of this.

 

Her hurt is valid for her and her alone; to diminish it by saying others have it so much worse is unkind.

 

We can be sad for our loved ones and we can be sad for those having a different type of struggle.

 

 

We also do not know where all posters are in their lives; and I'm not 100% sure but I am 99% sure that one can have empathy for others and still feel sad for a beloved GD.

 

When we assign severity and a grade as to who has it worse, we have lost the ability to be open-minded and empathetic. 

 

If the poster had ever denigrated another poster's loss, that would be one thing.  She never did.

 

I am truly sorry for your losses; but you also have no idea what I go through with some of my loved ones, either.  Pre-Covid and continuing.

 

So instead of mocking and trying to top another person's story, why not just either not respond or at least give an "I understand".

 

After all, she loves her GD, the birthday IS important, and we all get it-life has no guarantees and the lessons are lifelong, not just on a birthday.

 

How important is it to lecture the OP about the trials of life?  I'm sure she knows, as we all do.

 

Again, I'm sorry for your pain and hurt; yet that is yours and yours alone.  We can empathize with you and we can empathize with the OP.

 

This constant "someone else's situation is worse than yours" is tiring.

And a turn-off as we can see the diminishing number of posters around here.

""Out beyond the ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing, there is a field. I will meet you there." -Rumi