Community Chat

[Krimpette]

I see nothing wrong with letting people know that you're going to be turning off the phone for a bit while you try to begin your healing process.  I feel for you because it's already so difficult for you, even though everyone means well.  Hugs.

[esmerelda]

@CrazyKittyLvr2  As I seldom read in Wellness I was unaware of what you've been going through.

I am so very sorry for your loss.

[cherry]

@CrazyKittyLvr2  we can't help how we feel, Just take it 1 hr at a time if you have to. @cakers gave you some good advice

The only thing I know  to tell you is   this too shall pass.   God love you

[Ketra]

---

@CrazyKittyLvr2 wrote:

@newname0   I know some people would give anything to have a sister like mine and I am very lucky,  I feel like such a jerk even talking about her concern. But between her callls I am also getting multiple calls from my numerous in-laws,  my friends and neighbors. I am going to have to put out the word to give me a couple of days and hope I don't sound like an ungrateful witch.

---

@CrazyKittyLvr2 I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your husband. You have to tell people that you appreciate their help so much, but you need a little time and space right now. You will contact them soon, but now you need some time by yourself to process everything. They will understand, and if some persist, just don’t answer the phone or door until you are ready. I will pray for you and your departed husband. The Lord will get you through this, minute by minute, hour by hour, and day by day until you are much stronger and at peace with what has happened. When everything gets to be too much, give it all to him to handle. (I do it out loud, verbally) That's what he wants, to take our burdens from us if we’ll let him. 

[ScarletDove]

It sounds like you just need the ability to breath in private in your own way....there are some wonderful ideas and suggestions here and perhaps some of them will help you find a balance for you right now!  Take care of yourself!  Just remember, we are all here, please reach out when you need someone to listen, or a shoulder on which to lean!

[Kitlynn]

Her heart is in the right place and no doubt she is very concerned about you. There is however nothing wrong with you very nicely just telling her you need some time alone to sort through your own feelings and grief. Let her know you will call her if you need anything and that you appreciate all she has done and is doing for you and your family. Sometimes when people love us and there is a hard situation to deal with the only way they know to help is to try and make everything alright for us. I am sorry for your loss and prayers for you and your family as you go through this hard time.

[Wsmom]

@CrazyKittyLvr2, I just went over to the Wellness section and got caught up on your posts.  I am so very, very sorry for your loss.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.  As far as your sister, venting here is a great way to deal with it.  <hugs>

[Libbylady]

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I am reminded of what a friend did when his wife passed 6 years ago.

He was inundated with phone calls and each caller wanted to hear "the whole story". 

He was exhausted by the effort to answer calls and letters.  He divided friends & family into several groups depending on how close he felt to them.  An email to each group seemed to be enough for most to understand that he appreciated their concerns but wanted private time.  Very close friends & family got a short daily email each morning so they knew he was OK, and they didn't need to call & check on him constantly.

This method seemed to work and he was able to control the calls.

[LilacTree]

She just wants to be there for you.  Perhaps you could just tell all the others who are just friends and acquaintances that you need time.  It depends on who you feel closer to.

I wish my sister was still here to console me and help me through my bad times, as I was and would still be for her.

I am sorry for your loss.

[stevieb]

@CrazyKittyLvr2  Consider using your sister's desire to help and support you to your advantage. Ask her to return calls to those friends, neighbors and family who are less close. That way, you don't have to do it, she feels like she's helping you, and you're not in the position of having to shut her down.