Community Chat

[Tenners]

We've moved a couple of times since we were married...to upstate NY, didn't like farm country and everything interesting was too far away, couldn't relate to the people. Then to south Florida. Really just more culture shock. Then to North Florida. We've been her a long time but it's never REALLY felt like home. I love the weather. I always worked. I/we had scads of friends when we lived in our original hometown. Everybody was always over at our place. Lots of fun and friendship. I would have been so happy to stay there. All that changed when we moved. I feel like I've lost a lot of fun over the years as we lost touch with our friends...they moved far away too and the ones that stayed moved into different friend circles. Never found any kindred spirits here. My friends are my family who I treasure, but even though they followed me to Florida, their work took them to different cities so we don't get together very much because of work and distance. I feel like I've lost a lot by moving. I know people will say I didn't try, but I did. Anybody else feel the same way?

[PinkyPetunia]

Seems like you are pining away for something that doesn't exist. You seem to think life would be perfect if you stayed in your hometown but that probably wouldn't have happened. Neighborhoods change, children grow up and move away, friendships come and go. The friendships you think will last forever sometimes do not.

Be grateful for the good things in life you have now. Life is short. You say you gave up a lot by moving but can't it also be said that you gained a lot through your moves?

I've made a lot of moves and lived in several states. I think it's broadened my outlook and good things happened in all those different locations. I cannot imagine living in my hometown my entire life and am glad I have moved on. Good luck to you.

[qualitygal]

Maybe because of vacationers and retired snowbirds? I see it as a vacation fun place.. but people live there.

[Snowpuppy]

I completely understand. Having moved many times and several states it is sometimes difficult to relate to people in an area. Different people, different cultures.

That said, DS and I have talked about moving back "home" to our hometown. It has a romantic notion to it but the practicality isn't there. I could transfer but the jobs available to him in his field would be hard to come by.

His friends have their lives, all work f/t. And my friends and I have drifted apart over the years that I've been gone.

If you want to know what "home" would be like you can plan a visit for as long as is practical and see if you feel the same when your visit is over.

[151949]

I felt that I would lose my friends when we moved to Florida to retire as well but that hasn't happened at all. We see a lot of them during the summer when we are home and we see even more of them over the winter when they come down to get some sun time and stay with us. We are fortunate to have my DH's family here so for days like holidays we do spend time with them. My dearest friend came to visit 2 years ago in the winter and loved our little town - then when we were home for the summer she asked if she could come back with us to look for a home here - she found one and moved totally that winter. Plus another couple who we are friends with did the same thing - except they moved this past summer. So we are sorta slowly moving our friends here with us.

I agree with the first reply that the OP seems to be yearning for something that just isn't there anymore. She needs to seek out friends among the people where she lives and works and worships.It isn't difficult to make friends when you live where almost everyone is displaced from somewhere and are also seeking new friends.

I find Florida to be very very nice and I love living here. I would not want to have to live back in the cold and snow.

[RedTop]

I was born in WV, and my intentions are to die in WV. I cannot imagine leaving my home in these mountains for any reason, let alone for better weather. This is my home; my family was living in the area where I live now, when WV became a state in 1863. I would never be satisfied to live anywhere else on earth.

[Zhills]

On 12/19/2014 RedTop said: I was born in WV, and my intentions are to die in WV. I cannot imagine leaving my home in these mountains for any reason, let alone for better weather. This is my home; my family was living in the area where I live now, when WV became a state in 1863. I would never be satisfied to live anywhere else on earth.

That is how I feel about beautiful FLORIDA!

[Zhills]

sorry

[jeanlake]

Hi Tenners. I appreciate the sage comments Pinky Petunia shared. My take away from your post is to live in the present and think gratitudes throughout the day. There's something magical that happens when our brain and heart connect in this way. And that energy flows into our lives. I live in the hometown I was born in. I travel a lot -- but even though I'm surrounded by immediate and extended family and friends - I have this nagging feeling that I would have enjoyed living somewhere else. I'm going to toss those nagging thoughts and be grateful for what I do have. I hope 2015 brings you the comfort and ease you are seeking.

[Zhills]

Tenners, I am sorry you do not feel at home where you are in Florida. I have lived here all of my life yet I can easily relate to your story and your feelings. Even though this is 'home' so many people have either moved or passed away that it has lost that homey feeling. I've been in this area all my life but the area has changed, not just me. Where I am now is really as much home as anywhere I have ever lived. I love it here. However, I have gone through times that I did not feel this way! It just seems to change. Hope it gets better for you soon. Happy 2015!