Community Chat

[151949]

Clearly, there are a lot of people who hide behind the anonymity of the internet and act poorly. There are also people who have mental health issues. This applies to all anonymous internet sites , not just this one.

[Hooty]

NC Bandwagon, to tell you honestly, this has been going on forever on these boards! I joined 8 yrs ago and I was outraged as a troll, I was told that I was someone that had comeback under a new name! I was shocked, this was the first forum that I had ever joined and I had no idea people that didn't even know you could be so mean and hateful! I even had a stalker, she was very mean and I was really scared of her that she would find out who I was and try to do something to me! She no longer posts here, but I will never forget her and her hatefulness! I have met some nice people here and met some not so nice people here! There are two that I have remained friends with for many years to this day, I hope to meet them in person one day!

I think hiding behind a computer has a lot to do with it, but I have learned that there are just mean and vicious people in the world! I have often said that some appear that they are posting from mental institutions or even prison!

[Chrystaltree2]

Go back in time and ask Eve.....

[151949]

On 12/29/2014 Hooty said:

NC Bandwagon, to tell you honestly, this has been going on forever on these boards! I joined 8 yrs ago and I was outraged as a troll, I was told that I was someone that had comeback under a new name! I was shocked, this was the first forum that I had ever joined and I had no idea people that didn't even know you could be so mean and hateful! I even had a stalker, she was very mean and I was really scared of her that she would find out who I was and try to do something to me! She no longer posts here, but I will never forget her and her hatefulness! I have met some nice people here and met some not so nice people here! There are two that I have remained friends with for many years to this day, I hope to meet them in person one day!

I think hiding behind a computer has a lot to do with it, but I have learned that there are just mean and vicious people in the world! I have often said that some appear that they are posting from mental institutions or even prison!

My experiences here are exactly the same as yours.

[chickenbutt]

There is some serious ugliness on this board, and has been for some time now. I remember, several years ago, when one poster started a hate board of her own. She would come here and act all 'best friends' with the posters here, then go there and, along with her buddies, say hideous, horrible things about the same people. They even created demeaning emoticons and named them after several posters here.

The funny part was that they thought it was private, until a bunch of the stuff got posted here, including the mean emoticons. oops! That was when I realized what that person was all about. I don't remember who the other members were, but that one was one I never forgot because she still is probably one of the most passive-aggressive people I've encountered.

Anyway, the moral of the story is that I guess SOME women feel good about being mean and hateful toward others. I've known women like this and it usually turns out that they just don't like themselves very much and it makes them feel better about themselves to try and drag others down. I don't feel anger toward people like that anymore. After all, my own so-called mother was that kind of self-loathing person. I do feel badly for them. But that is what I think it boils down to.

[reese2]

I don't know which board you're referring to, CB, but I personally have posted graphics from another site that were ugly and demeaning to several posters here just to prove a point.

I don't know why some people act the way that they do, but I don't see it changing anytime soon.

I do believe there are some "new" posters who change their nics just to mock and ridicule other people anonymously or to inflame and create drama. We're already anonymous, but it's nice to know as best you can who you're talking to on this board. The alternate nics are irritating.

[YorkieonmyPillow]

On 12/29/2014 Hooty said:

I have often said that some appear that they are posting from mental institutions or even prison!

LOL!!!!!!

[jeanlake]

Hi NC. Mean posters are rare, IMO, but do temporarily leave an ugly mark. Stink the place up a bit. It's generally someone who is perpetually cranky, unhappy, powerless, wounded or insecure. Have you heard the phrase, hurting people hurt people?

People hide behind screens. (Ha - remember the Wizard of Oz?) I remember taking an online college class. A guy named Mike was in two of my online classes and he routinely sniped, growled and put down ideas and comments from students in the classes. Mike was also outwardly disrespectful to both instructors -- Ph.D in Psychology and well-known mediation attorney. Of course, although we never met Mike in person, we all developed opinions about the illusive Mike. My last class was offered via in-person; classroom. During first-day class introductions we met the famous Mike. There he was. Scrunched down in the back of the classroom offering no eye contact, giving the appearance of a mousey character. Rarely heard him speak the entire semester. Lost his bark. That was an eye opening experience for me. I think about Mike when I read some of the usual suspects' rude and negative comments on the Q boards. They are 'Mike' to me. Nothing more.

I understand what you are saying, NC. The mean comments remind me of the anonymous SLAM Books that floated around middle school/junior high hallways. I remember reading this about myself -- I was 'the girl with the dead mother.' She passed away Easter weekend, 7th grade. Cancer. I think it took two weeks for that phrase to surface in the slam book. Anonymously, of course. Dark hearts.

[jubilant]

I think it's best to respond to the troublemakers with as few words as possible. Once you react and ""lose your cool"" they have won. That's what they wanted in the first place and that is why they say what they say. They are insecure people and it's really very sad as they usually end up lonely old people because (without help) they rarely change. We need to learn not to be shocked by their actions. They just love the ""shock value"" they think they have and actually do have if you let it! They are some of the smartest manipulators around. I have said this before and I will say it again...because it is something my Dad taught me.....They are watching where you tie your goat and like Dad said....""Don't let them see where you tie your goat"" I don't know about you.... but I don't care to give a person that much power over me. I wish we could all come to the point where we see it for what it is and not be quite so sensitive to it or shocked by it. It just fuels their fire. I am not running anyone down here for venting....I do understand and wished I would have learned this much earlier in my life than I did. It would have saved me a lot of pain.

[jeanlake]

"They are watching where you tie your goat," And like Dad said...."Don't let them see where you tie your goat."

Jubilant, I love your dad's words. Dr. William Ury, Mediation guru and negotiator, advises us to remain a mystery to people who are not in our inner circle of trust. I wish Dr. Ury would have completed the sentence with your dad's wise words. Again, love it. Thanks for sharing