Community Chat

[BlingQueen022]

Another reason why I love animals more then people. People stink, PERIOD!

[Hooty]

On 12/27/2014 So Happy Girl said:

I am hanging tight until she calls. I had a lovely dinner out tonight with another friend.

Don't worry, I am resilient and I have quietly brushed away many friends who cannot find it within them to be courteous and to show up when they say they will. It's distressing that I find this to be more of the norm than the exception.

I will say that the teenage daughter is a problem. My friend is not independent of her and the daughter commits a lot of emotional blackmail.

That is still no excuse for her not calling to let you know she was not coming, how long does that take???

That was a beautiful chandelier you bought for her, I would return it if possible and use the money for yourself! You deserve it!

[shamalamadingdong4]

On 12/28/2014 Hooty said:

On 12/27/2014 So Happy Girl said:

I am hanging tight until she calls. I had a lovely dinner out tonight with another friend.

Don't worry, I am resilient and I have quietly brushed away many friends who cannot find it within them to be courteous and to show up when they say they will. It's distressing that I find this to be more of the norm than the exception.

I will say that the teenage daughter is a problem. My friend is not independent of her and the daughter commits a lot of emotional blackmail.

That is still no excuse for her not calling to let you know she was not coming, how long does that take???

That was a beautiful chandelier you bought for her, I would return it if possible and use the money for yourself! You deserve it!

I agree.

[Anniecamp]

I guess I have a question. Was the lady sure she was invited for this year? Or, was it just mentioned in passing and considered (by you) to be an invitation? In any case, I'm so sorry that this happened.

[RedTop]

I suspect the 16 year old daughter is more troublesome than suspected, and has a lot to do with this situation.

[BellaPaprika]

Your "friend" is a user. If you make the decision (and sometimes it happens that we have to in life) that being used is a price you're willing to pay for the other benefits of her "friendship", then carry on as if nothing happened. If you decide that you are better off not having this person walk all over you, then tell her so and end the relationship. I don't have to tell you that she is not really your friend. You already know that.

[Financialgrl]

On 12/27/2014 Kachina624 said: I think your long friendship is ending or has ended and you just haven't accepted it yet. This "friend's" treatment of you is deplorable and you've accepted it on her terms. I wouldn't call her again and would find another person to go to the symphony. I'd love to have you for a friend.

Absolutely agree with this post. Scarier still, your post makes it sound like you are sitting around waiting for her to call so you can "softly" let her know you are upset. Old saying about people treating you the way you allow them and she knows she's done wrong. She'd be so gone from my life (unless, and only unless) you find out she was in the hospital in a coma or holding vigil at the foot of the bed of her dying daughter!

[Plaid Pants]

On 12/27/2014 So Happy Girl said:

This Christmas I invited my friend over for Christmas dinner. She has been my best friend since kindergarten and she is recently divorced. Her children ( 21 and 16) spend Christmas morning with her and then go to the father for dinner.

Last year I invited her for dinner and 2 hours before it was to be served she called and said that her daughter was sick, then she said her daughter wanted to come to my home for dinner, and then at 6:30 she called and said her daughter didn't want to leave the house again because she took off her makeup and could I pack up dinner and bring it to her home ( 50 miles away). Needless to day I ate alone.

This year I invited her again, please understand that I have had Christmas alone for the past 36 years, a fact that she is well aware of. I made my traditional Beef Wellington, brussel sprouts, potatoes Dauphanoise, and an apple pie.

Not only did she not show up, she hasn't called, texted or emailed me. It's now Saturday. I haven't contacted her because I don't want to say anything unkind. I am trying to just let the inconsiderateness of this event fade into memory and keep our friendship.

Full disclaimer: She had knee surgery on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. Not only did I take her to the hospital and home, I also cooked a full Thanksgiving meal for her at her home because her children were with their father.

Oh, enough of my rant. Thank you.

Two words: Dump her.

[qbetzforreal]

Maybe she didn't want to make the drive or maybe something happened to her or her children. You don't know, you didn't call her. I use to have a Christmas Eve tradition of going out breakfast with a friend. We did it for years, then slowly she wasn't available, then she stopped mentioning it. I got the clue that the tradition was over. Not our friendship just the tradition. Maybe the tradition is over but not the friendship.

[Drythe]

I am sorry this happened to you, it hurts when people you care about treat you so poorly.

Once I had a similar 'best friend.' After years of being taken advantage of I finally realized that people who really care about you don't treat you this way.