Community Chat

[RibbonsRosesRainbows]

I have always had to be a strong person from a very young age since my mom was sick with MS......so when I was 12 I knew that I would not have a life like my mother being married to a man that was cruel but I did have several that were........but at 18 I went to therapy....all on my own 1 hour from my home where I lived with my mom and step dad and brothers and sister........one thing they said for me to get braces so I would not hide my mouth when I smiled and at 20 I did that and worked three jobs to pay for the braces.......and then I did smile and still do but they have gone a bit crooked......they now know you have to wear a retainer forever.....ugh well......my front teeth are fine so I don't worry about my bottom teeth being crooked again.......although what a mess because way back it was $3,500........and I stayed in therapy for 20 years off and on........NOW

some where weird and some were crazy and I got out of their office but I had four that were amazing...........one lady who I got so mad at and walk out told me the truth and after two months I keep soaking in what she said........and I called her and went back to see her and told her I was so mad at her but she was right...........the issue was I dated men that were successful and very handsome but they had issues......usually alcohol and one had a drug problem.........she told me that I was not healthy relationship wise......that I was sick and I told her that I did not drink or do drugs so how could I be unhealthy relationship wise? Well, if you date someone messed up with issues then you are as sick as they are even if you don't have the same habits you are with a sick person and if you are not sick relationship wise then you would not be with that person AND SHE WAS SO CORRECT.........she did not know I would come back but I had to because I saw the truth..........how I wish I could see her now but she does not take my insurance and she lives way too far for me to travel..........so I am open to always learning and being better and I will be this way the rest of my life...........so I know now what not to date........but I have to have a healthy mother son relationship and they will show me how...........because my mom was like my sister and not my mom we had a friendship relationship........not mother daughter and that is what I did with my son and that was not healthy......

I am not a fool and I admit when I really believe I am in the wrong. I won't be better if I don't listen to the expert.....I will be just wasting my time. Some of you ladies have no idea how hard I work on being better every day.........it is just at times I get upset with people on here that are unkind or say things that are hateful not knowing me........but that is childish when I respond to that.........

[RibbonsRosesRainbows]

I keep reading posts saying I am going to bale out.........well.........if I did not want to be the best I can be I would not even go.....I want honest and I always told my boss' and friends I love CONSTRUCTIVE CRITIZIM..........BUT CONSTRUCTIVE not mean.......

[Surfnturf]

RRR, you don't have to be stuck living in a rural town because of finances. Most cities, or counties, offer dwellings for seniors, 55 or 60 years old and up. The rent is based on a sliding scale according to your income. It wouldn't hurt to look into it. Some have waiting lists, but you could put your name on one, and when your name rises to the top of the list, you could move. Another good thing about places like that is there are activities, and many opportunities for friendship with people around your age. If you truly want to live in a larger metropolis, pick an area, and place your name on their waiting list.

[RibbonsRosesRainbows]

You know wookie since I am only 57 I can save my money and when I am 62 get on a list and move........then I can be in a big city.....this gives me a plan.......and I can stick to it.......it will be my dream. One reason I stay here is that I am 2 1/2 hours from my brain injury doctor and then......here my doctor gives me pain medicine and sleeping medicine and I don't know about moving to a big city and someone taking care of me but I will not worry about it now.......I won't go until I am 62 anyway.........shame I can't go to Houston several times a year and stay two weeks at a time......that would give me enough of the big city.......oh well......and when I have gone to my half brothers in Dallas they never go anywhere I want to go.....like the museum and parks.........they are busy with sports and I understand that but I would love to see the sites..........anyway........save my money and I can do more........

[straykatz]

On 5/30/2014 RibbonsRosesRainbows said:

You know wookie since I am only 57 I can save my money and when I am 62 get on a list and move........then I can be in a big city.....this gives me a plan.......and I can stick to it.......it will be my dream. One reason I stay here is that I am 2 1/2 hours from my brain injury doctor and then......here my doctor gives me pain medicine and sleeping medicine and I don't know about moving to a big city and someone taking care of me but I will not worry about it now.......I won't go until I am 62 anyway.........shame I can't go to Houston several times a year and stay two weeks at a time......that would give me enough of the big city.......oh well......and when I have gone to my half brothers in Dallas they never go anywhere I want to go.....like the museum and parks.........they are busy with sports and I understand that but I would love to see the sites..........anyway........save my money and I can do more........

RRR...I understand perfectly...my DH had brain surgery several years ago and the thought of moving away from his neurologist and surgery center is scary for him....when we do come to a point where we decide to move either for job relocation or retirement we will have to look into options to ensure he can get the same kind of care he gets here in our current area.

[ROMARY]

Lots of nice folks here........ Just as in life, there are folks around us that are wishing us a better life. Always keep the positive advice close to your heart. No matter what, there are always a few positive people to remind us to try our best to move onward and upward, in a very positive way. Also, every little (or big) thing that we see/hear on TV, radio, etc., there are always a variety of opinions........just focus on the positive. Try to have a nice, restful evening, RRR.

[Cakers1]

On 5/30/2014 RibbonsRosesRainbows said:

I have always had to be a strong person from a very young age since my mom was sick with MS.....

...........the issue was I dated men that were successful and very handsome but they had issues......usually alcohol and one had a drug problem.........she told me that I was not healthy relationship wise......that I was sick and I told her that I did not drink or do drugs so how could I be unhealthy relationship wise? Well, if you date someone messed up with issues then you are as sick as they are even if you don't have the same habits you are with a sick person and if you are not sick relationship wise then you would not be with that person AND SHE WAS SO CORRECT...........so I am open to always learning and being better and I will be this way the rest of my life...........so I know now what not to date........but I have to have a healthy mother son relationship and they will show me how...........because my mom was like my sister and not my mom we had a friendship relationship........not mother daughter and that is what I did with my son and that was not healthy......

I am not a fool and I admit when I really believe I am in the wrong. I won't be better if I don't listen to the expert.....I will be just wasting my time. Some of you ladies have no idea how hard I work on being better every day.........it is just at times I get upset with people on here that are unkind or say things that are hateful not knowing me........but that is childish when I respond to that.........

R3: First, I'm so sorry to read your mom had MS. Believe me, I totally understand the devastation MS can cause.

As far as relationships with a substance abuse, it's true. The sober person is actually sicker trying to control and cure the user.

You said you are open to learning and being better and that's what life is - so you are on the right path. It may have its twists and turns but it will always lead you to a better place.

Don't worry about what you see as unkind and hateful remarks; your perception may not always be accurate if a poster is being sincere; sometimes posters do not express themselves very well and words can be miscontrued, depending upon where you are emotionally at that moment.

I cannot comment on where you will be with your son; I just wish the best for you.

You may question why you can't have the relationship you want but remember one thing - "it's not a question but a lesson learned in time" - from the band Green Day.

Somebody once handed me something written down by them on a piece of paper - "wishing you the peace and serenity of giving up all hope of having a better past".

Be well, R3.

[RibbonsRosesRainbows]

On 5/30/2014 straykatz said:

On 5/30/2014 RibbonsRosesRainbows said:

You know wookie since I am only 57 I can save my money and when I am 62 get on a list and move........then I can be in a big city.....this gives me a plan.......and I can stick to it.......it will be my dream. One reason I stay here is that I am 2 1/2 hours from my brain injury doctor and then......here my doctor gives me pain medicine and sleeping medicine and I don't know about moving to a big city and someone taking care of me but I will not worry about it now.......I won't go until I am 62 anyway.........shame I can't go to Houston several times a year and stay two weeks at a time......that would give me enough of the big city.......oh well......and when I have gone to my half brothers in Dallas they never go anywhere I want to go.....like the museum and parks.........they are busy with sports and I understand that but I would love to see the sites..........anyway........save my money and I can do more........

RRR...I understand perfectly...my DH had brain surgery several years ago and the thought of moving away from his neurologist and surgery center is scary for him....when we do come to a point where we decide to move either for job relocation or retirement we will have to look into options to ensure he can get the same kind of care he gets here in our current area.

I totally understand and it is scary........but really when I am 65 I am probably not going to see my brain doctor anymore......he can't do anything for me anyway anymore......I will just need a good family doctor.........still with all going on who knows what the next seven years will be like. I went to get apples this week and they were $2.59 a pound.......crazy............

[muttmom]

Sometimes your posts are confusing. You say your brain doctor can do nothing for you. So why must you remain close to him? What about the doctor who is taking care of your incurable disease? Is he or she the same doctor who treats your sleep disorder?

Of course if you are uncomfortable answering my questions I understand.