Hello. I was here yesterday but didn't have time to post this. In case anyone is interested, I called him yesterday. Didn't want to do it face to face. I can't type or remember word for word, but the conversation basically went like this. I calmly said
"I have something to say, but please let me finish before you say anything. I know you had a woman over recently. That was the reason why I was upset. I could hear her, heard you in the bedroom and heard you walking her out the door. You know Im not a snoop. These walls and floors are so thin I couldn't help hearing. I know when we had that conversation in August about how we felt about each other, we left it at we'll see what happens when the time comes. I told you in spite of how we felt, I didn't expect you to wait for me so long until my divorce. So I know I shouldn't be upset over this woman, but I was. I can't help how I feel, right or wrong. On the other hand, I want you to be happy and I don't want this to ruin our friendship. It means a lot to me, more than any third party. I hope we can remain good friends in spite of this. I just wish you had told me before, so it wouldn't have been such a surprise."
Then he said:
"I thought that was why you were upset. That's why I called you. I knew we'd have to talk about this sooner or later. I know you know about my problems, but I want to say this anyway. Please understand that I have been through a rotten divorce and still having ongoing problems with her. We spent so much time going to court and getting nowhere. She's so unreasonable and besides all that she's trying to alienate me from my daughter who's too young to understand what she's doing, so I'm worried she may be influenced by her lies. Even our mutual friends see what she's doing and tried to talk to her about it. She told them off and they're no longer friends. I'm very unhappy and all I do is go to work, come home, think about all these things, go to bed and start the next day the same way. You're not free and still have stuff going on with him. I go out on the weekends just to get my mind off of all of this.
I haven't been in a relationship since summer of 2012 and I don't want to say too much about this woman, but I'll say this. She's separated, she has 2 small kids and this is a casual thing. I don't want to be serious with anyone and she knows that. It's only been going on for a little more than a month. I don't know what's going to happen or how long it will last, but that's all it is. Do you remember when I told you I felt like you were a blessing from God to me? Well I still feel that way and it won't change. I'm so glad we had this talk and that you still want to remain close like we always were, because I was was worried about that. I hope you understand."
That was the main conversation. We talked a little more and ended on a good note. Then this morning he texted me if he could down for a few minutes. I said yes. My daughter was asleep yet. He wished me a happy new year and ended up staying about an hour and we talked about things just like always. I didn't bring this woman up at all and neither did he. I guess I'll have my up and down days. Yesterday was pretty up. Today is not.
Thank you for listening.
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