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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,633
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: Hungry Families this Year

We donate $ to our local homeless shelter monthly and have been doing it for a couple of decades now. 

That is just one of several charities we donate to regularly.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,121
Registered: ‎02-19-2014

Re: Hungry Families this Year

[ Edited ]

@prettychis wrote:

@proudlyfromNJ wrote:

@prettychis wrote:

I also find it hard to imagine if your family is starving why you won't give up on some of the expenses you have that are not urgent needs. I have seen many people asking everyone they know for help meanwhile they have not given up one thing that costs them money. Cable tv, streaming services, etc.. Used to be people would give up everything before they asked for help. And would take any job they could get to put food on the table. 
That said I'm sure some people are truly doing their best and still struggling. But times are much different and some people think they can't live without some specific material things. 


@prettychis  I haven't seen anyone asking for help. These must be people you know if you know they haven't given up anything. How do people know all this? Are they at food banks in a Mercedes talking on iPhones? I'm sure I am missing something.


Mercedes really? No I mentioned the things that most people have that they can and should give up if they are struggling to pay bills. I have empathy for those who are struglling to survive but struggling is not always the same from one person to another. Not being able to get your nails done or you hair highlighted is not a true struggle. 


You're kidding right? There has been a lot of complaining here about not getting hair highlighted and nails done. Lots of folks in this forum consider themselves to be suffering intolerably when they can't do it. If it's painful for them, I'd imagine doing without is painful for everybody else too.

 

When you pay it forward and buy the next person in line's coffee at Starbucks or Dunkins, you do realize that that person is not suffering deeply from being otherwise unable to get a coffee, right? We do nice things to be nice because we want a nice world for ourselves and others. It's a more pleasant way to live.

 

I don't demand that someone be homeless and naked with ribs showing before I want to help them. That would be kind of sick and taking pleasure in another's suffering, in my opinion.

 

ETA: If you want the economy to recover, putting more money out in circulation does help. If I give money to a family member who is struggling, they will use some of it in their community, increasing the money flow in the area, helping the local businesses. If enough families have to cut back completely, those businesses suddenly don't get paid and have to close, putting the families who own them into the same dire situation. It can spiral downwards indefinitely if you want it to.

 

And using examples of conmen and criminals is kind of out of place. There are also awful people who abuse their positions in charities to commit fraud and abuse the people who go to them for help. That has nothing to do with anything. It's just a fact of life that there are grifters in all walks of life, it's not an excuse to be apathetic or to join them.

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,575
Registered: ‎09-05-2014

Re: Hungry Families this Year

Color me naive, but I'm not believing that someone who is hungry used the household food budget to go get their nails done.  I guess I don't live in an area where that seems to be a common occurrence. 

 

When the ever growing number of panhandlers here tell me they're hungry, I tend to believe them and do what I can. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,114
Registered: ‎08-21-2014

Re: Hungry Families this Year


@JohnnyEager wrote:

Color me naive, but I'm not believing that someone who is hungry used the household food budget to go get their nails done.  I guess I don't live in an area where that seems to be a common occurrence. 

 

When the ever growing number of panhandlers here tell me they're hungry, I tend to believe them and do what I can. 


You said it not me. Yes some people do all those things then wonder where the money for the rent went. I did not say all people. Not in one of my comments did I say that. But if you think some people aren't so clueless that they think nails and other things are priorities over paying more important bills oh well. And again I said some. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,114
Registered: ‎08-21-2014

Re: Hungry Families this Year


@Porcelain wrote:

@prettychis wrote:

@proudlyfromNJ wrote:

@prettychis wrote:

I also find it hard to imagine if your family is starving why you won't give up on some of the expenses you have that are not urgent needs. I have seen many people asking everyone they know for help meanwhile they have not given up one thing that costs them money. Cable tv, streaming services, etc.. Used to be people would give up everything before they asked for help. And would take any job they could get to put food on the table. 
That said I'm sure some people are truly doing their best and still struggling. But times are much different and some people think they can't live without some specific material things. 


@prettychis  I haven't seen anyone asking for help. These must be people you know if you know they haven't given up anything. How do people know all this? Are they at food banks in a Mercedes talking on iPhones? I'm sure I am missing something.


Mercedes really? No I mentioned the things that most people have that they can and should give up if they are struggling to pay bills. I have empathy for those who are struglling to survive but struggling is not always the same from one person to another. Not being able to get your nails done or you hair highlighted is not a true struggle. 


You're kidding right? There has been a lot of complaining here about not getting hair highlighted and nails done. Lot's of folks in this forum consider themselves to be suffering intolerably when they can't do it. If it's painful for them, I'd imagine doing without is painful for everybody else too.

 

When you pay it forward and buy the next person in line's coffee at Starbucks or Dunkins, you do realize that that person is not suffering deeply from being otherwise unable to get a coffee, right? We do nice things to be nice because we want a nice world for ourselves and others. It's a more pleasant way to live.

 

I don't demand that someone be homeless and naked with ribs showing before I want to help them. That would be kind of sick and taking pleasure in another's suffering, in my opinion.


Where did I say someone needs to be homeless and skin and bones starving to be struggling? So shocked that someone is honest you must make what I said more than what it was. I guess I proved that all those who are now bashing an opinion aren't perfect saints. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,441
Registered: ‎05-01-2010

Re: Hungry Families this Year

I just want to know how everyone personally know these cheaters they speak of. I don't doubt there are some but from what I am reading here everything is is an assumption or speculation.  

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,907
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Hungry Families this Year

I think you should help a person because you want to and because it's the right thing to do. Some years ago we (meaning many of us in an office) donated to a local woman who was struggling financially due to an illness in her family.  I was shocked when a few of the people who donated money to her were angry because she used some of the money to buy her kid X-mas presents instead of going toward rent, utilities, etc. I was angry by their putting strings attached to their donations.  People CAN be quite judgmental of others!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,121
Registered: ‎02-19-2014

Re: Hungry Families this Year


@prettychis wrote:

You're kidding right? There has been a lot of complaining here about not getting hair highlighted and nails done. Lot's of folks in this forum consider themselves to be suffering intolerably when they can't do it. If it's painful for them, I'd imagine doing without is painful for everybody else too.

 

When you pay it forward and buy the next person in line's coffee at Starbucks or Dunkins, you do realize that that person is not suffering deeply from being otherwise unable to get a coffee, right? We do nice things to be nice because we want a nice world for ourselves and others. It's a more pleasant way to live.

 

I don't demand that someone be homeless and naked with ribs showing before I want to help them. That would be kind of sick and taking pleasure in another's suffering, in my opinion.


Where did I say someone needs to be homeless and skin and bones starving to be struggling? So shocked that someone is honest you must make what I said more than what it was. I guess I proved that all those who are now bashing an opinion aren't perfect saints. 


That's the only way you could know just from looking at them that they needed the food you would be providing. Otherwise you'd have no way to know if they secretly were better off than your philanthropy limit. I try to be honest, by and large, just like you do. And I doubt anyone here considers themselves to be perfect saints.

 

I'll leave you to get in the last word here. I don't think you're awful, by the way. I just think it's hard for me to completely understand what you mean sometimes because of the way you state some of your opinions.

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,735
Registered: ‎08-19-2014

Re: Hungry Families this Year

[ Edited ]

  One of my pet peeves involves food insecurity. I've been volunteering & donating  money to my local food bank for around 30 years. It absolutely breaks my heart to see so many people struggle to put food on the table.

 The lines at my food bank are longer than I've ever seen them.Luckily, there's been enough food to distribute to everyone. I've gotten to talk to some of these people.They are good decent individuals who through no fault of their own have lost their jobs.A lot of them are ashamed.I tell them not to be.That they should feel proud that they live in a community that can help.I tell them there is no shame in asking for help.A lot of them sign up to volunteer because they want to give back in some way.

  "There but for the grace of God go I".

 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,792
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: Hungry Families this Year

I was going to sit this one out.

 

I keep thinking of the cheaters who got PPE money and bought luxury cars or the uber weathy that pay no taxes. 

 

So if a family gets $30.00 worth of free food but has a new Iphone, I'll not judge.