Wow, when I left yesterday afternoon, I was post #12. Guess there have been lots of opinions. To those of you kind enough to give thoughts based on what I ACTUALLY said, and not presume or project your own stuff into it, or create some make-believe fabrications, I thank you. Thank you also to those that gave me GENUINE birthday wishes, I appreciate it.
I don't feel like I owe anyone any more explanation, but since some have taken pleasure in using this topic to slam me, I'll clarify a few things. I must say there are some really lovely, kind and sweet ladies in this forum..... and then there are just some really mean-spirited women who seem to get joy from trying to bring others down.
I just only finished reading the entire thread right now. I stay logged in for hours at a time, sometimes days. Voyager, I'm not sure why you are so consumed with me being signed in or not, and your comment that I must be lurking and reading was total nonsense. You really think I was going to hang around here and let a bunch of snarky people like you try to ruin my birthday? Think again. I can stay logged in for days, as long as I don't reboot my computer. Many times my comp goes into hibernation mode, but once I wake it up, all my tabs are still open. So just because I was on my computer yesterday evening doesn't mean I was here or reading your bile. You and Opurrra make quite the duo, and O I'm not sure what you were so confused about when you bolded and underlined part of my post. I said what I meant and mean what I said, perhaps you have reading comprehension problems? Raven, I'm kind of most surprised by you. You certainly had plenty of jabs to take at me, along with lots of presumptions about my friend's age, health, income, and you would be wrong on all counts.
I've been told I was not appreciative, and that I should not have shared my experience in VP. I read threads all the time where people are sharing annoying experiences and asking people what they think....yet when I do it, suddenly I'm a horrible person? Seems a bit hypocritical to me. I said nothing disparaging about my friend, I just shared my experience as it played out yesterday, and my disappointment. It doesn't mean I didn't appreciate my time with her, in fact we had a perfectly lovely lunch, right up to the part where it got awkward. I even mentioned in my post, it had nothing to do with the money, it was just a bit disappointing when someone says they want to "treat" you, and it goes much differently. I also did not begrudge Sister from spending time with her nieces, but again this is something and my friend planned weeks ago, so to have someone cancel on you the morning of your birthday for something that was not an emergency (and no her nieces do not live out of town they live here and see each other frequently) seemed rude to me. All of you that are so fast to judge me, I have to wonder if your friends did that to you, if you would be so pleased about it? The subject of my post was "How would YOU feel about this scenario?" Not, please tell me how I should feel about this, because I explained how it made me feel. I wondered how YOU would feel if such a thing happened to YOU with YOUR friends. Some posters got it, some used it as an opportunity to insult me, and that's fine too. In reading all 8 pages, it seems much snark was deleted, even though some remains, and if it makes you women feel better to insult, more power to you.
To clarify, my friend is the one who lives in the nursing home, she is considered a resident, not a patient. I met her the day my father was admitted there and we became friends. She is in her early 60's and uses a walker due to some circulation problems in her legs and the fact she is significantly overweight. She needs the walker for balance and safety, but she gets around just fine on it, and can even walk up short amounts of stairs without it. Her mother is in her late 80's and lives in a house in town. The reason my friend resides at the nursing facility is because while her mother is healthy for her age, she would not be able to help my friend if she had a fall or other medical emergencies. The nursing facility is not cheap, and is not completely covered by insurance, so my friend is far from a welfare case. Hope that satisfies you Raven about my friends condition and income. I am friends with her mom as well since we met on many occasions when she was visiting my friend. We have gone to church together. I am the one that picks up my friend and takes her to church when she wants to go because her mother is on some church committee and always goes in super early to help set up. I took them both out for Mother's Day, and I have also taken them out to brunch after church on several occasions. It is actually my friends mom who mentioned the last time we were out, that I have done so much for them, they wanted to take me out for my birthday, and I had said that would be very nice. Even though "Sister" is my friend's friend, we have spent time together and I have helped her on many occasions with errands and such.
Again, I am always appreciative of the time I spend with my friend. We talk on the phone every morning. I also go visit her at least a couple times a week, and I always bring her items she might need. She loves chocolate and ice cream, and they keep her own stash of ice cream in the kitchen. So when she is running low, I bring her some, or some candies, or some flowers. She likes doing puzzles, so I bring her those. I have known her for nearly 4 months and we have spent much time talking about life and such, she is not senile, she is smart as a whip and sharp as a tack, and she can certainly do math. I have taken her out to dine many times, so she is familiar with what things cost. Also, I would have been happy going to IHOP, but that $20 wouldn't have covered it there either. It was not MY idea to change the venue. I would have preferred she be honest with me and we could have gone to Sonic. It was not about the fact that I had to chip in to cover the tab, it was about being told someone wanted to take me out as a treat, and it not turning out that way. Yes, it was thoughtful, and I never said it wasn't. Lots of posters have chosen to read between the lines of what I said and insert their own assumptions, rather than just taking it as I stated the facts. I now regret even sharing the experience because I should have known it would go off the rails and bring out the snark. Evansmom, your post is rude and a back-handed slap, hope you feel better getting that off your chest? I am not going to justify your questions, and you I certainly never said my friend wasn't giving. I do have friends my own age, unfortunately they are where I used to live, so it's kind of difficult to hang out with them. Who I choose to associate with is none of your concern.
For those that sincerely wished me a Happy B-day, thank you. I did have a nice rest of the day, and even spoke with my friend in the evening.
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