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Contributor
Posts: 25
Registered: ‎03-12-2018

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

DH has his man cave room. He loves his sports on tv, and I don't.  He used to coach college and high school and his dad was a coach, so when I say he loves his sports I mean it's serious.  I have it decorated with his favorite team decor. He LOVES his room.  

 

I love my bedroom which has a seperate sitting area.  It's my favorite place to be of all the rooms in the house and it's where I spend most of my time when DH is in his man cave.

 

We share our bedroom at night and there we watch TCM or old Gunsmoke reruns that I recorded during the day.  We stay up pretty late watching tv in our room and many a night we stay up talking into the wee hours.  Not a day goes by that DH doesn't make me laugh and this is both of our favorite time of the day.

 

Since DH doesn't drive anymore we virtually go everywhere together and I drive.  We enjoy each others company and usually start the day getting a senior coffee at Mcds then we go to the park and walk. From there the day will take it's course going to different places. 

 

It took some time for us to settle in our groove but it works for us !

 

 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,685
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

[ Edited ]

We're both retired.  We worked together for years too.  So quite used to being together and love it actually.  Sometimes I can't wait to be home alone for a few hours in the evening but then I miss him when he's not here.  We have breakfast together and spend the morning reading the papers and doing a crossword puzzle (NY Times.)  Sometimes he's out in the afternoon doing errands and volunteering for a few clubs he belongs to.  Or I'm out doing shopping & errands, going to dr's appts, etc.   We have dinner together then he retires to our downstairs  gameroom to watch TV while I'm upstairs doing my thing.  It works.  We do a lot together - movies, theater, sporting events, concerts, go out to eat,   etc.  We travel twice a year too.  Staying in one room for a week can be challenging but we make it work.  We have separate bedrooms at home - always have - married 25 years.  He's always been a night owl & I'm an early riser & earlier to bed.  It has worked for us.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,300
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

We are together lately pretty much all the time.  I worked up until just recently and so we only got to spend a couple hours in the evening together and then most of the weekends.  I am very glad to spend more time with him, as he has a lot of health issues, as do I, and time is precious!!!  I am sure we will get on each other's nerves occasionally, but for the most part --- it's great and I love it!!!!  

"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night." - Steve Martin
Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,872
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

My DH is disabled the last three years. He can no longer drive.  That means, everywhere he goes, I go with him.  I love him, but it's not a good situation for an introvert like me who needs alone time.  Thank goodness I have a job that I love and one that keeps me out of the house 8 hours a day.

~ house cat ~
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,504
Registered: ‎05-22-2014

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?


@catwhisperer wrote:

24/7.  I am a 24/7 caregiver for DH, thus the reason I now have high BP and other health issues.


@catwhisperer, I am so sorry to hear about your situation.  You are to be admired for your love and dedication, but somehow you have to find a way to get a break now and then.  Could you find someone to stay with him while you get out of the house once in a while?  I have a friend who was in your situation, and getting out once in a while was her salvation.  And DH’s sister is now in the same situation.  I do hope you can get some relief now and then.  All my best to you!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,605
Registered: ‎07-11-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?


@PamfromCT wrote:

@catwhisperer wrote:

24/7.  I am a 24/7 caregiver for DH, thus the reason I now have high BP and other health issues.


@catwhisperer, I am so sorry to hear about your situation.  You are to be admired for your love and dedication, but somehow you have to find a way to get a break now and then.  Could you find someone to stay with him while you get out of the house once in a while?  I have a friend who was in your situation, and getting out once in a while was her salvation.  And DH’s sister is now in the same situation.  I do hope you can get some relief now and then.  All my best to you!


@PamfromCT.....thank you. My doctor is aware of my situation and insisted that I get out every day to walk, which I do if it isn't raining. I don't have anyone to stay with DH, so if I need to go the store or anywhere else, I don't stay gone for very long. 

 

I'm sorry your SIL is now in the same situation. Most people have family members who are willing and able to help out, but I don't have any family near me.

I promise to remind myself every day that I am strong, courageous, and resilient.
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,632
Registered: ‎04-05-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

For the last 18 years of my 43 year marriage, I've run my husband's office...so we spend a lot of time together! It's worked out pretty well for the most part--but when we get home we often go in different directions for awhile!

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,502
Registered: ‎03-02-2016

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

My husband retired last summer. I had retired years before that. I love having him around. I had wanted him to retire earlier but waiting till he was 62 was better financially. We have had a great time so far. To make his retirement year a memorable one we traveled. Every single month we traveled somewhere. Out West, down South to Florida, the Cape, farther North it was a great year!  Now this year we will still travel, just less. We have started home projects, redoing a bathroom, retiling floors, tossing out or giving away stuff. We also have our alone time. He does his volunteering around the community and I do mine. But for the most part with the exception of a few hours per day we are together. Works very well for us.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,162
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

We both work now but in 12 months will be retired. Different personalities. He's a restless extrovert and I'm a contented ambivert (middle of the road personality). He needs his people fix but I don't always need that. I'm more concerned about him getting bored at home. He's worked since age 14. Don't think I will get bored. We watch different kinds of shows but we generally have one show an evening we enjoy watching / discussing. Try to have dinner together but he has a couple of board (bored?) meetings a month and checks on his aging parents a couple of nights a week. We have a good relationship. I hope that isn't tested when we retire. After 40 years of marriage, we'll figure it out!    

"I took a walk in the woods and came out taller than the trees." Henry David Thoreau
Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,994
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How much time daily do you spend WITH or AROUND your Significant Other?

I depends on the day.   Now that we've both fully retired and moved 1/2 across the country, we do spend more time together.   I'm usually gone on Tuesday and Sat. afternoons playing bridge and soon I'll be playing on Wed. afternoon too.  

 

I have a monthly Women's club meeting.   We both like to walk and try to get 10,000+ steps in every day but it's been so cold and snowy here that we're failing miserably in that goal .   We need to buy cold weather outdoor clothing but haven't done that yet.  

 

Even when we're home we go our separate ways for most of the evening.   We like different TV shows, me sports and him not.   So I can usually find some game to watch, if I want.   We have 3 TV's in our tiny casita so he's well fixed for watching TV or a movie or whatever.  

 

I've been reading more since we got settled in our new location and enjoying that.   

 

We do run errands together most of the time and have lunch out.  All in all I'd say we've found a good balance of separate and together.