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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,756
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?

[ Edited ]

Ghoulish question, imo. Why do so many take a census on holiday activities?

 

ETA, we leave flowers on birthdays.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,752
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?


@sunshine45 wrote:




 

@Noel7

it seems as if more and more people are choosing cremation. my mom, who is 75, says she wants to be cremated. i wasnt so happy about her decision, but it IS her decision and of course we will respect it. she wants some of her ashes strewn where my fathers grave is (actually her headstone is already there with no death date), some at her homes, and some in the atlantic ocean.

 

our family graves are all not in the same cemetery.....they are in different parts of baltimore/maryland and some are overseas. the cemetery my father is in is so well take care of.......green grass, ponds, fountains, trees, benches, swans and ducks and other wildlife. they do not allow artificial flowers, planted flowers, or any type of memorials setup. no headstones and grave markers or flat markers and must be close to the ground.  there is also a pet section of the cemetery.

 

of course in baltimore we do have many older churches and cemeteries with beautiful headstones and mausoleums.


********************************

 

Hi @sunshine45

 

Yes, it does seem that way, I agree with you.  I think part of the reason is that some areas are running out of room for cemeteries.  Cremation is probably less expensive, too, no need to embalm.

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,019
Registered: ‎08-08-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?


@Sooner wrote:

Honor them while they are alive; remember them when they are gone.  What you do after they are gone is about what satisfies you. 


Even what we do to satisfy ourselves is often good for others.

 

Seeing that people will care for graves and cemeteries in non paid capacities, demonstrates to future generations what should be. That places of burial are to be cared for and maintained, and preserved as part of history and a shared culture.

 

Should any individuals care not to participate, that is their choice, but diminishing what the grounds and the rituals performed while caring for those grounds stands for, and how it preserves history is rather short sighted.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,019
Registered: ‎08-08-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?


@Burnsite wrote:

Ghoulish question, imo. Why do so many take a census on holiday activities?

 

ETA, we leave flowers on birthdays.


Ghoulish question? That really makes me laugh!

 

The only way I can see someone finding that question 'ghoulish' is if they have a hang up about the one thing we all are going to do, die, and haven't come to mature terms with the facts of life ( that ultimately, it ends).

 

The holiday in question is all about death, so I don't see the question in any way inappropriate. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,988
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?

Just because you are cremated ,does not mean you have no  graveyard ,or headstone,both my son,and husband were cremated,and we have a headstone for both.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,019
Registered: ‎08-08-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?


@goldensrbest wrote:

Just because you are cremated ,does not mean you have no  graveyard ,or headstone,both my son,and husband were cremated,and we have a headstone for both.


@goldensrbest

 

This is absolutely true, and I had noticed some posters who just assumed that if you were cremated, that there was no 'place' to visit. In fact, all the people I know who have chosen cremation have had their ashes buried in a cemetery as well. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,988
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?


@Mominohio wrote:

@goldensrbest wrote:

Just because you are cremated ,does not mean you have no  graveyard ,or headstone,both my son,and husband were cremated,and we have a headstone for both.


@goldensrbest

 

This is absolutely true, and I had noticed some posters who just assumed that if you were cremated, that there was no 'place' to visit. In fact, all the people I know who have chosen cremation have had their ashes buried in a cemetery as well. 


Yes, many do, i will be the same .

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,475
Registered: ‎03-14-2015

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?

While that may be true, what is also true, is that a lot of people have their ashes scattered.

 

So, therefore, there is no place to visit or "maintain".

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,111
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?

[ Edited ]

We decorated all the graves yesterday. We have two different cemeteries to visit in our city and another in a close by city. We have around twenty graves of friends and relatives to decorate. On some of the more distant relatives, we just use an artificial flower from the Dollar Tree. Also, we always bring  along five or six extra flowers to put on graves of veterans or infants who have nothing on their graves.

 

My brother is buried in Philadelphia. His family is Jewish. In that cemetery (and maybe all Jewish cemeteries) you do not put flowers on the grave. You put a pebble on top of the stone each time you visit. Throughout the year, they pick up any really attractive pebbles they find and save them until their next visit to the cemetery.

 

My brother was a history professor of Ancient Eastern Religions. We have a small piece of the Great Wall of China that a relative picked up on a trip to China. I'm saving it to put on his grave the next time I visit.

A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal. ~~ Steve Maraboli
Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,517
Registered: ‎09-18-2014

Re: How many will be decorating grave this weekend?


@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

While that may be true, what is also true, is that a lot of people have their ashes scattered.

 

So, therefore, there is no place to visit or "maintain".


___________________________________________________________

ITA

I have no intention of having my ashes placed in a cemetary.

 

Since childhood, I've thought the whole idea of burying bodies was both barbaric and a waste of land.  Just an opinion I've had for most of my life. Anyone who knows me knows I refuse to have a religious funeral, a wake or a burial.

 

 My parents are buried over 1,000 miles from where I live, so I don't visit their graves.

~Enough is enough~