Community Chat

[Mary Bailey]

Tomorrow is the first time going to my Dad's grave since he died 12.28.15.  After that, everyone is coming to our home for huge lunch.  I almost went to his grave before now, but just I couldn't do it.

[MarLoCat]

[151949]

For some of us decorating graves is important way that we show love and respect to the deceased.I guess it depends on how one is raised.Some cultures really honor this and others I guess don't.I always feel like I'm doing something very special for my ancestors. My DH and I have 4 gravesites in one cemetary and 5 others in other cemeteries to care for. As we get older it has become quite a task, and takes us 2 days .

[Mothertrucker]

I am in California...my parents are buried at Arlington....I sure hope someone puts a flag there this weekend..so far away...but, that was their wish..sad as it makes me sometimes....

[walkingal]

Yes, my sister and I will be going to the graveyard tomorrow to put flags at the graves of our father, grandfather, uncle, and cousin, all veterans.  We go to the graveyard a lot during the year to decorate all of our relatives' graves at Easter, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Mothers and Fathers Day, birthdays.  This has always been a family tradition for us.   

[Sooner]

I have chosen to give up on decorating graves, because I live far away and don't see a point in it anyway.

[Sooner]

Honor them while they are alive; remember them when they are gone.  What you do after they are gone is about what satisfies you. 

[Noel7]

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@151949 wrote:

For some of us decorating graves is important way that we show love and respect to the deceased.I guess it depends on how one is raised.Some cultures really honor this and others I guess don't.I always feel like I'm doing something very special for my ancestors. My DH and I have 4 gravesites in one cemetary and 5 others in other cemeteries to care for. As we get older it has become quite a task, and takes us 2 days .

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@151949

Many people chose cremation not burial.  

And many of those people chose to have their ashes scatter at sea or other areas.

There is no grave to visit or attend to.  Their choice.

[Jayhawk Girl]

I went to the cemetery today to put flowers on my dad, brother and sister's graves. Today was particularly emotional for me and I kind of had my own little pity party.  Oh, well.

[sunshine45]

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@Noel7 wrote:

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@151949 wrote:

For some of us decorating graves is important way that we show love and respect to the deceased.I guess it depends on how one is raised.Some cultures really honor this and others I guess don't.I always feel like I'm doing something very special for my ancestors. My DH and I have 4 gravesites in one cemetary and 5 others in other cemeteries to care for. As we get older it has become quite a task, and takes us 2 days .

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@151949

Many people chose cremation not burial.  

And many of those people chose to have their ashes scatter at sea or other areas.

There is no grave to visit or attend to.  Their choice.

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@Noel7 wrote:

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@151949 wrote:

For some of us decorating graves is important way that we show love and respect to the deceased.I guess it depends on how one is raised.Some cultures really honor this and others I guess don't.I always feel like I'm doing something very special for my ancestors. My DH and I have 4 gravesites in one cemetary and 5 others in other cemeteries to care for. As we get older it has become quite a task, and takes us 2 days .

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@151949

Many people chose cremation not burial.  

And many of those people chose to have their ashes scatter at sea or other areas.

There is no grave to visit or attend to.  Their choice.

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@Noel7

it seems as if more and more people are choosing cremation. my mom, who is 75, says she wants to be cremated. i wasnt so happy about her decision, but it IS her decision and of course we will respect it. she wants some of her ashes strewn where my fathers grave is (actually her headstone is already there with no death date), some at her homes, and some in the atlantic ocean.

our family graves are all not in the same cemetery.....they are in different parts of baltimore/maryland and some are overseas. the cemetery my father is in is so well take care of.......green grass, ponds, fountains, trees, benches, swans and ducks and other wildlife. they do not allow artificial flowers, planted flowers, or any type of memorials setup. no headstones and grave markers or flat markers and must be close to the ground.  there is also a pet section of the cemetery.

of course in baltimore we do have many older churches and cemeteries with beautiful headstones and mausoleums.