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Honored Contributor
Posts: 43,342
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

[ Edited ]

I'm retired now and can say I worked with some lulu's (no offense or any Lulu's here) in the last 10 years of working.

 

When it came to rude co-workers directing rudeness at me I found a comment like "Excuse You?" would get their attention.  Most of the people I worked around knew me well enough to catch a look I would give them which usually squashed any snotty behavior on their part.

 

Now, when it comes to rude management.  Whew boy, I could write a book on that one.  Man I've dealt with rude, sarcastic, childish, you name it behavior. 

 

My mother taught me to never let 'em see you sweat and for God's sake, unless you learn someone has died while on the job, never let 'em see you cry either.

 

Even when I could feel my temper creeping up, I'd just look at management like I could see through them.  I didn't let them get my goat.  I also prayed alot (quietly, inside my head) that I would keep my mouth shut and not say what I was thinking because I wanted the house paid off, rofl.

 

99% of the time, it's not the work, it's the people.  Some folks just get up in the morning wanting to kick the dog, you know.  I found that being grateful that I was me helped alot.  I worked with some miserable women.  

There are times when you must speak, not because you are going to change the opposing side, but because if you do not speak, they have changed you.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,591
Registered: ‎09-16-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

@Bird mama : Totally understand. Last five years of work manager tried everything to make me walk out. I knew that God provided me with the job and would give me the exit plan. We went several years without a pay raise. The October before my disability exit received a raise and that made a difference in my retirement salary. I went to several retirement luncheons. The last one I attended recently retired manager was there. She made a comment directed at me. I paused to see if others would speak up or support me but they didn’t. I got up and walked out and never looked back. Southern Bee 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,917
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

@SouthernBee wow..it must hav felt crazy good not having to put up with any more junk and giving them all the rear view frosted the cake.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,394
Registered: ‎04-19-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

HR’s role in a corporation is to protect the company from lawsuits. The corporate line about protecting employees is in place to comply with legal requirements but it’s evident that this is lip service when the complainer is perceived as the problem and abusive managers are given a pass. I see this happen too many times. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,591
Registered: ‎09-16-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

@dex : I am Blessed and  have been retired 19 years. I only worked 23 years. Ironically- I still have nightmares about work and and the manager. I still automatically wake up at 6am🤓🤓🤓. Love my 2pm nap and able to watch favorite movies late at night and no schedule to follow. I prefer to be positive and enjoy giggles instead of crying. Southern Bee 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,917
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

@SouthernBee I love my retirement too.I have ya beat..20 years for me.I still hate to think about my last few years at work and I know what you mean about a nightmare.The best thing is never having to worry about what time to get up but for some strange reason I seem to be waking earlier as I get older.I think we were both the luckiest to be able to retire young and have so many great stress free years.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,606
Registered: ‎06-27-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

[ Edited ]

@stargazergal wrote:

 

What is the best response to someone who show's a total lack of disregard 

to a Co Worker   I have seen people leave this place of employement 

I have seen people stick it out for as long as they can and watch it ware 

them down.   

I myself........ have pondered my future because of the roller coaster ride.

I love my job,  I love the team.    I am as positive going in, but it is  tough

to witness a rude behavior towards employees that dedicate so much 

to this place of employment.    We never know what kind of mood she is 

going to be in.    It's like walking on eggshells.    

 

Any words of wisdom ?   Any stories to tell ?   

 

 


 

            As others have said, it would help so much to have more details, if you feel comfortable adding them, @stargazergal.   I've worked in very small businesses and also in enormous national medical systems, in a wide variety of jobs at just about all levels, and I have encountered some difficult and weirdly unusual situations...  but the "wisdom" about coping with each one isn't always the same.   In general,  moodiness and rudeness can be subjective and also can be a function of someone's personal difficulties, physical or mental health, background, etc.  (I speak as a proud armchair psychologist here, by the way, so that label doesn't bother me...😉).    There's so much I could say, but it might not apply since we don't know exactly what's happening or why this person is permitted the power and freedom to be a (real or perceived) disruptive force.    Whatever the situation, though, I'm sorry you have to deal with this and I hope you can find a reasonable and satisfactory solution.❤️

 

Few things reveal your intellect and your generosity of spirit—the parallel powers of your heart and mind—better than how you give feedback.~Maria Popova
Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,168
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

It depends on what position this rude person holds....if she is a supervisor or holds other authority, you have to either suck it up or leave. I dealt with a similar situation a few years ago and was happy that I outlasted her....she left about a year before I retired. I and one other employee were her targets...neither of us ever figured out why...and her husband was head of HR!
Is this rude person rude to everyone or just you? Is everyone upset about it or do they just ignore it? Sometimes I am sure it is hard to ignore.
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Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,702
Registered: ‎08-22-2013

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

My son was telling me yesterday his friend was just fired. Evidently his friend was being harassed by the supervisor and was just fed up.This guy made a complaint to Human Resources and since no one else complained they told the supervisor to get rid of him. I thought these high tech computer companies paid their analysts big bucks, well evidently not, they are easily replaced. I'm retired, but if I was having a problem with a supervisor I just quit, it's not worth the hassle, they always go with the higher up.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎11-25-2011

Re: How do you respond to Workplace Rudeness

[ Edited ]

Most companies, especially the larger ones, have a “3 times” rule.

It makes it r.e.a.l.l.y hard to fire someone.

If it’s a good associate, this rule protects the employee.

If it’s a poor associate, this rule protects the employee.

See how that works?

 

The process (if not violating Code of Ethics) is:

1. Verbal Warning

2. Written Warning

3. Termination

 

So whenever I hear/see someone proclaiming a ‘just fired’ &

getting ‘rid of him’, I read that with raised eyebrow. I’ve been on

the paperwork end of many, many, many managers & associates

to know termination just didn’t fall out of the sky. I stipulated 

violating Code of Ethics...depending on the position, those violations

are immediate termination...no wiggle room...but there’s documentation

during the ‘On-Boarding’ where the associate would take the training

and signed off on it before beginning Day 1...again, negating any

’just firing.’