Community Chat

[chiclets]

Accept who they are and the situation as it is.

The relationship is with the son, so let it be so. He can be responsible for the interactions with the grandchildren.

You will not change your in-laws, nor your husband's attitude. You can not gain control. Do not foolishly use the children as an instrument of control.

Just do not "deal" with them, and with regard to this course of action, maintain your position.

It is what it is, and is the reality in your marriage.

[ROMARY]

Best to avoid certain people, especially when pregnant, if and when possible. That way you/we won't hear anything negative that they want you/us to hear. Often times, it's pre-planned (the remarks, etc.). They really can't help themselves, it's a obsessive habit. What they don't understand is that their behavior has ruined their own lives, filling their minds with uncontrollable conniving and deceit. A very wise person once said: "Be very glad that we aren't that way". Of course, if you can manage to 'tolerate' being in their presence, and still are able to enjoy your life, placing them behind you (and not in front of you), then that's a better solution.

[AnikaBrodie]

On 10/22/2014 Sawn said: Counseling - for you. A good counselor can teach you non- reactive ways to cope, which will save your sanity.

I was thinking the same thing. They will be your in-laws as long as you are married to their son. Try to find ways to at least be civil to/with them. "Random Acts of Kindness" is in the news a lot lately. Perhaps you could start with that.

We only hear your side of the story. Perhaps there is more to the "hatred" than we know. Life is too short so change your tolerance of their alleged faults. You may be surprised to see a change in the family discourse by doing just that.

[raspberrygal]

Go to your library and find a book on toxic relationships. There are probably some on how to deal with toxic people. This is something you can do if you can't afford counseling.